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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No sign of DH and DD - AIBU to feel really really worried?

317 replies

crazychemist · 19/06/2019 19:43

Starting to feel a bit panicky - AIBU?

DH picks DD (2.5) up from nursery on Wednesdays, usually at about 5.30. The nursery closes at 6.30. Sometimes he takes her to visit his grandmother before they come home.

She just called to ask if she can see them later in the week as he didn’t drop by today. So if they aren’t there, where are they??? The nursery closed over an hour ago.

AIBU to start to panic? DH doesn’t carry a mobile phone, and I can’t phone his work/the nursery to find out what time he picked up as both are now closed. If he hadn’t picked her up, they’d have been phoning me, right?

OP posts:
SnaccidentsHappen · 19/06/2019 20:15

You must be so worried, I would be going crazy. Hope they get home soon

Xmr1986 · 19/06/2019 20:15

I would've called the police by now.

Your dp is an idiot for not carrying a phone.

sanmiguel · 19/06/2019 20:15

Isn't there an out of hours contact for the nursery. Who would you ring if DD was poorly and wasn't coming in? Isn't there an emergency contact? Do you not know who owns the nursery to find them on SM? If not calling the police, I'd certainly want to confirm details of pick up to work out from there what to do

Beesandcheese · 19/06/2019 20:15

If he still refuses a phone after this (he may now realise the massive reduction in phone boxes for emergency scenario if he hadn't before) I'd seriously consider foist in one of those kid watches that can be called by a parent/ have an emergency button and are GPS tracked!

LillithsFamiliar · 19/06/2019 20:15

I hope he's turned up and I hope this makes him realise he needs to carry a mobile. It's fine to say no-one carried them in the old days but if he's going to be hours late back then he needs to carry a phone. At least then you'd have been able to see where he was.

FlowerTink · 19/06/2019 20:15

Another one suggesting the police, it's very late to be out with a toddler and you not having heard anything. The police wouldn't think it was silly at all you phoning. I feel for you, I'm hoping they are back through the door very soon!

MRex · 19/06/2019 20:15

Yeah, you pipped me to it @BiscuitDrama.

This could be my DH on his own because he has a mobile but doesn't take it cycling because he's annoying. One time he got caught talking to the local over-chatty man for an hour and a half, I was on the brink of sending a neighbour to look for him. Thankfully he's always remembered to take his phone when he has DS with him so far or I'd hate knowing I can't be in contact.

Buzzfrightyears · 19/06/2019 20:15

Broken down car, flat tyre, something like that?
Would he have taken her to the park then McDonald’s or something?
WHY does he not carry a phone? Sometimes it’s a pain to have to carry mine with me but I’m terrified of running out of petrol or something with kids in the car.

sergeilavrov · 19/06/2019 20:16

OP, is everything okay?

Reading this, I'm concerned about your daughter's safety. Please do phone the police and inform them your daughter has gone missing with her father. If it does turn out to be nothing - he needs a phone - it's a non negotiable.

QuestionableMouse · 19/06/2019 20:16

What area are you in op? If you can post a general location maybe we can do something to help?

Hope he's home, hat in hand, by now!

lavenderlove · 19/06/2019 20:16

Is his grandmother mentally all there? Any chance she has got confused about them visiting?
Hope they return safe and well soon x

missedith01 · 19/06/2019 20:16

Do you have private numbers or email addresses for any of his colleagues at work?

coconuttelegraph · 19/06/2019 20:17

Do you have a friend who could drive you along the most likely route.

NeckPainChairSearch · 19/06/2019 20:17

Oh OP, poor you. I hope you've heard something by now and all is well.

I agree - whilst I guess everyone has the right to not to carry a mobile phone, if you're out and about and responsible for a child it is bloody sensible to have one.

Userplusnumbers · 19/06/2019 20:17

Hopefully they've turned up OP and you're busy yelling at him

Bouncingbelle · 19/06/2019 20:17

Nursery would definately have called if he hadn't picked her up. Could he just have been late going to his grannys so is still there? Have you called her?

LuluBellaBlue · 19/06/2019 20:18

Hope everything is ok Flowers

SmellMySmellbow · 19/06/2019 20:18

You OK OP?

PeoniesarePink · 19/06/2019 20:18

We had similar with DD once, and although it was only a few hours, the Police control room were really helpful and took her number plate from us.

I'd give them a call on 101. At least they can tell you if he's been in an accident.

Treaclesweet · 19/06/2019 20:18

Oh OP I hope they've turned up Flowers

It is very easy to lose track of time with the light evenings.

Haggisfish · 19/06/2019 20:19

Can you walk the route they would take?

PumpkinPie2016 · 19/06/2019 20:19

Are you ok OP? Hoping that they are euther home or you are on the phone to the police/your parents.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 19/06/2019 20:19

Another one hoping OP's missing because she's busy giving him earache ...

nothingtowearever · 19/06/2019 20:20

Hope they're okay you must be so worried!x

Original poster
crazychemist · 19/06/2019 20:20

Both home safe and sound just as I was about to call the police.

They stopped at a service station as DD said she needed a wee and couldn’t wait. He got her dinner there as she was hungry and then let her have a run around for a bit before they got back in the car.

Didn’t think I would be worried! I didn’t lose my rag at him because I didn’t want to upset DD, but have said we’re going to have strong words when she’s in bed and that I expect him to keep a phone in the car!!!

OP posts:
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