To ask how many of you got engaged after 5+ years?

[StrawberriesAndVanilla]

Was chatting with a friend the other day about her upcoming wedding anniversary, and ended up talking about how her and her DH got engaged after just over 5 years of being together.

It got me wondering how common waiting 5 years (or more) is for an engagement?
I remember when I was a kid, I used to think couples become engaged, married, bought a house and had a kid on the way all within 5 years!

I see some old friends on my Facebook getting engaged within 18 months - 2 years of being with their partners, and question whether they're jumping the gun, or if 2 years is a more appropriate time to wait as opposed to 5?

I've been with DP coming up to 5 years this year, and we're blissfully happy, talk about a wedding and marriage on an almost weekly basis (not always instigated by me, I might add), but no sign of a proposal yet. I half feel like it's going to be happening soon, half wonder if it's ever going to happen!

So, how long did your DH's/DP's take to drop one on knee?

Engaged, married, and child within pretty much exactly 2 years of meeting. Ten years ago now. But we were in our mid/late thirties.

We were together for almost 10 years before we got engaged, we have been together since we were 17 though and we have a baby together about 5 years in.

He proposed a year after we met, we got married 6 months later. This is all 15 years ago & we're blissfully happy with kids etc. We were in our 20's when we met.

When it was obvious that we were headed in that direction, I made it abundantly clear that I wanted a short engagement and a fairly brisk engagement -> wedding -> babies trajectory! He agreed, and off we went!

5 and a half years for us. Tbh if it's less than 2 years I would definately think it was rushed! People change over time I think you need a bit of time to make sure you change together in a way you continue to be compatible rather than drifting apart. Also need the initial lust to wear off a bit to make sure you really do have a solid relationship

We got married after being together for 13 years, Just decided to do it so no real 'proper' engagement.

We chatted online for 2 years, then met and got married 2 months after that. We have been married for 5 years so far.

Got engaged last year. Getting married this year. Have been together 15 years this Sept!

5.5 years together when he proposed.

I was in 2nd year of uni when I met DP (I was 25, he 26 and working). We moved in together after I graduated so had been together almost 2 years then. Bought a house 3 years after that (after I had got a decent graduate salary and cleared my debts / saved up for a deposit) and he proposed within 6 months of buying the house. We talked about getting married but prioritized buying a house. Getting married next year so will be almost 8 years together.

We were together for about 4 years before we got engaged. I think people have longer engagements now because it’s more normal to live together before marriage.

Everyone is different. My DH and I got engaged after 3 months and now married over 10 years and v v happy.

We aren’t having children (I have DC from previous marriage) but marriage was what we wanted.

Formally engaged at 5.5 years +2 years to wedding, babies +1 & 3.5 years after the wedding.

We had a deep conversation early on and both felt that we wanted to marry and have a family together, but not yet. At that point, I think I was finishing my PGCE so we'd been living together for a year and a couple for two years. DH was already well established in work and owned a house and I wanted time to settle into graduate employment before we formally committed together. Some MNers would consider that conversation as a form of engagement and we were both happy with the direction we were going in. We saw engagement as that concious decision that we wanted to marry in the forseeable future and began to plan the wedding in the months afterwards. The timings also worked around DH's post-graduate studies.

If I'd been older, the timescale would probably have been sooner to engagement.

I must admit to finding it odd when couples drift on longterm without establishing what direction they are aiming for in the relationship (even if it is subject to change) It's sad when someone (often the female) wastes years waiting for a commitment that the other never intends to make.

Bought a house after being together 3 years.

Got engaged around 6 years

Married after 7 years

Still married 11 yrs later

We were together 11 years before we got engaged!

Engaged 11 years and 2 children later

My husband proposed between 21/2-3 years after we first met and then we were marrried 18 months later. We seemed about average among my friendship group with those who met at uni having a longer relationship before their engagement. Basically peak wedding time seemed to be when my friends were between 27 and 30. I think there might be an element of peer pressure as there must be a reason weddings all seem to clump together. Now I’m well into in my 30s the weddings have dried up.

My partner and I got engaged after 7 and a half years. My sister got engaged at 9 years.

We got married on the 10th anniversary of our first shag date. There wasn't a proposal, we decided to get married, organised it and did it. That was nearly 20 years ago, so seems to have worked out fine.

We moved in together after 3 months, got engaged after 11 months, and married 6 months after that. We did wait a couple more years before having DC though, because lets face it, the rest you can walk away from if it doesn't work out. Once DC are involved you are well and truly stuck with each other.

We were together 7 years when we decided to get married. No proposal, we chatted about it, decided that now was a good time, and started organising. I personally don't really understand the waiting around for a proposal, especially if you talk about getting married on an almost weekly basis, but if a 'traditional' proposal is important to you then fair enough.

Got engaged after 8 years, married at 9 years, baby at 10 years.

I hate it when people make comments about others taking so long to get married. Everyone's different, there's no right or wrong time.

And I was late 30s when married, DH late 40s.

We got engaged after about 3/4 years together, just after we had our first baby. Didn’t get married for another 6 years after that. Both of us too lazy to organise a wedding!

We got engaged after 4.5 months and married a year later. We were older though, 36 and 40.

Met at 20. Decided we were going to marry pretty quickly (within a few months). Got to 27/28, both on the verge of finishing doctoral degrees so decided it would be a good time to get married. No proposal as such- it’s not our style. Wedding was a year later because we are not from the UK and wanted our British friends to come to our wedding ‘at home.’ DS1 was born when I was 32 and DS2 when I was 37. We both turn 40 this year so have been together for 20 years.

Sorry posted too soon. We are pg with DD due Sept, just after our 5th wedding anniversary.