Live performance parenting on a train. In the quiet coach

[Gribbie]

Lighthearted - I don’t really mind (except the singing), it’s nice that mum is interacting with him.

I’m on a train for 4 hours. In the quiet coach. Mum and DS probably around 2ish. Started off counting to 3 in various languages (English, Welsh, french, german and Spanish I think). Then DS bit mum. The response was to say “who does that at nursery? If you want to bite I’ll give you a cake to bite.” There has been a hitting incident and another bite since. Now they’re reading/signing nursery rhymes. Old fashioned shite ones. I’ve not got my headphones. Help me. I’ve got an hour to go.

I don’t think it’s clear at all who you were responding to, you didn’t link anyone or quote anyone so 🤷‍♀️

Yes I did, several times. But I see you've gone from "you were responding to people describing how they manage their autistic child's behaviour" to "I don’t think it’s clear at all who you were responding to". Glad we're moving in the right direction!

If you think you’ve scored some kind of big victory then you’re absolutely welcome to it, knock yourself out.

To me you come across as a nasty person, even if you are just talking about tantrums. I’m glad I don’t know you in real life.

Oh right, because I didn't politely accept you making a completely baseless accusation because you've repeatedly failed to read things before commenting on them. I think I can live without your endorsement in those circumstances gutted you're glad not to know me in real life though, you on the other hand sound like a laugh a minute 🎈

i didn't politely accept you making a completely baseless accusation

Not at all about that, like I say you’re completely welcome to it.

Your sneering attitude to parents just doing their best is what makes me think you’re nasty.

But like I say, thankfully I don’t know you. Phew.

Your sneering attitude to parents just doing their best is what makes me think you’re nasty.

Your free and easy and remorseless one to accusing people of mocking children with SEN when they've done no such thing doesn't exactly paint you as sweetness and light either, to be honest. But I suppose we all need hobbies!

Well I think we’ve gone as far as we can here, so I won’t be responding to you anymore, take care.

Laurie seems dug in and desperate to believe we are all heartless bitches remorselessly mocking parents with sn kids.

Quite. Talk about "self absorbed".

Ah this thread. Haven't rtft but 10 pages in all I can say is how utterly horrible some people are.

Basically I think the whole vendetta against "performance parenting" (talking to your toddler in a voice they will actually respond to, and focus on, i.e. quite loud and animated) about things which they will find interesting, whilst IN PUBLIC (gasp) is part of this wider cultural shift to piss all over parenting and parenthood in general, this "too cool for school" schtick where actually loving being a parent, finding your children fascinating, and wanting to do your best for them, is seen as pathetically earnest and try-hard and OBVIOUSLY just feigned to show off. It's the mean girls at the back of the class laughing at the swot for putting their hand up.

This whole "bloody kids eh, pass the gin, hahaha as long as all are fed and none are dead I count that a win" blog-based bollocks which started off as a welcome release valve from the pressures put on (mostly) mothers but has now morphed into this toxic bullying ideology where caring and trying are just relentlessly mocked. Schoolyard shit.

Grow up the lot of you. My two year old (who I will continue to talk to, in a way she responds to, a put things she is interested in, whoever is judging) is kinder and more mature.

Misses point spectacularly

Laurie seems dug in and desperate to believe we are all heartless bitches remorselessly mocking parents with sn kids

Tbh thats how many peopke on this thread come across. Although i'd go further, bullying of any parent tyat doesn't conform to your standard of parenting. Which actually seems to be i can't be arsed dot com.

As has been said multiple times on this thread, every parent is just trying to do their best for THIER CHILD. As was said very early in this thread actally it was just nice to hear of a oarent interacting with the child.

But no, no for some people its still oh look at those silly parents who actually interact with tyeir children in an appriote manner for that child. Just cos mine isn't like that i'm going to laugh and take the piss

The rest of it totally agree with namestheyarechangin

I don't get this snobbery with giving a device to a young child on a train journey. We recently met some friends of my OH in London and on the way back my DS was shattered. We duly handed him an iPad, headphones and let him chill out to his programmes on the way home.

Swapping messages with OH friends about what a lovely day, DS worn out etc... send pic of him with iPad and get a faux response. "Oh, I am such a wicked mum - no devices allowed on the journey for mine."

What she really meant is that she is such an amazing mum for avoiding the screen time.

I think the passengers in the carriage with us would welcome my overtired LO being placated with a device for an hour; rather than having me sing songs and entertain him or worse repeatedly telling him not to get out of his seat etc...

I think you're spot on @Namestheyareachangin