To be annoyed MIL gave my baby water?

[loudnoises1]

AIBU to be annoyed here? Or am I still a hormonal mess?

So my 13 week old DD has a very sensitive tummy. Dr has advised us to feed her in small doses etc. She is a super lovely easy baby, rarely cries and sleeps through (most) nights.

A couple of weeks ago on a very hot day, MIL suggested we give DD some water in her bottle as it was so hot. I said no, babies don't need water and with her tummy being so sensitive I'd rather she didn't have anything she wasn't used to.

This past weekend MIL had DD for a few hours while we were at a wedding. When she dropped her back off with us DD was screaming completely inconsolable. Again, a very hot day and MIL had changed her into a vest, sleepsuit and a blanket. I was already a bit annoyed about this so I stripped her off to cool her down and noticed how bloated her stomach was.
I text MIL to ask if DD had been okay throughout the day and her response was 'I think she was a bit too hot but I gave her a 6oz bottle of water so she'll be fine'

DD was fine (after a couple of bumsplosions) of course but AIBU to be fuming that MIL did this or do I need to ignore it. I'm mostly annoyed that she did something I specifically said not to do. It's just some water this time but what will it be next time, feeding her solids? Giving her sugary drinks?

I love all the posts telling the OP to calm down when she has only posted 2 of the 400+ comments

Well it's not like anyone RTFT these days

I would be furious!! Did she even boil the water and let it cool down like your supposed to ???

Ooh did she, did she. Let's get the pitchforks!!!!

I would be furious!! Did she even boil the water and let it cool down like your supposed to ???

Oh for goodness' sake, this woman has been a mother herself. She might not be up with the very latest guidelines, but water from straight from the tap has never been okay in any living mother's lifetime.

Not sure why she even did this after layering up your child in extra clothes.
You said you did my want water given, but she didn't follow your instructions.

It's also annoying to read comments where previous posters state that your partner was brought up with no mishaps but as we are all aware a lot of what our parents did is now advised against or there is evidence and studies to suggest otherwise.

Fact of the matter is. MIL needs to ask before she does. Nip this in the bud with her OP

How many phone calls asking permission do working mothers expect to take from the Grandparents who are kindly undertaking free childcare and having to make decisions all day?

If you don't trust the people prepared to help you out for free, then just pay someone.

No it’s simple, if they are in your company a simple suggestion can go a long way: “hey maybe she should have some water?” “Yeah o agree.” “Ill give her a 6oz bottle of water.” “No thanks, only a little bit.” It’s really not that hard. Bring a grandparent is a privelage not a right. I can talk on behalf of mothers who have been completely undermined there DILs because “I have raised kids before you know” what? 35 years ago? Like when they use tell you to put your baby asleep tummy down first? Yeah ok. You know best

And as for people who use the grandparents for child care good for them, they obviously have a great relationship and trust, I don’t always think it’s about free childcare either. I gave my own mum a little list of things I do and don’t do with my baby the first time she had him for a couple of hours, glad I did actually because she tried to feed him a bit of an egg mcfuffin at 3 months old. Probably wouldn’t have done any harm, unless he had an egg allergy

glad I did actually because she tried to feed him a bit of an egg mcfuffin at 3 months old. Probably wouldn’t have done any harm, unless he had an egg allergy

Are you being serious. I hope not.

@nosauce fully serious. I know, and that’s my own mum!

I would be furious!! Did she even boil the water and let it cool down like your supposed to ???

No of course not. MIL run a tepid tap load into the babies bottle..... WTF! Are you for real? Cancel that...of course you are. Your mentality is born out on MN every day. Sad 😢

I have raised kids before you know” what? 35 years ago? Like when they use tell you to put your baby asleep tummy down first? Yeah ok. You know best

So because recommended sleeping position has changed as one of a number of recommendations to prevent SIDS you think that someone who raised a family 30 years ago now knows nothing? You felt the need to give your mother a list, fine she sounds stupid, but your attitude generally sounds unpleasant. It must be great to know everything as soon as your kids are born, it would have saved a lot of angst! If you gave me a list I'd say best you look after the baby yourself.

Yes I did give her a list. and you know nothing about my relationship with my mum so good for you if you would say look after them yourself, my mum wouldn’t especially her her daughter was suffering from serration anxiety and post natal depression and worried about everything!

Natural born, no one got nasty apart from you love. Move a long

I can fully admit having a child just over 10 and one below I would be lost with babies timelines right now

In another 10, 15, 20 years IF I am ever privaliged to become a grandma I would need reminding and I would defer to my children to let me know what to do.

Of course I have baby skills that won't be lost, signs of different illness, holding, cooing, basic care, but re all the stages, development, food, sleeping I would defiantly need a re cap.

I would be looking, learning and asking for it, hopefully as A team with babies mum.

I would be furious!! Did she even boil the water and let it cool down like your supposed to ???

Nah, probably got the water out the pond or stagnant water butt

“I can fully admit having a child just over 10 and one below I would be lost with babies timelines right now”

What’s changed?

@Knittedjimmychoos this is the best answer I’ve read all day

“I can fully admit having a child just over 10 and one below I would be lost with babies timelines right now”

What’s changed?

She didn't say that anything had changed, Bertrand But presumably once you're out of day-to-day practice doing the baby stuff, it's easy to forget some of the specifics.

I would be very annoyed by this! A baby that little shouldn't have water.

Yes all these ignorant grandparents who know nothing. How good of mums who are automatically experts in childcare to give them the privilege of caring for their childs offspring. Having a child is also a privilege, there are parents who are rubbish at it. I hope you remember all this when it is you who are asked to care for your grandchild, that is if you are viewed as competent enough after raising your own.

I certainly will, i know for a fact I won’t be an over bearing know-it-all grandparent, as for my mother in law I don’t need her advice: I’ve seen the fruits of her labour!

Bring a grandparent is a privelage not a right

@aridane catching flies?