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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be raging my birthday cake was cut?

248 replies

Phuquocdreams · 05/05/2019 09:14

Had a big birthday party last night, I was brought an absolutely beautiful cake. After blowing out candles etc, everyone was stuffed so we didn’t cut it and sent it home. Arrived down this morning to find a huge slice out of it! We’re having a celebratory lunch with my kids today and I just assumed we would do the old candles thing with the beautiful untouched cake for their benefit. Is it just me or do you not cut a cake without the birthday girl there? I am ENRAGED, but I can’t really be with them because they were baby sitting for me....so I’m raging on here instead. AIBU???

OP posts:
Original poster
Phuquocdreams · 05/05/2019 09:52

Also I couldn’t have sent the cake home with the guests - this wasn’t a kids party, there weren’t party bags! We headed on to a cocktail bar next...well, I guess it would have provided sustenance on the dancefloor!

OP posts:
Hereforthebanter · 05/05/2019 09:52

People who take cakes to a party and then take them home just appear cheap and miserable

But the OP was going to give them some today. Surely the person who cut it could have waited. The person who cut it just looks like a selfish greedy bastard

CuriousaboutSamphire · 05/05/2019 09:53

They'll be with you later?

Offer them your birthday presents too ...

CFery indeed!!

Original poster
Phuquocdreams · 05/05/2019 09:54

The people who ate the cake were not at the party. They are still here today.

OP posts:
PassMeTheWine · 05/05/2019 09:54

It's a cake, it wouldn't bother me!

Hermagsjesty · 05/05/2019 09:55

I think YABVU. You did the candles thing and there’s still plenty left to eat - what is there to be upset about? Also, if I understand it right and they paid for it as a special treat, they were probably pretty upset/ insulted that it was sent home untouched.

category12 · 05/05/2019 09:56

What's the point of a cake at a party if you don't eat the damned thing?

bridgetreilly · 05/05/2019 09:56

You would not be unreasonable to be a bit annoyed that they hadn't asked.

YABVVVU to be raging about this. It's just cake. You aren't five years old. Get over it.

Onecutefox · 05/05/2019 09:57

You should have given a slice of the cake to every guest to take home.

category12 · 05/05/2019 09:57

And you'e being precious about who gets to cut it - it's not a wedding cake.

Lweji · 05/05/2019 09:57

How did the cake get home?

ElloBrian · 05/05/2019 09:57

Bit confused by this. Perhaps you could try being clearer about the sequence of events.
You had a birthday party at which you were presented with a cake. You then went out and left the cake at home? Someone was babysitting for you at home? You suspect they helped themself to the cake after you had gone out? Then you came home and they have stayed over and are still there this morning? And you wanted to show the cake to a baby before it was cut?

DontWannaBeObamasElf · 05/05/2019 09:58

My friend had a milestone birthday recently and her mother in law took the birthday cake home with her before everyone could have some Grin

DurhamDurham · 05/05/2019 09:58

Did you always plan on taking the cake home? Bit weird to take it to the party and not cut in to it, someone would have had a slice if you'd cut it. You mention that you were going to do the whole candles thing today with your children but you couldn't have done that anyway if the cake had been eaten so I wouldn't get too upset.

Kochicoo · 05/05/2019 09:59

Agree they might think it wasn't appreciated and have felt a bit miffed...OR they thought you'd sent it home for them to enjoy! Either way, you now have to make a big thing about how much you appreciated it! Happy Birthday!

Aquamarine1029 · 05/05/2019 09:59

Enraged and raging? For fuck's sake. I'd hate to deal with you if something actually serious happened.

MatildaTheCat · 05/05/2019 10:00

Spend the morning making a fake slice to slot into said cake for the Instagram moment? Play dough might suffice.

OneStepSideways · 05/05/2019 10:02

Honestly, I think you were rude not to cut it at the party! You displayed it but didn't offer any to your guests, even to take home?? That's really poor form. They probably thought it was a hired cake made of cardboard!

I agree it was a bit cheeky for your babysitters to help themselves!

diddl · 05/05/2019 10:02

"Bit confused by this. Perhaps you could try being clearer about the sequence of events. "

God yes!

Original poster
Phuquocdreams · 05/05/2019 10:04

Party at restaurant. No kids. Lovely cake as centerpiece decoration. Candles blown out. Everyone stuffed, cake not cut (definite mistake! But I kinda just went with dh who was in charge of proceedings. And I thought it would be nice to have with all the family today including my kids and the babysitters). Cake sent home in taxi, together with some presents (blame my dh...)Babysitters ate cake. I came down this morning, opened box to admire cake. Cue unreasonable rage.

OP posts:
Original poster
Phuquocdreams · 05/05/2019 10:05

Sorry, meant to add guests left restaurant to proceed to cocktail bar, at same time as cake sent home in taxi.

OP posts:
Genevieva · 05/05/2019 10:07

"Who denied me my birthday cake wish by cutting the first slice?" Said in a facetious and lighthearted way.

Pinkyyy · 05/05/2019 10:07

So you let them sit all night looking at a nice big delicious cake, then didn't give them any? Very mean indeed.

BoomZahramay · 05/05/2019 10:07

I do think it's rude to cut someone else's cake.

However, this is almost entirely mitigated by the fact that the cake eaters were also the people who bought the cake and babysat for you.

In conclusion, stop belly aching and grab a slice of cake!!! Grin

ElloBrian · 05/05/2019 10:08

Right. Well I would say that yes it is rude to cut into someone else’s cake if it hasn’t already been cut. But on the other hand if the babysitter was a family member doing you a favour rather than a paid sitter, I would probably not bother mentioning it. I’d be a bit ticked off though.

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