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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask what is the most batshit thing you've heard about yourself?

151 replies

Totur · 16/06/2019 04:10

I come from a small town.
Among things I've heard was that I had gone to have an abortion when I had moved to work/travel in Holland.
And the most unbelievable of all was a colleague who I didn't know well telling me quite emphatically that my dd was Italian. It took her seeing a photo of my mixed race dd to acknowledge that my dd's father was not Italian.

There are loads more. E.g. my brother repeated A levels to get into medicine and the rumour was that he had failed his A levels.
Just mad stuff really!

Oh and I had shagged half the country despite remaining a virgin until 20!

OP posts:
Zoflorabore · 16/06/2019 04:13

Apparantely i was born in a taxi in Berlin Grin

The rumour went around year 7 when I had just started there. My dgm was German ( not from Berlin ) so I guess that's where it originates from.

What a strange rumour though...

Original poster
Totur · 16/06/2019 04:14

There's a saying that it's when they stop talking about you that you have to worry! If that's the case, I'm safe enough!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Totur · 16/06/2019 04:16

It's crazy what they can come up with and then it becomes fact!

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 16/06/2019 04:19

That I've got six months to live. I'm not well, true, but I hope I'm not that bloody sick Grin

Original poster
Totur · 16/06/2019 04:23

Oh lol, I've had the same, I was dying because I was too fond of the drink! I am

OP posts:
SavageBeauty73 · 16/06/2019 04:30

That I'd had an abortion. I was a virgin at the time 🤷‍♀️ I went to an incredibly bitchy girls school. Hated it.

littlemissmoomoo · 16/06/2019 04:37

Before I got married, I had a somewhat unusual surname. When I as 19 somebody with the exact same first and last name as me commited a serious crime and it was reported in national newspapers. She was sentenced to 15+ years in prison.

My friends were contacted by ex school friends asking if it was true etc and even now 20 years old people still think it was me :/

Downunderduchess · 16/06/2019 05:05

A distant relative told an uncle of mine that she saw me working in her local supermarket and I told her I needed money. None of that is true. We think she made up the story to get money off our uncle.

tympanic · 16/06/2019 05:13

I’ve had to argue with a few strangers who have approached me in the street insisting I’m someone else. “You’re her, aren’t you?!” Me: “Nope. I’m tympanic.” “But you’re not! You’re her!” Me: “Almost certain I’m tympanic.” And so on.

DrinkReprehensibly · 16/06/2019 05:30

I apparently look so like someone on the cover of a porn video that a couple I know took a photo of it and demanded I admit it was me! I laughed bit they actually believed it was me and I had to genuinely deny it. I'm still not sure they truly believe that it isn't me!

MardAsSnails · 16/06/2019 05:31

That I was getting divorced.

DH and I worked together on a very high profile project and everyone knew us and that we were married. The project manager was DHs best mate so we socialised with him a lot. All the other people on the project knew him too (obviously)

it was project manager’s 10th wedding anniversary so we went to the pub they had their wedding reception in. DH had the shits so didn’t go out that night. PMs wife was talking to family who were visiting. I danced for about half an hour with PM.

Monday morning I went to the gym and forgot to put my wedding ring back on.

I was therefore clearly shagging Dave. The whole project knew and believed the rumour.

That was 10 years ago. If I run into anyone who worked on that project even now, I get asked ‘so how’s Dave?’

Mummyoflittledragon · 16/06/2019 05:33

I also went to a very bitchy, generally horrid school.

The rumour was I had VD. I kissed a much older guy another girl at school had recently kissed or perhaps even slept with. I had no idea until confronted. Then bullied relentlessly. I eventually discovered he was living with his pregnant girlfriend... but trying to shag 15 yo girls.

vampirethriller · 16/06/2019 05:45

That I was in prison for breaking into a shop. (I was in hospital for 4 weeks)

BringOutTheTiniestViolin · 16/06/2019 05:46

I found out this week that I've been having an affair with a married man. Apparently, I was continuing the affair behind my boyfriend at the time's back and was seen 'flaunting' myself with him in the local pub.

This man is a friend of mine. We are close friends. His wife is aware of, and is happy with, the friendship.

I'm not attracted to this man - we laugh and get on really well but I have never 'flaunted' myself.

Anyway, it explains why so many people I previously socialised with blanked me and were rude over the past 12 months and, if it had happened, I'd deserve it. But it didn't.

PregnantSea · 16/06/2019 06:26

A couple of years ago I started a new contract. The team I was working with were very social and often did big nights out. I had recently packed on a few pounds which had knocked my confidence, so I decided not to drink for a while to help my diet along. This also meant I was wearing slightly looser clothing as i didn't want everyone to see my bulging wobbly bits!

When I finally hit my goal weight i started drinking again, and on a work do I ordered myself a big double g+t to start my night. Everyone looked quite taken aback. One of the girls whispered to me "is everything ok with the baby?".

Yup, they'd decided that I was pregnant. Even after I got thoroughly smashed on that night out and did so on most of the work nights out I had during that contract, some people were still convinced I was pregnant. Even after I'd been there for over 6 months...

tympanic · 16/06/2019 06:28

@BringOutTheTiniestViolin This has happened to me too. The stupid thing is you end up so astonished you keep defending yourself and they end up more convinced. Shame people are so swayed by hearsay. Pretty sure it’s a sign of low intelligence, but boy can it do damage.

BringOutTheTiniestViolin · 16/06/2019 06:38

@tympanic

It really can. It ruined my relationship with my then boyfriend. I couldn't work out why, when he ended it, he kept referring to knowing I was cheating on him. I'm cross with him now, in retrospect, for believing it - I'd rather he'd spoken to me about it but then, everyone was so convinced, as you say, nothing I said could have proved otherwise.

I was only told about it this week and apparently it was the scandal of last summer! How it passed me by I don't know.

I think it's a sign of people who have fuck all else going on in their lives tbh. So they need the drama to have things to talk about - they don't care if it's true or the impact it will have. It's the rallying around and being outraged that they thrive on.

sashh · 16/06/2019 06:45

When I worked at a particular hospital the rumour went round that I'd done a JuJitsu move on one of the porters in a night club, and this caused him to have a cardiac arrest.

captaincorellisvaseline · 16/06/2019 06:46

A few years back I got a job as a manager at small community project in an extremely deprived area; I was one of a few members of staff who wasn't from the area myself, and received a LOT of hostility from staff, volunteers and beneficiaries who felt the job should have gone to a local person.

The most batshit thing about the whole debacle was when the Chief Exec and I received a petition signed by a number of them, complaining that it was outrageous for me to be being paid "£10,000 a month" for my role.

My annual salary was £24k.

SimonJT · 16/06/2019 06:54

I look like a famous violinist (and we actually share an ex), he was not a nice person to ex, fans of ex sometimes shout rude things at me thinking I’m the violinist.

There was a fairly recent rumour at work that I was having an affair with our (female) accounts manager who is married to one of the board. Odd really considering I’m gay.

My parents told our family in Pakistan that I was killed in a car accident when I was 23. Obviously I wasn’t, but it gave them a convenient get out.

Onescaredmuma · 16/06/2019 07:16

That I'd had a boob job I was 14! I had people coming up to me who were 2 or 3 years ahead of me and I didn't even know asking why I would do this to my body. I didn't my body did this to me!!!

nrpmum · 16/06/2019 07:23

That I'd had eight affairs. Don't let the truth of working 60 hour weeks, looking after two children and a dog whilst your husband "works" shags away get in the way.

crispysausagerolls · 16/06/2019 07:26

That I’m Indian. I mean, as rumours go it’s utterly non offensive - I just don’t look Indian in the slightest which is why it’s so bizarre!

BouncingBanana · 16/06/2019 08:10

That when i left my ex husband, it was because i was gay and had been found romping in bed with another woman!
I found out when my mum actually asked me outright if i was gay.
It was a rumour set off by my nasty abusive ex when he couldn't admit outright that i had left him due to him being a nasty abusive bastard.
I've never so much as thought of another woman in that way Shock

JingsMahBucket · 16/06/2019 08:24

@BringOutTheTiniestViolin do you mind me asking who broke the silence and finally told you about the rumor? And why? I wonder if this person finally clocked that the rumor wasn’t true and decided to tell you? I’m just curious about the psychology behind that person going against mob behaviour.