To ask what you think your twenties are for?

[tequilasunrises]

Just curious. DH and I are in our twenties, we’ve managed to clamber onto the property ladder with a horrifically expensive two bed terrace but naturally now have a rather large mortgage.

Both our families our keen travellers and big holidays every year (India, Thailand, Mexico, Maldives, Safari, Bali, Florida etc etc) are just the done thing. We’ve been on a few big ones the last couple of years and I’ve loved it.

Now I’m starting to think of everything in terms of the mortgage! Eg spending 2k on a holiday vs overpaying 2k on the mortgage, the mortgage seems sensible to me!

Family thinks we should be making the most of our frivolous twenties and travelling here there and everywhere.

So I’m asking MNers, what do YOU think your twenties are for?

Praying, traveling and having fun before the kids come along

Sorry that should read partying!

Having fun, doing the things you want to do, all the things that are harder once you have kids but then it depends what you want in your twenties.

Travel and see the world! Seriously I understand you want to overpay the mortgage but with no kids you have a chance to enjoy yourselves.

Taking your career a bit more seriously, shagging, lying on beaches.

I'm not one of those people who has set ideas for life

but personally I made a priority of money. Partly because I realised very early that the treadmill didn't suit me and that I would need to be off it much earlier than most. Partly I had health issues that weren't going to get better.

It worked well for me. If you don't want to travel, don't. I also spent a fair amount of time partying, but again, if you don't want to, don't.

I think of everything in terms of mortgage and hourly wage. At 43, I'm very glad I did that in my 20s! People have different ideas of how to have fun. I hosted a lot of parties myself - being honest it worked out cheaper than going out

Doing things that make you wake up in a cold sweat of embarrassment at 3am when you're in your thirties.

I think your twenties are kind of idolised- in your teens, you think of them as the time to be an independent adult, have the money for everything etc. And a lot of people in their thirties/forties, when they've settled down with babies, look back and romanticise them as 'the time of their lives' too.

I found my twenties really, really hard. I was perennially single and watched everyone else couple up before I even went on a date.

I did buy a flat and I had a good job, but like you say OP, you have to pay the mortgage! I also found it difficult because of being single- friends wanted to go away with their OHs and I didn't want to go alone.

I liked my 30s.

at 'praying' typo. Ludo don't know what YOU did in your 20s but your phone obviously thinks you need Jesus in your life.

Trying new things out, enjoying your youth and freedom, travelling, lie ins

I don't think they are FOR anything, other than living.

I spent my at uni (2 years), working and training for my professional qualification (3 years), expat job in the tropics (3 years), then settling back into the UK, new job, new home, planning a family.

Brought a house with then-DP in our early 20's, rented out when we went abroad and then brought another one in our late 20's after we returned.
Having said that I'm 47 now and house buying is a world now.

I wanted children from my mid-20's, he didn't. I got pregnant with our 1st at 29 and he was born a few months after my 30th.

When I was in my twenties? Looking after my family. By 21 I was married with two DC, we moved house a few times, we both went back to university, got our first car, and took the kids traveling.

Now that I have DC in their twenties, I hope they spend it getting themselves established before they add DC to the mix.
I could see them having their own little ones before 30, but I think it will be closer to 30 than 20.

Dh and I are happy we did things young, but also understand that we are not the norm.

You sound very organised OP.
I spent my 20's establishing my career, partying and sleeping it off.
I do have some regrets, my liver function isnt great 🙄

Your 20s are for whatever you want them to be, same as any age in my opinion.

I was a mum at 22 so I haven't spent my 20s partying and travelling but I wanted to be a young mum.

Whatever makes you happy is what you should do.

Doing things that make you wake up in a cold sweat of embarrassment at 3am when you're in your thirties.

LoL

By the time you hit mid-forties you'll be chuckling at those memories and wishing you took a few more risks. Well, I certainly do.

Travelling, saving and getting up the career ladder

Getting some qualifications that will help you, separating your identity from your parents view of you.

Taking a few risks, having some fun, making friends.

I’m 26, married with 3 kids, own our home (with mortgage), and we’re financially comfortable - sometimes I feel sad that we’ve missed out. However, by the time I’m 40 my youngest will be 14, we will both have worked our way up the ladder a bit more, so will hopefully have a good income and will then be able to spend our 40s and 50s travelling and enjoying stuff that my friends the same age have no money to do now!

Travel now. Just think how much more expensive and troublesome it will be if you have to take kids along with you!

You can travel when you have children its just a different sort of holiday. I’m glad I didn’t really travel before DD as I like experiencing those things with her. Having a stable housing situation will take a lot of pressure off in the future.

For me, my 20’s have been about marriage and babies.
I got married at 19, and am now expecting our third baby at 24.
I joined the army at 16, so I did all the travelling/partying/typical 20’s experiences before I hit my 20’s. I definitely don’t feel like I’ve missed out!
By the time my late 30’s roll around, my kids will all be in their late teens/early 20’s and hopefully I’ll do all the posh, adults-only holidays etc then

I spent my 20s going on holiday, moving around the country, shagging, going to gigs and generally doing what I wanted. I'm now in my late 30s with children and am pleased that I had lots of freedom for a while.

Damn I was hoping everyone would say how pleased they were that they worked hard and ploughed all their money into the mortgage!

Realistically it isn’t really possible for us to make a significant dent in the mortgage debt AND travel the world (we are both doing well at work but the mortgage really is huge!)

Twenties are for:
Growing up
Getting on at work and progress
Play hard
Deepen your friendships and cut the shit
Go on amazing holidays before you have life commitments
Try and get on the housing ladder
Enjoy life

Like every other decade, your 20s are for doing what makes you happy. Don't live your life by what others do.

Your partying friends may get to 40 with fuck all to show for it and wish they'd done what you did. You may get to 40 with a paid off mortgage, pack everyone in a campervan and travel the world with the security of your own home to come back to.

As long as it's right for you, you're doing the right thing.