To believe it is hypocritical to support and use porn as long as it's only made by other people's children?

[StephanieSJW]

I am shocked and dismayed how much porn has become normalised in our society. I am even more saddened by how many "cool feminists" think it is just a bit of harmless fun.

Too many people (even cool mums on Mumsnet) seem to see porn as a convenience to be enjoyed at their will at the click of mouse or swipe of their screen. However they clutch their pearls in horror if you ask them Would you be happy if your daughter were to become a porn star?

Wouldn't be clutching my pearls. She can make her own decisions and own mistakes. As long as I'd brought her up to understand the potential life long impact and social consequences then I've done my bit.

Why are you so arsed about what other women do with their bodies? Yes some are exploited but some are also very clever business women who use all manner of disguises and strategies and make it work. It's a shame other women (& men) judge them so much that they have to do that.

Equally, why aren't you so concerned about the male pornstars? Just the poor wimmins. Oh, wait, because it's only men that could possibly enjoy that kind of sex isn't it? Dfod.

YABU
We all have choices to make- if my DD wanted to become a pornstar, it’s up to her. I’d just encourage her to maintain safety in terms of STD checks and whatnot.
I agree with PP, why is your concern solely for the women?
Don’t like porn? Don’t watch it.

You sound extremely patronising

Would you be happy if your daughter were to become a porn star?

I wouldn't be happy, but I don't see a contradiction between not wanting my family to do something, and not thinking something should be illegal.

If my wife had an affair with my father, I'd be horrified and almost certainly disown my father, and divorce her asap. But I don't think that sort of relationship should be against the law.

I wouldn’t be happy if my daughter became a porn star.

Honestly? No, I wouldn't be happy if it were my daughter, or son.

Totally agree with the Op.

I wouldn’t be happy if it were my son or daughter, don’t forget men become pornstars too. Is it only degrading for women to have sex for money?

I don’t watch porn either so no hypocrisy on my behalf.

BadLad

It’s not quite that, though. It’s being happy to watch for your own gratification something you wouldn’t want your child doing for someone else’s.

It’s being happy to watch for your own gratification something you wouldn’t want your child doing for someone else’s
But they’re people in their own right who can make their own choices- they’re not just ‘someone’s child’

Sure, but the discussion about porn often takes the form of whether or not it should be banned, and the argument of "Would you want your daughter doing it?" is brought up.

But they’re people in their own right who can make their own choices- they’re not just ‘someone’s child’

That makes no difference to the morality of my choice to watch someone do something when I think it is so harmful that I would oppose my own child doing it.

Codswallop

Don’t want my son to flip burgers for a leaving but I’ll still buy from McDonalds.

difference to the morality of my choice to watch someone do something when I think it is so harmful that I would oppose my own child doing it.

I don't watch porn (no interest, rather than moral issues), so I suppose I'm hypocritical in watching nature shows like Australia's deadliest snakes, and watching the presenters let snakes lick them and crocodiles walk over them. Obviously it's extremely dangerous, and that is a large part of the thrill of the programme. But the danger means that I wouldn't want my children to do it, in case they end up like the late Steve Irwin.

But the danger means that I wouldn't want my children to do it...

Yeah, you’ll get a lot of that on here. I’ll watch people skydiving but wouldn’t want my child to do it and blah blah blah.

It is completely different. Being in the sex industry comes with a level of social marginalisation that I wouldn’t wish on my child, so I am not going to participate in that industry on any level.

Manclife1

It’s more like someone else’s child is the burger. They are the product, we are the consumer. I don’t want my child being a product, so I won’t pay to watch someone else’s child become the product.

I don’t ask everyone else to agree, it’s just my view on it.

Can you stop using the word child in relation to porn please? Everyone is someone’s child, but at a point they become an adult and presumably it is adults making porn that you’re talking about?

It is completely different

I don't see them as completely different. You're getting pleasure from someone else doing something that you wouldn't want your own child doing because of the risks involved.

Why does the question have to apply only to peoples children?? Why not their parents, or even their grandparents?? (It's not just the young and beautiful that star in porn).

BadLad

I do. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why not their parents, or even their grandparents?

I assume that's because most people have more influence over their children's choice of career than over their parents' or grandparents'.

By the time I watched porn for the first time my youngest grandparent was 70, and pretty set in her (non porn star (to the best of my knowledge)) ways.

pretty set in her (non porn star (to the best of my knowledge)) ways.

Well, we all like different things. If people want to watch your nan loving it, who are we to stop them? 😂

I really hate the phrase “cool wives”. It’s up there with “snowflakes” and is just used to sneering disregard someone else’s opinion

Yanbu