To question whether it is us or our neighbours who are being unreasonable

[ThespianTendencies]

DS - 12 is a keen musician. He likes to play piano. He also likes playing on his Xbox. Three times in recent weeks the neighbours have complained about noise. First time was about 945pm and ds was playing piano in the dining room (we are semi detached). The piano is on the wall that does not back onto their dining room wall. He was playing with gusto but I could barely hear him from the lounge so not unreasonably loud imho. The neighbour texted and asked if he could stop as he had to be up at 5am. I told ds to quieten down and he stopped playing and played his guitar instead. This happened again about 2 weeks later when ds was on piano - again it was not late; 10pm, within the reasonable time to be able to play music in your own home I would have thought. Then last night, neighbour texted to ask if ds was Ok as he could hear screaming from upstairs. I said I was sure he was OK as he was on his Xbox playing Fortnight and could I hear him laughing and chatting with his friends online. Again, this was 1030pm so not ludicrously late and I don't think we should be tiptoeing around after 10pm just because our neighbour has to be up at 5am. I did go to ds and told him to quieten down of course, which he did. I totally appreciate that we must be mindful of our neighbours, we have lived side by side for nearly 9 years. I made no comments or complaints when their young baby was crying through the night or when their two girls wake every morning during weekends and holidays alike at 630am. It is family life and having had two children myself, I understand it. I have made sure that ds has quietened down every time but I am not sure that they are being very fair. If it was past 11pm or early hours of the morning then fair enough, but this seems like we are being made to shut up! Your thoughts please.

Neighbours from hell thats what you are.

As others have said here , 9 pm to me is the cut off.Regardless of whether they have to be up early or not!.Even if they are just relaxing in front of their TV, they dont really want to have a background chorus from next door really do they!.Be courteous and think how you may feel in their position .

Totally selfish behaviour. Unreasonable doesn't come close. They've young children and you share a wall. Unwelcome sound travels far more than you obviously realise. Also their children may go to bed at 7pm that alone would make some time around then my cut off for a noisy hobby during the week.

Totally unreasonable to play the piano so late. My girls both play the piano and violin-I would not dream of them picking up/sitting down to their instrument after 9. It would annoy me let alone the neighbours. As far as Xbox-of course he should tone it down.

Personally I think Yabu. First of all, just because you say you can hardly hear him, doesn’t mean that it’s not a problem to your neighbours, it’s entirely possible that they it sounds louder in their home than it does in yours.

It might not seem late to you, but 10pm is really late for a 12 year old, or indeed anyone playing a piano, guitar or shouting at a games system. Why can’t he practice earlier in the evening?

Also in my opinion you saying about not complaining when their baby cried at all hours is a ludicrous thing to say. That type of noise cannot be helped or controlled.

Most people are thinking about bedding down around 10pm, so I think that it would be really nice if you all excepted that and kept the noise down.

Your son is playing whatever very late

If only her son was as silent as the OP.....

There's no law that allows you to cause a noise nuisance. It's a myth that you can make as much noise as you like until a certain time. My neighbours were served with an order after they were witnessed playing loud music on a Saturday afternoon.

YABVVVU! I've lived next to neighbours like you when I worked 12 hr night shifts and had to be up at 4:30am. There were times when I genuinely wanted to throttle the lot of em!

The fact he stopped playing piano but then went on to play guitar instead shows what entitled selfish passive aggressive arsehole neighbours you.

"ugh, neighbour's complaining about the bloody piano again!... he said nothing about a guitar though!"

Any loud noises past 8pm is unreasonable imo. And it's far too late for a 12 yr old to be up pissing about on musical instruments or computer games. He should be in bed.

If you can't abide being considerate to your neighbours move to a detached house.

If I were them I'd be reporting you if you continued to ignore the polite requests to stop.

It's a bit late for piano playing and shouting!!

Agreed!

YABVU! When I was growing up we lived in a semi, with the piano in a room with an adjoining wall (though the piano wasn't on that wall). Someone in the living room in our house would hardly have heard (not a big house, just the way the layout was), but the neighbours would have! Our rule was no piano after 8.30pm, no exceptions. When I decided as an adult that I wanted my own piano, I was living in a flat, so I bought an electric piano with headphones, and all the time I lived in that flat I only ever played either with headphones or with the volume VERY low, regardless of the time of day. I now live in a large detached house, and the neighbours are not within a distance where they're likely to hear it, and even so I make sure windows are closed when I play in the evening. Common courtesy, surely?

You sound like a nightmare neighbor to me. I taught my children to make no noise between 9.30pm and 9.00am. That covers early to bed people and kids in my opinion. Even as teens now they switch from talking on consoles to typing and wear headphones. Where has courtesy gone?

I am a professional pianist and piano tutor and we live in a semi. I wouldn't dream of playing or teaching after 10 pm, out of consideration for the neighbours. (Even if their kids are sometimes running round shouting until 3 am.!)

Just glad I'm not your neighbour! Piano playing, xbox games excitement, guitar music, heck are you hearing impaired in that you don't hear the noise in your own home. The noise in your house is "man made". Don't think your neighbour is being unreasonable asking for level to be quitened a bit. Perhaps you have managed to be neighbourly in not complaining but your son has obviously grown older and is now capable of making a lot more noise.

I would go bonkers living next door to noise. Your boy needs to use headphones if he's playing music in rooms next to party walls (no pun intended) How would you feel if ndn were avid DIYers, for instance, must evenings? Am sure it would eventually get on anyone's tits.

Personally I feel 9pm should be the cut off for noise whether it be home repairs or pianos. Its only fair. My neighbour has two toddlers who scream, and I mean scream, almost all day. I know this as I work from home. I have told my dh if she ever does them in, I will speak for her defence at her trial.

far too late you should be quiet and considerate anything after 8pm It would really piss me off as well

On another thread, the OP is being told she’s unreasonable allowing her 2 year old to make noise at 6.30am and she needs to keep him quiet. On this thread you’re being told the neighbours can’t do anything about their babies/toddlers being loud at 5am.

However, saying that, I still think 10pm is far too late for anyone to be playing loud instruments “with gusto” and screaming at an Xbox. It’s especially far too late for a 12 year old. 9pm cut off at the absolute latest and your ds in bed.

So you’re being unreasonable, tell your neighbour that your ds likes to play his musical instruments but that you’ll make sure it’s all done and dusted by 9pm. Everyone wins them. Your ds can practise, your neighbour gets their sleep.

I think this is a Daily Fail attempt at trying to drum up news to fill their rubbish paper. Ohhhh, and I haven't read a newspaper for many years since so many are biased. I am only going on pp's who have mentioned DF. Too suspicious since OP hasn't responded to any posts. Hmmmm. 🤔🤔

This must be a piss-take, surely!

To be honest I didn't think this was a real post. How could anyone be that inconsiderate but maybe they can. 9pm is the rule for quite time. In fact my child goes to bed at 9pm weekdays and this is a rule enforced. On the weekends it's 10pm. And no noise before 8am on the weekend, 9am on Sunday. I always consider my neighbours as I hope they would consider me. Always put the shoe on the other foot and see if you'd 'like it if it we you' on the receiving end?

To compare a baby who has no control over its emotions to a 12 years old with a conscience , who is in full control of his actions is ridiculous. You ABTU