To make DD put the rest of her ice cream in the bin.

[IdaMay19]

DD is 11. This morning she has had two Magnum ice creams. I have just came in from the garden to find her sitting at the kitchen table, eating a third.

I was a bit annoyed, and told her that she shouldn't be eating the third ice cream as she had already had two that day, and she should think of leaving some for other people. I thought that perhaps DH didn't realise she'd had two earlier and was allowing her a treat, so asked if she had checked with DH if she could have the ice cream. She said yes. At that point DH wandered in and I said "you do realise that's her third Magnum today?" he said "I didn't know she was having it?"

DD then said "well I asked if I could have supper". I told her she was lying by omission, because supper has always, for almost a decade, been fruit or toast,as she knows well,and she knew that neither DH or I would have said yes to supper being the third Magnum of the day!

By this point I was annoyed that she'd been sneaky more than I was annoyed at the actual eating of the ice cream, so I made her put the rest of it in the bin. She's now stomped off in a huff.

AIBU? I know it's summer, but as well as the ice cream she's had fries and a Coke on our day out today, plus biscuits when we called to see a relative earlier, and that's on top of egg and toast for breakfast and a huge dinner. She's active and very slim, but that's a huge amount of sugar compared to our usual amount, so that was me relaxing for the summer!

It was last week, I have learned my lesson.
I now have one slice to make kebabs for my family of 12.

I would like a link to the halloumi thread please

I'd rather read that than the news today!

News?
Is there something interesting happening?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3639851-AIBU-to-wonder-how-a-30g-portion-is-a-serving-size

Many thanks, I shall go and read and report back with my cheesy view point

Read much, but not all of the thread.

My tuppence worth, regarding 'wasting good food'- sugar stacked treats are not, in any universe, 'good food'. They are junk.

Junk food maybe shouldn't be, but is 'okay' to eat now and then. Otherwise, as it's appellant states, it's 'junk'.

Nutritionally poor food is far better off in the bin; there is nothing 'good' about it.

Being 'allowed' a second, even third slice of DM's fruitcake per evening as a primary schooler/ early secondary schooler has contributed to my life long battle with my weight.

I don't blame my parents: they weren't armed with new facts as we now know them: that carbs are the enemy.

I would never use food as a punishment, either denying or forcing a child to eat something. The system I have for treats is that I buy a certain amount each week & once they are gone, that's it until the next time I go shopping. If ds chooses to pig out on everything on the first night, he knows that there arent any more until next week when we go shopping. It's always worked, yes there have been times he has pinged the lot, but most of the time now he is sensible & spaces things out through the week.

The system I have for treats is that I buy a certain amount each week & once they are gone, that's it until the next time I go shopping.
Way to trigger WWIII if you have more than one child in the family. Come to that I would like to have the occasional treat food left myself, not just on shopping day. They can practice saving or not saving with Easter chocolate or Halloween treats which are their own.

Being big on punishment is always the sign of an inadequate, petty person. Because it doesn't work. You have your little tantrum over something minor, then where do you go if your kid is unimpressed? This kid ate perhaps more ice cream than is all that good for her - and nothing suggests that the ice creams were the only treat that family could possibly afford that summer and therefore they are all going to die. She didn't eat her siblings or stab the cat. Yet OP had to have a big demonstrative shaming session - what would you have done if she hadn't put it in the bin, OP? Slapped her? You made it a far bigger deal than it needed to be. Are you really surprised that she 'went off in a huff'?
Also, all the waa, waa, waa, sugar, waa, waa, obesity, oh do get the fuck over yourselves. None of it is a big deal.

what would you have done if she hadn't put it in the bin, OP? Slapped her?

WTF?

Projecting maybe?

The OP decided that her DD should not finish food she took without asking, knowingly took unfairly, lied about and which would have added to an already sugar overloaded day. She told her to put it in the bin and the DD was, understandably, cross.

It doesn't sound like a major drama to me. Just a proportionate natural consequence to having taken a treat she shouldn't have.

The orthorexics are loving this thread, licking grapes, can't eat them as sugar, and eating lumps of lard, (It's good fat innit), as we speak.

So frowning on the consumption of 3 magnums is seen as Orthorexic now?

Good grief. Remind me what percentage of the UK population is obese again?

I didnt say i dont have ice creams at all but three in one day nope

Dunno about this one. I get the feeling you harp on about her diet a bit, possibly to the extent that now she can exercise a bit of independence she's taken to gorging on treats. But I'm probably wrong.

I eat cream, I eat sugar, I eat chocolate - this is not what is in a Magnum, this is what is in a Magnum - an experiment on our guts and our bodies, not a treat...

Reconstituted skimmed MILK, sugar, cocoa butter¹, water, cocoa mass¹, coconut oil, glucose syrup, glucose-fructose syrup, whole MILK powder, whey solids (MILK), butteroil (MILK), emulsifiers (E471, SOY lecithin, E476), exhausted vanilla bean pieces, stabilisers (E410, E412, E407), natural vanilla flavouring¹ (with MILK), flavouring, colour (E160a).

Thirdfiddle there is only me & ds, we both have very different tastes, we both have our own treats, some sweet, some savoury, not all unhealthy things, ds is happy to munch his way through large amounts of fruit & veg, my favourite treat is a bowl of veggie sticks & low fat dip, yes we do have things like ice cream, chocolate & crisps but eat more healthy stuff. The unhealthy stuff, once it's gone that's it till next week.

I would have taken it off her and ate the rest of it myself it in front of her.

You order your child to put it in the bin, because you are the Righteous Parent, and you have Power... what are you going to do when the child says no? If you issue stupid, petty, spiteful orders, the only place you have to go when someone (quite reasonably) ignores you, is ramping up the aggression.

If you issue stupid, petty, spiteful orders, the only place you have to go when someone (quite reasonably) ignores you, is ramping up the aggression.

Good lord what a load of shit.

@ReanimatedSGB OMG give it a rest. It's not about food intake or obesity (which is a real thing btw 😂) and she's not going to "ramp it up" by hitting her child as you're trying to imply.

It's about a child deliberately taking something someone else has bought for the group and not just her (she'd already had the one intended for her), and lying to cover it up. Would you say just let her have it if it was money she had taken rather than food? These are terrible values to teach a child - taking something you know full well someone has bought for someone else is stealing. If she'd taken anything other than food nobody would question her taking it off her. It's not petty, it's what you do when someone deliberately takes something that isn't theirs.

Seems controlling and spiteful to throw it in the bin, when you'd let her eat the rest of the junk already. I would have let her finish, but limit sugar for the next few days to regain some balance and had a chat about healthy eating and making good decisions/not being sneaky.

I woulnd't have done that. Think it could make her feel guilty about eating.

If shes very thin, is she having enough food? You say enormous meals but sometimes people's judgement can be off. Maybe she didn't have enough for lunch... or enough of a balance.

Would just like to confirm that I've never laid a hand on DD, and nor would I.

ReanimatedSGB, I remember you from ages back, you needed just as much therapy then as you do now.

I really don’t understand parents who disagree with the OP on this. Part of her role as a parent is to teach her child to make good food choices, to show moderation and to be honest. Obviously OP did the right thing!

Also - this is not a thin vs fat thing. Slim children need to be taught healthy eating habits too!