Text found on husbands phone

[roseyposeypuddingandpie]

Him: Can you do lunch next week?
Her: Yes I can do Monday.
Him: Just remember, you are brave and strong, life is a daily battle that you’re winning, Every day gets easier I'm telling you!!! You are beautiful kind, intelligent and hard working, nothing else matters
Oh and you have a good looking boss.
Xxx

What would you think?

I'm sorry OPbut you are better off without him.

Or better:

“ I packed your bags for you, now let me continue where’s I stopped:

Why were you sending her kisses? (Or whatever it is you were sending him)”

Agree to text him saying you are packing his bags so not to worry. And bloody pack them! I bet he backtracks very quickly but never fucking mind and follow through.

Pack his bags for him.

He's a gaslighting cunt.

Really dodgy and inappropriate.

And your husband called you a cunt? Why on earth put up with this?

Oh OP let him go .

I wish I had kicked out my emotionally abusive, gaslighting son of a bitch ex sooner than I did I can tell you.

If he cared about his marriage, he wouldn’t be sending these personal messages outside of work. If he cared about how it affects you, he’d be apologetic and he’d stop doing it.

He clearly doesn’t give a damn about you.

Sorry to hear this OP, but he’s made his bed. Don’t let him go, make him go.

He came in and told me that if I send one more message he's packing his bags and leaving.

You: 'yes, I think that would be a good idea'.

Job done.

He's just awful. There really aren't any redeeming features are there? I'm guessing you have quite a comfortable life and the kids have a nice lifestyle but honestly, what a cost it's coming at for all of you. Kids are not stupid. You and their father are modelling how to treat your partner and the treatment that should be accepted. This can't be what you want them to learn. Men like this don't change. Trust me. My mum is still waiting for my dad to have his personality transplant. She will wait until the day he dies. It won't happen.

Your husband seems to be harassing his young colleague. She has not once engaged in any flirtation with him but is probably feeling like she has to meet him for these lunches as he's her boss and she can't afford to upset him. How awful is that? Disgusting behaviour. Exploitative and creepy.

As for the thing about him potentially being on the spectrum. Come on. Stop making excuses for him. Even if we ignore the fact that this is incredibly insulting and offensive, he is obviously (if he even is on the spectrum) high functioning and capable of maintaining professional relationships since he is in a senior position at work. He knows how to treat people. He is just an arsehole. He might be an arsehole with ASD, but that's not why he's an arsehole.

God, he's a nasty, vile, manipulative, bullying PIECE OF SHIT. You reading this, you nasty gross sleazy pig of a man?

OP, you don't need shit like that in your life. He's an absolute waste of air.

She's not going to tell or provoke him into going and he isn't going to go either.

@SunshineCake
I'm glad we've got that sorted. And 'she' is here you know.

Never mind the texts, why would you want to stay with someone who speaks to you like that. Your kids will or already have learnt that it’s OL to speak to women like that.

@roseyposeypuddingandpie to be fair though, Sunshine is right.

He wont leave and you will accept it.

You have accepted that is probably seeing prostitutes, with some lame excuse. You will accept this

I just hope one day, you self respect means more to you than this marriage and that your kids growing up without this toxic environment becomes a priority

Is SunshineCake the bastard of a husband?

OP, you don't seem to be wanting to get rid, that's why I said what I said. I've been on here long enough to know how these things go. Whether the wife stays or not.

Can't be a husband when I'm a female

@Proteinshakesandovieshat

I've accepted that he's seeing prostitues now have I? Haha haha 😂

Prostitutes even

He seems very good at supporting a female colleague and yet calls you a cunt. He seems ghastly. I’m sorry you are going through this.

You deserve better OP.
It's not even the text, I imagine it's communication all over. This is the type of thing people in a good relationship would likely chat about at home after work. (by "this" I mean - "so and so" from work is having a hard time)

God he seems horrible, I’m sorry you’re going through this!

I said you have accepted that he is PROBABLY seeing prostitutes.

Come one op he had a load of cash, latex gloves and toilet roll in his car.

You dont pay to go dogging. He might be doing that as well

He hasnt come up with a reasonable explanation for it and to are still with him

So yes, you have accepted that he is probably seeing prostitutes.

Oh and extremely inappropriate that he is commenting on his employee physically. He is on shaky ground anyway.

So he sexually harrasses female employees, and verbally and emotionally abuses his wife.

What a catch. LTB

It sounds as though he is trying to help someone through a difficult time.