I’m 28 and currently 38 wks pg. DH is 45 and when we first got together he said he didn’t want DC. I agreed as I was 24 and thought I’d never want children. I later told him my feelings had changed and I’d like a family. DH agreed as said he wanted me to be happy.
We got engaged and after the wedding agreed to stop ‘not trying’ and within only a couple of weeks I got a BFP. Throughout the pregnancy DH has not shown any signs of being happy or excited, which I put down to shock it happened so quickly. I’ve had to beg him to attend scans and appointments as he says he’s too busy, I’ve paid for everything we’ve needed in preparation for the baby as he hasn’t wanted to - despite being the significantly higher earner. DH has labelled me as boring as I’m exhausted and haven’t want to have sex regularly or socialise much. I’m still working 10hr days (as encouraged by DH to fund my time off when baby arrives) which doesn’t help.
He’s made hurtful comments... I’m boring since being pg, I wanted the baby so I better be prepared to look after it, he won’t be changing any dirty nappies, I better say goodbye to my social life as he’s not ruining his over it etc. I’ve been very down and tearful over this and all DH can say is that it’s my hormones and I’m taking myself too seriously.
I’m too embarrassed to discuss this with family in RL but have told a couple of close friends who say many men can be like this before the baby arrives, but when she’s here, he will change totally, step up and be a wonderful father. Having never been through this before, I’ve no idea how men normally react but I know this doesn’t feel right. I’d love to be corrected but AIBU in thinking he’s not going to change and suddenly become interested when she’s here? :( advice appreciated