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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No sign of DH and DD - AIBU to feel really really worried?

317 replies

crazychemist · 19/06/2019 19:43

Starting to feel a bit panicky - AIBU?

DH picks DD (2.5) up from nursery on Wednesdays, usually at about 5.30. The nursery closes at 6.30. Sometimes he takes her to visit his grandmother before they come home.

She just called to ask if she can see them later in the week as he didn’t drop by today. So if they aren’t there, where are they??? The nursery closed over an hour ago.

AIBU to start to panic? DH doesn’t carry a mobile phone, and I can’t phone his work/the nursery to find out what time he picked up as both are now closed. If he hadn’t picked her up, they’d have been phoning me, right?

OP posts:
Passthecherrycoke · 19/06/2019 19:59

Oh OP hope you get news soon

FindaPenny · 19/06/2019 19:59

Could car have broken down?

Wildorchidz · 19/06/2019 20:00

And I think at this point I’d contact the police

cricketmum84 · 19/06/2019 20:00

Yep I would be beside myself by now. I second ringing local hospitals for admissions just in case. And getting him a mobile for the future!!

Whyknot · 19/06/2019 20:00

It's horrible waiting and worrying, I'm sure he will turn up soon with some daft explanation.

I think you will need to call your parents if he doesn't turn up soon, it's getting late for a little one.

Sodamncaughtinthemiddle · 19/06/2019 20:01

I would call my parents and also the police

FindaPenny · 19/06/2019 20:01

Maybe taken her to a restaurant if she gets very hungry?

PumpkinPie2016 · 19/06/2019 20:01

Sorry just seen you checked the news etc.

If you don't want to ask your parents, is there a friend/good neighbour you could ask? I would do this for a neighbour/friend.

Cheby · 19/06/2019 20:01

They’re 2 hours later than normal, is that right?

I think I would call the non emergency police number now OP. Just in case they’ve been involved in an accident. I think it’s very unlikely but unless he has form for this sort of thing I would check to just put your mind at rest.

amymel2016 · 19/06/2019 20:01

Are there any friends who could drive the route for you? I’m sure he’ll be back soon with a silly explanation. Does he have any work colleagues you can call?

MRex · 19/06/2019 20:02

Why don't your parents like him?

I agree with having someone drive the route. I was more thinking of another family member or friend of his that he might have bumped into. What time does DD usually go to bed?

SmellMySmellbow · 19/06/2019 20:02

Actually it's 8pm, i would call 111 now. They're not exactly going to tell you off for calling.

SemperIdem · 19/06/2019 20:02

I hope you get some news soon.

Original poster
crazychemist · 19/06/2019 20:02

I think I’ll call my parents if they aren’t home in the next 15 minutes. I really don’t want my mum to get stressed and angry at DH if there’s a perfectly legitimate reason. There’s also more than one way he could come, so I can imagine a farsicle situation and wasting lots of everyone’s time

If they’d broken down, he’d flag someone down or go to a house and ask to use the phone and he’d call my parents to come pick him up and let me know where he was.

I’m going out of my mind, I just can’t think of a single good reason why he’d choose to stay out with a tired and hungry toddler, so I’m terrified that something awful has happened.

No traffic alerts on google. That means not stuck in traffic, but presumably it also means he hasn’t had an accident, right?

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 19/06/2019 20:02

At this point, I would be calling the police see if there has been any accidents.

Cheby · 19/06/2019 20:03

Oh and when he gets home and it’s something innocuous, I would absolutely lose my shut with him for making you worry like this.

Stardustmoon · 19/06/2019 20:03

You poor thing. Could he have taken her for dinner some where? My DH popped to shops with ds earlier and they ended up stopping at costa on the way home for a drink so were an hour later than expected. he did phone to tell me but if your dh doesn't have a phone...

FindaPenny · 19/06/2019 20:03

Could he have met a random friend in Street and lost track of time?

IndieTara · 19/06/2019 20:03

He needs to get a phone

BloodyhellMartha · 19/06/2019 20:03

Phone the police on 101. You don't have to wait 24 hours. It's getting late for a 2.5 year old to be out without you expecting it.

kittlesticks · 19/06/2019 20:04

I'd ring the police at this point. And your folks. Utterly bizarre not to have a phone.

spanishwife · 19/06/2019 20:04

Time to get a phone I think! Even if he just leaves it in the car (along with a car charger)

Spooksandchocolatecake · 19/06/2019 20:05

I'd get him a mobile as a late father's day present

ineedtogotobedanyway · 19/06/2019 20:05

I would call the police tbh. If he isn't likely to be anywhere else, and it's now after 8pm, he would know you are worried and try to make contact?

CantspellWontspell · 19/06/2019 20:05

I don’t think you can 100% rule out an accident because if it happened two hours ago the road may well be clear by now.

He’s an arse for not carrying a brick phone in case of emergency.