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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be livid over this lazy awful excuse for parenting last night

274 replies

Spanglyprincess1 · 26/05/2019 05:15

I wnet out for girls night and was drinking, baby is normally breastfed but will take formula as I struggle to express.
We havbr used a bottle for several months so I told dp they probably need washing and re sterilising. He said he checked and they didn't need washing just sterilising.
Checked this morning as baby now. Awake and I can't breastfeed yet due to alcohol, last night, and there three bottles with black mould on them in steriliser. I've hit the roof. How lazy is it not to check?
He thinks it isn't a big deal but I'm freaking out that he's put the baby at risk just because he cba to wash up 4 bottles before starlising them!
I know he has ds while I was out but wtaf
I'm panicking that I need to take ds to Dr now.

OP posts:
Original poster
Spanglyprincess1 · 26/05/2019 05:51

Yes as we don't use them often.
I don't sterlaised anything else except bottle just cause they have teats and are used for milk

OP posts:
Amibeingdaft81 · 26/05/2019 05:52

Black mould doesn’t develop n a matter of hours

Those bottles hasn’t been washed or sterilised for ages

Original poster
Spanglyprincess1 · 26/05/2019 05:52

He thinks I'm being horrible to him and overreacting.
Im a lot calmer now thanks everyone for being reassuring

OP posts:
Original poster
Spanglyprincess1 · 26/05/2019 05:53

Yep as per original post. I breastfeed normally. They hadn't been used in over a month. Hence need to wash them all and then starlise, which I asked dp to do

OP posts:
IDontLikeZombies · 26/05/2019 06:03

Please don't worry, be angry at DH, but don't worry about the baby.
We stopped sterilising at about 6 months when DS started to crawl. With the best will in the world I couldn't sterilise every flat surface he was touching.
People eat a lot of mould on purpose on cheese etc and not on purpose when it hasn't flowered and you can't see it.
If you have bath toys he's probably eaten quite a lot Smile
Check with NHS 24 because I am a random on a website but I think your wee one will be fine.
DH was an arse, he should have washed the bottles and you have every right to be angry, even if its just because he made you feel crap.

IDontLikeZombies · 26/05/2019 06:04

Cross posts with Giant

BertieBotts · 26/05/2019 06:08

At 10 months I expect he eats all sorts off the floor. So don't panic (to you). To DP I would go mental, it's really not on. Did he not even look at them?

BTW as others have said you do not need to pump and dump. You can just breastfeed normally now. If he doesn't have a feed around now you can just wait until he does - no need to express "bad" milk, the alcohol will have left your milk as it left your body (and only goes through in tiny quantities, anyway).

But seriously you ought to be able to trust him not to feed mouldy milk, yuck.

Otisandolive · 26/05/2019 06:12

That’s terrible. YANBU. But why were they mouldy? Were they not washed and sterilised after the last time you used them?

Pinkvoid · 26/05/2019 06:12

Gross and you have every right to be fuming. No idea how he could look at a mouldy bottle and think it was fine to use Confused.

You’re ok to breastfeed now btw.

ChocChocButtons · 26/05/2019 06:14

You don’t need to sterilise after 6 months. He’ll be fine.

Original poster
Spanglyprincess1 · 26/05/2019 06:14

They were washed and staralised last time used. But I assume as slightly damp and sat aftwards they got a bit mouldy, it's been a long time.

OP posts:
hodgeheg92 · 26/05/2019 06:15

With regards to the bottle situation - everything that giant said.

With regards to breastfeeding - you can! Don't express "bad" milk away
because it isn't bad!

Shitonthebloodything · 26/05/2019 06:17

How long had those bottled been left?!
I've left bottles for weeks between sterilising (because I bought too many) before without mould being on them! They should never have been in that state on the first place so you're both BU.

LuckyKitty13 · 26/05/2019 06:22

There isn't any 'bad milk' you don't have to express it or 'pump and dump'. You are perfectly fine to breastfeed. There won't be any alcohol in your milk. Only such a tiny amount passes in - if you are sober enough to care for your baby you're sober enough to breast feed. There's likely to be as much alcohol in your milk as in normal or age juice - hardly any!

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 26/05/2019 06:28

Echoing everyone else on - ugh, you’re right to be angry, but also I’m sure it’s fine, and your breast milk right now is fine too.

Is your partner cross at you for going out? His defensiveness (and the fact that you’re up at 5am after a night out) is making me wonder a bit...

Purpleartichoke · 26/05/2019 06:31

If they are moldy, I wouldn’t wash them, I would replace them.

And your breast milk has the same amount of alcohol as your blood. You would have to be quite intoxicated to have any impact on baby. The alcohol also leaves the same way so pump and dump is pointless. If you are safe to care for baby, you are safe to breastfeed.

EleanorReally · 26/05/2019 06:32

how can there be 4 bottles that are mouldy?

53rdWay · 26/05/2019 06:38

He is being utterly unreasonable, for not checking in the first place AND then getting huffy with you(!) over noticing the mould. Your baby will probably be fine but it doesn’t mean mould is not risky.

Does he disapprove of you going out or something?

TitianaTitsling · 26/05/2019 06:40

Agree don't worry about the alcohol, my go said it's be like a shot of vodka in a swimming pool provided you weren't so drunk you are incapacitated and your blood alcohol was through the roof!

Poundlandkate · 26/05/2019 06:41

I've never known a bottle to go mouldy before. Weren't they washed last time they were used?

alittleprivacy · 26/05/2019 06:43

Please just breastfeed now as normal. The ‘pump and dump’ trend is unscientific bullshit. The amount of alcohol that will get in your breastmilk is negligible. And you risk mastitis by missing feeding him when your body is ready to.

FenellaMaxwell · 26/05/2019 06:45

You’ve been really misinformed, presumably by someone as ignorant as snow, about this “bad milk” business. There’s more alcohol in orange
Juice than in the breast milk of someone who’s been drinking. In order for there to be enough alcohol in your breast milk to affect the baby you’d have to be too drunk to pick them up.

And yes your DH is an arse.

YourSarcasmIsDripping · 26/05/2019 06:47

You have every right to be cross. Somehow I have a feeling if you gave him mouldy bread or gave him food on a mouldy plate he wouldn't be so "meh,it doesn't matter".

However, baby will be fine.

Now there are a few reasons why he might've done that:

1.he's lazy. Either not bothering with any of the bottles or just doing one and leaving the rest for you.

2.he doesn't think it's a big deal or didn't notice to begin with and now he's sulking because you did.

  1. He wanted to teach you a lesson, so either you don't go out again, or if you do dare, you'll be so worried you'll sort and check everything and make life easier for him.
papergate · 26/05/2019 06:50

I must admit I would be worried if my baby drank from a mouldy bottle.

I'm sure it's ok to breastfeed now though.

LadyRannaldini · 26/05/2019 06:51

If you really cared that much then you wouldn't be drinking whilst breast feeding!

Does that halo not cause headaches?

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