Getting old is harder for attractive people

[SignedUpJust4This]

My sister is really struggling with accepting the aging process. She is approaching 50 and it's all she talks about. I am a bit younger but couldn't care less.

I am trying to work out if this is simply because I'm younger or if it's because she was always the good looking one. I am not worried about losing my looks as such because I never had any in the first place. Is aging harder to accept when you were previous a looker? Interested to hear other people's experiences.

Have to say I’m definitely getting vainer as I’m aging! Not for anyone else’s approval just more aware of how I look! I don’t want to be 30 again by any means I just want to look good to me. I do wish wish I bloody knew how lovely I looked at 20 when I was 20! Youth is wasted on the young 😂 ah well gin helps

MrsC I always love to read your posts. One of the last MNetters I recognise. Good luck my darling. And I believe that you are are very good looking. I've read posts from people who've been on meetups that at attest to that fact.

I was never 'all that' facially to begin with (no cheekbones), although generally OK looking I suppose. At 49 I look much younger (when I bother to dye my roots), but I've never learnt the effortless-seeming style or great grooming/ quirky style, that some people my age have. I suppose I never will. Never really been comfortable in my skin.

Psychologically I'm not really bothered about aging, but I don't know how I'll feel when I start to look old old.

Also agree with PPs that beauty, or is it style, is actually ageless. Some people just always look amazing. Also the character is more important actually. ...Sorry for rambling; can't handle my drink as I get older either. Now that is something to worry about!

My attitude to ageing varies day by day. I was attractive, still not bad looking. Most days I just don't think about it, but today I did. Felt sad about it. Other times I don't mind being more invisible. Some days I look well effortlessly. Other times I look totally shit, like today. No reason to it, and no amount of make up could disguise it. On the bad looking days, I can't change it. And that is vexing, when you looked a bit crap when you were younger, you could probably do a fix. These days it's not happening.

I was gorgeous without wrinkles. I’m gorgeous with them

Ageing is better than the alternative

I have never considered myself "beautiful" but at 50 I have more confidence in how I look than ever before.
I think dying my hair back to my natural blonde (after years of dark dye) has done wonders.
I have had a few chaps (admittedly mostly over 60+!!) trying to flirt

I was stunning into my teens and 20's, and now am looking good as I age. I have very good bone structure, and blessed with good genes. I don't worry about ageing at all. But interestingly, there are some who think I'm awful for not becoming invisible, that I should somehow disappear. But I can't help that. Tough titties

Yes dsis was always the better looking and more conventional looking one. As she’s aged she’s become bitter and almost looks obsessed. I’ve grown into myself and my quirkiness but I’m
Not bothered at all really

I've always been attractive, but never especially pretty. I assume whatever that's based on will stand the test of time. It's certainly still going strong. There was a point in my youth when I could walk into a room and people would stop and look at me, but that went quickly.

I read Gillian Anderson saying she properly mourned for her youth-and she's very beautiful, still. So I think 'youth beauty' as a pp said is something quite apart, that really can be hard to let go of.

@derxa I think you were referring to me..I hope so anyway or I will have embarrassed myself! Thank you so much, that's very kind

@shitpark Yes good bone structure makes all the difference, I'm fortunate in that way.

My mother had a friend Molly who was incredibly attractive, well groomed and well dressed. She's flattened a bit of grass in her time, got lots and lots of male attention. As she's got older it's almost been a full time job the upkeep of being attractive, constantly dieting, skin care, makeup, hairdressing etc. Her entire conversation is about herself and fishes for compliments constantly. She's a complete pain in the arse now. Be the best version of you but don't become a 'Molly'.

I was a pretty young woman and have certainly found losing those looks very hard to deal with. My prettiness was the thing I had - like some people have sparkly wit and intelligence, or confidence or charm - I had being pretty. And as a desperately insecure and quite unhappy younger woman, I was grateful for it. So yes, the fact I'm invisible now has been difficult. But - my mother died young, wrinkle-free. I'd rather have the wrinkles.

I think it's more that people whose identity sort of hinges on being attractive must find it difficult losing their looks.

I agree! I'm another one who's grown into her looks as I was average/pretty-ish in my 20s and always felt self-conscious that I wasn't one of the "beautiful people."

I have more far confidence in my 40s and know what suits me so I look much better...if I do say so myself. I couldn't care less what other people think.

It’s definitely to do with vanity rather than looks.

I am getting more and more confident as I get older. Just being brutally honest and not beating around the bush, I am and have always been attractive. I am told often. I’m not vain though and not one to worry about every little wrinkle or hair out of place. I like many other posters think attractive isn’t just down to luck in the looks department (though that helps) but is a combination of this and intelligence, kindness, funniness (sometimes), friendliness, style, sexiness, and most importantly confidence.

Accountant222
Is saying flattened a bit of grass in her time a posh way of saying she wore a mattress strapped to her back?
I'm 61 now, when I was much younger I was told I was stunning and gorgeous by strangers, random people used to just tell me how beautiful I was. I could never see it, my face was just my face. Ageing is a process we all have to, hopefully go through. I'm old, and having ditched the hair dye, I'm grey and embracing me. I use soap on my face, don't moisturise, don't wear any make and I love it

I don't really mind the aging it's the constantly looking worried and tired I don't like. I met my friend's mother yesterday, and I'd imagine she's in her 70s. She looks like she has loads of wrinkles all over her face, but looks absolutely stunning. She made me think of those threads about how to look expensive, and I don't think they are wealthy by any means. So I don't think it's anything to do with lines and wrinkles. You can have those and still look great. Maybe it's because mine are all frown lines rather than smile lines!

I say I am not bothered but as I am getting Botox tomorrow - I chat shit ! But it’s more
For work and confidence than to attract men

My mother was obsessed with losing her looks & getting old - to be realistic she was averagely pretty but weirdly over invested in male approval. My sister is similar & I am so glad I have dodged that bullet. Never been beautiful but I am healthy and strong in my 50s & don’t need attention from random blokes to validate me.

stopfucking don’t get Botox - I promise you don’t need it.

I will try try once ! It’s too late to cancel know . And I want to get my teeth whitened , that’s OK ? 😬

It doesn't bother me. I'm not ashamed to say that I was bloody gorgeous as a young woman. Got tons of attention. Am now nearly 60, fat and invisible but I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. The kind of attention I got then wasn't what I wanted. Now I have what I wanted then. Warm friendships and people close to me that matter.

The kind of attention I got then wasn't what I wanted. Now I have what I wanted then. Warm friendships and people close to me that matter. Love this.