To ask what you think your twenties are for?

[tequilasunrises]

Just curious. DH and I are in our twenties, we’ve managed to clamber onto the property ladder with a horrifically expensive two bed terrace but naturally now have a rather large mortgage.

Both our families our keen travellers and big holidays every year (India, Thailand, Mexico, Maldives, Safari, Bali, Florida etc etc) are just the done thing. We’ve been on a few big ones the last couple of years and I’ve loved it.

Now I’m starting to think of everything in terms of the mortgage! Eg spending 2k on a holiday vs overpaying 2k on the mortgage, the mortgage seems sensible to me!

Family thinks we should be making the most of our frivolous twenties and travelling here there and everywhere.

So I’m asking MNers, what do YOU think your twenties are for?

I kind of feel 20s should be for setting a bedrock for your future life - maybe post-grad qualifications, then choosing a career and trying to stick with it (it is likely first few jobs, for example, will not be thrilling), maybe taking opportunity to work abroad while you can.

It's not good saying (as I have heard some people say) 'I'll think about having kids when I'm 30' if you get to 30 and are deep in debt, one your 5th low-paid career restart and not had a serious relationship. You don't have to have some creepy lifemap, but just consider whether you want kids and get the basics in place.

Totally realise that is easier said than done, as obviously jobs are often insecure and many graduates are unavoidably in debt and find it hard to save due to living costs. But in the least one should consider one's direction a little rather than simply going out and having fun.

Uni, graduated at 21, partied, travelled a lot, dated inappropriate men. Worked in jobs I didn't give a shit about but paid well. Bought a flat at 25 and met now DH, we carried on travelling, socialising, we had late brunch every weekend, went to art exhibitions, the theatre, exciting new restaurants, surprised each other with city breaks on a whim. Engaged at 30. Sold the flat and bought a house at 31, got married at 33, baby at 34. I'm glad I lived it up when I did, as I have no desire to palm DS off every weekend in case I'm missing out. You've been sensible, you got on the property ladder young, enjoy yourself for a while (not if it'll get you into debt), there are plenty of years and promotions ahead that will pay off that mortgage.

Oh changed career at 25 too

For me my 20s were about travelling and experiencing life. I was on the property ladder but overpaying on the mortgage was never something that I would've done. Each to their own though...

I'm in my 20s and since I turned 20 I have:
Graduated university
Worked for 5 years in the field I got my degree in (marketing)
Bought a house (did not extend ourselves too much so that we could carry on having fun)
Got engaged
Planned a wedding (wedding is next month!)
Been on lots of holidays including interrailing round different countries in Europe

I have a few years of my 20s left and I hope to have more big holidays and have a baby

So overall I would say my 20s have been about getting my career going, getting on the property ladder without maxing ourselves out, and travelling around seeing the world

In my twenties I travelled, partied and worked to sustain it all.

I had even managed to buy myself a flat which I'd rented out whilst travelling.
I was in fact living my best life for years.
I could go anywhere and always meet great people and have a great time.

I'm now in my 40's, have DC, a stable job.
I'm glad I had those good times because I don't have the energy to relive them now.
I'm glad I was that person who burnt the candle at both ends.
Obvs you have good and bad times in between because that's just life.

Mine where a blur of nappies bottles and pnd
I really wish I’d had the same kids just ten years later than I did
I wish I’d spent mine partying and travelling
But now they are more grown up I can do all that-and the irony is I don’t want to!
I’m happy being at home with them all

I seem to be spending a hell of a lot of my twenties boil washing pants In your position OP, I would enjoy a few more years of travelling and enjoying yourself, then a few years of more frugal living and paying off more of the mortgage then think about whether you want DC and adjust finances accordingly. Do what makes you happy now, I'm going to have to wait until my forties!

I spent the first bit of my 20s dating, partying, enjoying life in London and establishing my career. When I got a bit more money in my mid/late 20s I got on the property ladder with shared ownership and did a lot of amazing trips. I had my son when I was 33 and life had been a lot different since he was born so I'm glad I had that time for fun and relaxation.

Was def my decade of travelling. We were Dinkies, and for 5 years did quite a bit of travelling before kids came along at 30+.

My 20s were about graduating, partying, music festivals, travelling, establishing my career, saving a house deposit, getting heavily involved in a couple of hobbies, and making a LOT of relationship mistakes that taught me what I wanted from and could give to a long-term partner.
I bought my first house aged 27, and got married at 30.
I feel like I got the balance about right. Now I have children I am so so glad I made the most of the opportunities and freedom that I had back then, and I have no regrets.

Travelling and having fun
I think if you don’t do it now, you’ll find it harder to overpay on your mortgage AND travel with the added expenses when kids come along!

I feel very old now, when I was in my 20s (in the 90s) exotic holidays and home ownership were not on my radar

I spent the first half enjoying freedom, volunteering and living abroad (in unexciting places like Germany and Spain as I wanted to learn the language)

Then working and spending £600 of my £800 salary on rent

But I never felt poor

I think we did not have as high expectations as current 20 somethings , I don't mean in a judgey way, just that it was not that common to go on expensive trips, buy a house young etc etc

Establishing your careers and building the foundation for the rest of your lives, including family.

Set out your stall now, have moderate holidays, pay down some of your mortgage and give yourselves choices for when dc come along. Have choice over working part-time when you have dc. Start a family in, say 8 to 10 years and start a few savings plans to mature annually for three or four years.

If you are a sahm having a few k for treats and spends is a good place to be.

What you build now sets the foundation for the rest of your lives. Build a good one and you can have a good well pensioned retirement and travel from 65 to 75.

“travel from 65 to 75.“

Ugh. You could be dead by then.

At 22 I got my first mortgage, lived alone and was working. My now ex was still at uni in another town.

At 25 I was still working in the same job, still living in the same flat in an amazing city but met my now husband who moved in with me after a while. We both worked full time, went out at night when we wanted, bought what we wanted for the flat and had UK holidays.

At 27 we got engaged, started saving for the wedding and got married at 29. We had our first holiday abroad together for our honeymoon. Then bought a house in a smaller town, and enjoyed a couple of holidays abroad, nothing big, before DC came along at 33.

Early twenties partying, travelling, studying. Mid twenties bought house, still travelling. Late twenties had a baby. Our mortgage wasn't huge though so we could still afford a nice lifestyle. I would've hated to have no disposable income to do nice things. Would rather have had a cheaper house!

what do you want to do hun.what does your and your dp guts tell you.because as you can see from here everyone is different and thats ok.noone is right or wrong.though there is some good advice regarding time to do things.what type of thing you cna do without and with kids.
possibly renting home to travel etc.
maybe you could stirke a balance?
what do you see your future being.do you think you would rather see some places now or later?
dont think too much tough!try to justbe happy in whatever you find yourself doing.
dont feel down or blue with what youve achieved.its amazing youve had these holidays and amazing youve got yourselves a place.
so whats next.how exciting.i thin kthe key is not to get down or depresse dover what ifs.yes be sensible and think through wat you want and where yo see yorselves.but also try to once youve made the decision be happy in that and live the best you can for right now.because epsecially i the current climat the future is a whole scary bunch of unnkowns.and anything can happen.

Do what ever you want. However, as you get older you will earn more money and if you do what we have done and any extra pay rises pretend they didn't happen and put that extra money aside. (I know not possible for every one of money or tight anyway) so I wouldn't stress about the mortgage.

Career profession and fun. My 30s have been about career stagnation, big bills and little people. I’m really glad I enjoyed my free time and did the travelling I did.

Doing things that make you wake up in a cold sweat of embarrassment at 3am when you're in your thirties.

Yep, likewise.

I don't think it's an ugh.

I bought my first flat at 21 and worked hard at something I loved. Bought my first house at 26 and carried on working really hard. Had modest hols in Greece, Italy, France, did Eastern Europe pre 1990, and went to NY and Florida.

Met DH 1989 in v late 20s. Had a lot of equity to put down due to working so hard and dh's career which I was able to support for 3/4 years took off. Had first child at 35 and was able to become a SAHM for 8 years with no money worries. We had fab family holidays when the dc were small and bought a house in France in the early 00's. So continued to have v nice holidays.

DC are grown up now and almost independent. I started a second career in 2003 which took off a few years ago. DH has wound down a bit.

We have absolute freedom in our late 50s and gave had some lovely holidays but haven't done what I'd call adventurous travelling. Our pensions are v well funded. When I am 60 we will plan trips to NZ and Australia, possibly more further afield and will be able to stay in good hotels and do it at our leisure.

None of that would have been possible if we had frittered away our 20s in the Far East.

I did a mixture of both. Bought my first place at 25. Overpaid the mortgage a little, but took opportunities to travel as well - Australia, America, even made it to the Far East.

I didn’t do as much travel as some of my friends - but I am in a much better place financially - mortgage will be paid off in my forties😊

I spent

early 20s finishing uni, working hard to establish career and working soo much overtime.
Mid twenties, few career moves, lots of socialising, still lots of overtime and buying/ doing up a house.
Late 20s working abroad, caring commitments for parents, last big career move in dream job with opportunities to work part time.

I was very lucky, but also put in a hell of a lot of hours studying, doing extra stuff for work etc, scrimping and saving and I did the extra hours thinking that if I had children I wouldn't be able to anymore, which was correct!

I regret not travelling more now I have children but also appreciate I would not be in the financial position I am now (house and able to work part time)with being frugal in my twenties. If you can save and let yourself have fun then that's the ideal scenario. I also wished I'd taken more risks with jobs and pushed myself out of my comfort zone more. However there was a recession/austerity occurring which meant it was riskier than normal leaving jobs

Even my parents travelled when they were early 20's it's how they met, they are mid 70's now and have been travelling ever since. They still went to uni, got great jobs, bought property, had DC.

Each generation is different and has it's constraints.

I guess if you want to you will always find a way to live a life that's not constrained by just paying off a mortgage.