Who was being unreasonable - vegetarian or host?

[neverendingflorist]

Going to try and keep this as short as possible.

Person A invited a group of people over for dinner, including person B who is a vegetarian. A didn't know B was a vegetarian at the time, but B let A know when accepting the invite. A said this was fine. A made lasagna for everyone for dinner, subbing the meat out for roasted veggies for B to make a separate dish. When dinner came round A explained to B what she had made for her and explained what it contained including parmesan cheese. B said sorry, she could not eat it as parmesan is not vegetarian. A said B should have really told her she could not eat parmesan as A thought vegetarians could eat cheese and wouldn't be expected to know these things as she hasn't cooked for vegetarians before. B said lots of things are not vegetarian that aren't just meat/fish and it would take forever to make a list of all things including which cheeses she could/couldn't eat. A thinks B has been very rude and B thinks A has been a poor host.

So who was being unreasonable? I am aware this is pretty much a non-event and should not have escalated in to a big disagreement, but I am interested on general opinions.

It's a bit of a shit situation but if the host didn't know what vegetarians eat why didn't they ask? I wouldn't expect a vegetarian to eat stomach lining, it's not exactly a stretch of the term 'vegetarian' not to eat animals stomachs

She did! She said she was vegetarian. Vegetarians eat cheese.
If you don't know parmesan has animal stomach, then you don't know!
It seems a lot of veggies don't know either according to this thread.
You can't alert someone if you don't know there's something to alert them about...

I'm beginning to think I know you, Lime. . . Bottoms up!

Fiona Oh my God....!

This thread is the cheese version of "cancel the cheque"

Have a vegetarian and a vegan daughter. Easy enough to read the ingredients and if you're not sure ask/Google. Some yoghurts aren't vegetarian either as they add gelatin to them (comes from the bones of cows).

{:)}

{:)}

I'm beginning to think I know you, Lime. . . grin Bottoms up!

cheers!

Fiona
Oh my God....!

This thread is the cheese version of cancel the cheque lol

I've been vegetarian for 6 years and my husband for 15. We had no idea Parmesan wasn't vegetarian until this post. There are also lots of beers that aren't vegetarian. We are raising out kids vegetarian but don't lose our cool if our kids eat marshmallows or gummies or jello, etc. These things aren't commonly known by everyone to not be vegetarian so we just go with it. We obviously don't knowing give them these things but if they're at school and have it because it was given to them because the person giving it didn't know it's fine. Of course it would be different if they were allergic but that's a whole different topic.

I've been vegetarian for 6 years and my husband for 15. We had no idea Parmesan wasn't vegetarian until this post. There are also lots of beers that aren't vegetarian. We are raising out kids vegetarian but don't lose our cool if our kids eat marshmallows or gummies or jello, etc. These things aren't commonly known by everyone to not be vegetarian so we just go with it. We obviously don't knowing give them these things but if they're at school and have it because it was given to them because the person giving it didn't know it's fine. Of course it would be different if they were allergic but that's a whole different topic.

#bringyourownyummyfood #anddrink :)

I'm beginning to think I know you, Lime. . . Bottoms up!

FFS, things are posting twice now.
I give up

I'm beginning to think I know you, Lime. . . grin Bottoms up!

cheers! lol

@Faithless12 I have no idea what you’re talking about !

I said I call myself a vegetarian, not I don’t call myself a vegetarian! I actually hate the term but being a “Doesn’teatmeatbecausedoesn’tlikethetasteortextureofitbutwilleatanimalbyproductsiftheydon’ttasteorfeellikemeat” doesn’t exactly trip off the tongue! I guess if I was a strict vegetarian I’d say “strict” to highlight the fact that my food must be prepared with extra care.

MN is a pedantic minefield!!

I'm beginning to think I know you, Lime. . . grin Bottoms up!

cheers! lol

This has gone most peculiar. . .

I'm a bit confused by all these 'i'm a vegetarian and would have eaten it' comments. If you eat parmesan, you're not a vegetarian. Parmesan is made from the milk that is removed from a slaughtered newborn calves stomach. It's about as unvegetarian and you can get. Personally I don't think either were being unreasonable, A made an honest mistake, B stuck to her values. Fair enough all round. But please don't pretend to be vegetarian and eat parmesan, you're eating contents from a dead animal.

This has gone most peculiar. .

Sorry, it's my internet playing up and posting things I thought hadn't sent so tried again.
Sigh.
Probably infected with all this parmesan

LOL, nah, it's happening in multiple threads! Indigestion maybe?!

She should have told you all of her specific needs upon accepting her invitation.

so you’re not vegetarian.

I’m glad I’m not vegetarian but this thread highlights why I never trusted anyone to feed my CMPA DS.

How hard is it to check before you feed someone?

Most vegetarians I know eat non-vegetarian cheese like Parmesan. I think B was being quite unreasonable in expecting A to know that they wouldn't eat Parmesan. If B really felt she couldn't eat it, then she should have been polite and apologetic about it and not made A feel bad. A had tried. At which point A should also have been polite and apologetic and done her best to rustle something else up. Though I imagine that would have been quite difficult, so B should have said not to worry - bread/salad/pudding is fine and it is the company that counts!

Then she's not a vegetarian she's vegan. YNBU she is - vegetarians usually don't eat meat but eat foods produced by animals e.g. milk/eggs/dairy (includes cheese). If she doesn't eat cheese she should have said so -what are you meant to do read her mind?!

They also have vegetarian rennet (enzyme used for making cheese, from calves stomachs). Since 1990.

They have been trying to find substitutes since Roman times...nobody likes to think about baby cows, goats or lambs when eating/making cheese.

You are obviously very talented. She expects you to have the gift of 2nd sight. Please predict all our lotto numvers for us. Then someone else could do our cooking.