To tell ExH I don't want DC to be left with his DP's teenage boys?

[Jessie1980]

After being at their DF on their last visit they met his DP and her DC, 2 of which are boys 14 & 15.
They told me they had gone down to the beach on their own with one of the boys, AIBU to be concerned about this? ExH lives just on the beach but would not be able to see them from the house. My worry is that they had only just met the boy, I dont know him, they dont know him and my ExH has only known him around 3 months. Our DC are DD5 and DS7.

After what happened with the 16 year old and 5 year old girl on the isle of bute, you cant help but worry about these things.

thedancingbear way to deliberately misunderstand everything that's being said! How deliberately obtuse can you be, go on, try harder!

Just smile and wave daisychains, smile and wave....

*But the likelihood of being affected by a terrorist attack is statistically miniscule.

The likelihood of a girl being abused in childhood is quite high.
So it's not a useful comparison at all.*

Quite high? In the circumstances of the original post. What strange world do you inhabit?

statistically the sons are probably more at risk of abuse from the ops ex

I’m not sure I’d trust the instincts of either of these adults who are introducing children into a 12 week relationship

I also have a lovely teen son, he’s 16 now and has 3 much younger brothers who he has been perfectly capable of babysitting and taking out for a couple of years now

Obviously he’s grown up around them though. Also not all young dc can be trusted to do as a teen is telling them, especially ones they don’t know so I’d worry about that

Some 14/15 year olds lack the maturity to watch over young children, especially in this situation where they don’t know each other. My concern though would be that the teen is distracted by someone or something at the beach and your DCs go into the water alone or wander off and get lost.

Gth1234 - The real world.

The saddest thing about this thread is people who are speaking up about the risks and put safeguarding measures in place to reduce the risk of their small dc being abused are shouted down as paranoid, idiodic, sexist, short sighted and could be raising dc who will be dysfunctional adults.

Child abuse has been rife for decades and hidden away with young girls too fearful to speak up, even as adults.

They were too scared to even tell their own mothers who would often silence them. Teens and men were free to abuse children and groping girls was seen as normal. Anyone who challenged this or spoke up was told they were being idiotic and paranoid...

Nowadays, especially after the Jimmy Savile case, it's becoming a topic people are willing to talk about, but not completely. Surely one of the most feminist movements we can do as women is empower our girls to not put up with this shit, to speak up, to be believed. Educate our girls that the risk is there and to speak up if it happens, discuss appropriate behaviour and what is not acceptable and encourage open and honest conversations. Nothing short sighted about that.

An unfeminist thing to do would be to pretend it doesn't exist or have a "it won't happen to you it only happens to other people" type thinking and they are just paranoid.

I think people are over looking the fact the her exH has only known them for 3 months. They might not care much about the OP kids and leave them to it which is unsafe considering they are young. Or they could be mean kids and make fun of them. I personally think your exH is being irresponsible and wanted to spend time with his gf without kids. He can do that When he doesn't have them! It's his time to spend quality time with them. So yanbu

To the PP who was talking about feminist analysis, that has little or nothing to do with this.Good safeguarding practice says you don’t leave small children alone with people you don’t know. 98% of sex offenders are male and some of them are teenagers, but that probably wouldn’t even be the first worry that popped into my head if it was my DC. Beaches are dangerous places, 14 and 15 year olds are not known for their safety consciousness, even for themselves, let alone unknown younger DC.They might be lovely, probably are, but even lovely teenagers are still teenagers. Quite apart from that, two young DC is a lot of responsibility to put on young shoulders and although my DS is lovely, I wouldn’t be comfortable with him supervising small DC on a beach.