To ask how many of you got engaged after 5+ years?

[StrawberriesAndVanilla]

Was chatting with a friend the other day about her upcoming wedding anniversary, and ended up talking about how her and her DH got engaged after just over 5 years of being together.

It got me wondering how common waiting 5 years (or more) is for an engagement?
I remember when I was a kid, I used to think couples become engaged, married, bought a house and had a kid on the way all within 5 years!

I see some old friends on my Facebook getting engaged within 18 months - 2 years of being with their partners, and question whether they're jumping the gun, or if 2 years is a more appropriate time to wait as opposed to 5?

I've been with DP coming up to 5 years this year, and we're blissfully happy, talk about a wedding and marriage on an almost weekly basis (not always instigated by me, I might add), but no sign of a proposal yet. I half feel like it's going to be happening soon, half wonder if it's ever going to happen!

So, how long did your DH's/DP's take to drop one on knee?

we got engaged on our 6 year anniversary which is ridiculous to me, I would have got married a lot sooner but DP wasn't bothered for rushing so here we are!

After 5 years bought house (just out of ubdgegraduate degree here)
8 years got engaged
10 years married
13 years first child
17 years second
24 years - today

Now DH proposed 6 weeks after we met. We got married 5 months after we met. I was 25 and he was 23.

All my nieces, nephews and their friends waited between 5 and 8 years to even get engaged which I think is a long time. You should know long before that if you want to spend the rest of your life together

Engaged after just over 5 years, but lived together and almost had a deposit for our first house together by the time he proposed, but we'd talked about it before and knew within a two years that we were heading towards marriage just no rush. I was very sure that I wouldn't have children without being married though

I think that, if you've been together for years in a committed relationship, 'getting engaged', not to mention that whole bended knee proposal nonsense, is ridiculous. Just get married, if that's what you want.

Getting engaged was originally a milestone moving you to a different stage of commitment from just 'seeing one another'. You're clearly already committed, OP, and are planning a life together, therefore you're already engaged. Just go and get married.

We bought a house, got married and had a baby in just under two years though so I guess that made up for it!

Me and DH were together just over a year when he proposed. Unbeknownst to us, I was pregnant with DS1 at the time too. Married another year later. I'd have asked DH by 5 years if he hadn't done it tbh. Marriage was very important to me and 5 years is a long time to waste if it isn't going to happen.

We met in 1994 and got married in 2018.

Never got engaged, but we do have 2 kids, mortgage etc

Got engaged recently, we have been together for over 6 years. We prioritised buying a house first which we did last year. It took 5 years to save for the deposit, that was really the only deciding factor in how we planned our lives. We plan to start trying for a baby as soon as we are married so your I used to think couples become engaged, married, bought a house and had a kid on the way all within 5 years! still isn't inaccurate (if everything goes to plan)

We'd been together:
7 years, bought a house and engaged
8 years married
11 years first child born
13 years second child born

I think it depends on how old you were when you met sometimes. We were 20.

We met in 2008, had a baby 2009, engaged 2011 but didn't get married until 2015, just kept putting it off!!

Me! It was actually nearly 7 years. We were happy living a very carefree life together - working hard at our careers and travelling the world, spending lots of time with friends. Getting married wasn’t important to us until we decided to have children. He proposed and we got married 4 months later. We had our dd a year and a half later. We’ve been together 17 years now.

I loved those 7 years - lots of time and money to spend with each other with very little responsibility, sigh! Damn you pesky kids

3 months for us and then married a year later. We were both 30 at the time. I imagine if we had got together in our 20’s we would have waited a bit longer though.

Met DH at 19 and got engaged 9 years later. Didn't want to get married until then so no point being engaged any earlier. All it would've meant was a failed engagement behind me if we'd split up. Once engaged we set a date and married within 12 months. Thats the whole point of engagement IMO. Married 18 years now.

First DP we were together for 9 years, got engaged after 3 years but never planned the wedding. We started going out when I was 17 so we were young.

DH and I have now been together 20 years, married for 9. No proposal as such, just mutually decided it was time. We’d already done the kids and house bits before getting married.

Started dating DH at University when I was 21 and he was 23. Got engaged 8 years later and married year after that. Now been married 15 years this year and very happy together still.

We got together when i was 16, engaged at 19 however get married at 23- we have friends who got together after us and are married and some who have been together near 10 years and still waiting. Guess it depends on your age/situation. The couple who have been together 10 years don't actually live together due to uni/jobs/life so that must change it slightly

For me and my husband, we were together on and off in a unstable relationship for 2 years when we first together, always breaking up and getting back together so I try and not count those 2 years of our relationship.

we broke up for nearly 1 year and then got back together again. From then on it took a year and a half and I got the ring. My husband said he planned to engage me much later (for financial reasons, buying a ring is expensive) but he knew that I wanted to be engaged before I turned 30 so he proposed 2 days to my 30th Birthday!

My advice is 5 years is to long, way to long to wait but everyone is different. I know a lot of couples who get pregnant, purchase a house and then get engaged or get engaged, do all those things and never seem to get married. everyone is different like I said and what works for one will probably not work another. Ask yourself how much longer your prepared to wait and drop hints!

Met in our early twenties, bought a house mid twenties, finally got married after being together 12 years. Then was pregnant a year later, with second due next month. DH proposed but was a bit pointless really as we’d already talked about it at length and looked at venues online

Everyone will different timelines. We haven't married after 8 years as we have no assets to protect from/with each other nor are there any children involved so we haven't made it a priority.

^we wanted to wait to buy a house first after i graduated uni before we got married

Engaged 2.5 years after getting together and married 20 months after that

My DH took 7 years to propose.

8 years until the proposal. It didn't feel as long as it looks on paper! We were at the start of our careers when we got together and had moved around the country a bit since; we got engaged when it felt like we had settled into our lives and were "ready" for marriage, kids etc. It still came as a surprise!

I agree it depends on age/stage of life. We were living together in a year, engaged within 18 months, married a year later. We were early 30s, already plenty of miles on the clock!

As another pp said - when you know, you know!