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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Beer Fear - WTF do I do?!

217 replies

GotTheBeerFear · 27/04/2019 11:25

Posting for traffic, and looking for guidance as to what I should do as I'm in no fit state to make a sensible decision.

Have name changed too as I don't want to out myself.

Got massively drunk last night, not proud of it & paying the price this morning although truth be told I still feel pissed.

Must have text an old 'acquaintance' last night... cut contact months ago as I fell for him (I know, I know) and despite him getting in touch several times I've just ignored him.

Changed phones and deleted his number in fact, so the temptation hasn't been there.

Anyway, wake up this morning to a text message from him asking who it is... wtf do I do?! Got proper beer fear and scared to even open the message and read what I must have sent him last night. I was transferring photos from my old phone yesterday and came across his number so it can't just be a coincidence :-(

Do I ignore, or own it and admit who it is? Read the message or just straight delete (and block so there's no repercussions)!

Tbh it did sting a bit to read him asking who it is but we've never ever text before so he can't have my number stored and he'd have known who it was over messenger or WhatsApp.

Please tell me what to do!

OP posts:

yearinyearout · 27/04/2019 12:52

Haha sorry but that message has really made me laugh. Just text him "sorry wrong number" as suggested. Even if he turned Sherlock Holmes and found out it was you, you could still claim the text was intended for someone else so nothing to lose.

WiddlinDiddlin · 27/04/2019 12:52

If you like this guy at all I think it would be kind to explain and apologise rather than leave him wondering.

It'd piss me off for days if someone just did that to me then ignored it or fobbed me off.

Fairenuff · 27/04/2019 12:56

She can’t say it was meant for someone else! She starts it with his name!

She could say 'Sorry, wrong Dave, ignore that'.

And anyway... I've read on here, and truly believe that if someone liked you enough they'd let you know wouldn't they? He hasn't... so I cut him off.

I agree. Trust your gut and let this one go.

IvanaPee · 27/04/2019 12:57

And anyway... I've read on here, and truly believe that if someone liked you enough they'd let you know wouldn't they?

But neither did you..

Tell him who you are! Say: it’s Beer, I was pissed. Sorry about that!

You never have to say anything again if the feeling isn’t mutual!

LuckyLou7 · 27/04/2019 12:58

Aw it sounds like you have unfinished business with this man. I'd text back saying it's @GotTheBeerFear, I was incredibly drunk as you can tell, no idea why I sent that message. Hope all is well with you.

He might text back and suggest meeting up for a drink and a catch up.
He'll probably just ignore the message.
No harm done, though, don't beat yourself up about it.

SoupDragon · 27/04/2019 12:59

I've read on here, and truly believe that if someone liked you enough they'd let you know wouldn't they? He hasn't...

But neither have you

justthecat · 27/04/2019 12:59

Be grateful, it could of been ALOT worse 😂

ElektraUnchained · 27/04/2019 13:00

And anyway... I've read on here, and truly believe that if someone liked you enough they'd let you know wouldn't they? He hasn't... so I cut him off.

But by that logic, he may have assumed the same about you as you did about him.

Original poster

GotTheBeerFear · 27/04/2019 13:02

@WiddlinDiddlin and @Fairenuff

I'm totally conflicted with your replies! I get where you're coming from on both points yet I still don't know what to do!

His name isn't common (unfortunately) so he wouldn't buy "wrong name"

I'm just keeping my silence at the moment, haven't replied

OP posts:

bubblegumunicorn · 27/04/2019 13:03

Quite sad really but I found it too much of a head fuck which is why I cut contact.

Why is it that after having a good evening... he was all I was thinking about and I wanted to speak to him?!

I've so done this before did you talk about him at all last night? I used to do this kinda thing to my EX all the time try to play it cool but really drunk me wanted the D and he was an easy target so awkward 🤣

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 27/04/2019 13:04

crumpet · 27/04/2019 13:06

I’djust acknowledge it, mention that you were drunk and appear to have texted a lot of people last night.

Original poster

GotTheBeerFear · 27/04/2019 13:10

And yes completely agree I didn't admit how I felt... but I had (up until last night) cut contact and thought I was doing a good job of moving on.

Obviously not that good a job!

I've been on a few dates with other guys since I last spoke to him and no one has come close tbh.

Can't help feeling this could be because I knew it wasn't going to go anywhere though... but he is a lovely guy and always treated me well

OP posts:

BettyDuMonde · 27/04/2019 13:13

That’s just funny. Phew.

diddl · 27/04/2019 13:13

If you couldn´t cope with him not being interested then surely it´s best left?

If you could then just send back that it´s you, sorry for the ramble & how is he?

Although the "Clearly not" might have put him off.

Ivegotthree · 27/04/2019 13:13

If he liked you, you'd know.

Original poster

GotTheBeerFear · 27/04/2019 13:16

@SpongeBobJudgeyPants never seen that before! But such a good song. I was nodding in agreement all the way through

OP posts:

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 27/04/2019 13:18

Admit its you!! and confess to having been shitfaced then see what he replies back... if he asks you what you wanted to say you can just say you dont remember...

Admitting its you is better than just leaving it when he probably knows its you already.

Could be the start of something beautiful

BettyDuMonde · 27/04/2019 13:18

I would say ‘oops, drunk, sorry!’ And sign my name.

Then delete his number, so as to not do it again.

If he is interested in speaking again, he now has your number. If he isn’t, he’ll just think ‘silly drunk ex’ and forget about it.

Telling fibs can come back and bite you in the arse, so best to just admit it’s you, but be very laid back about it.

Honeyroar · 27/04/2019 13:19

"Hi it's Beer. Sorry, I seem to have drunken messaged half the people in my phone last night! Hope you're well. I will delete your number so I don't do it again! Bye.

Original poster

GotTheBeerFear · 27/04/2019 13:19

@Ivegotthree yep my thoughts entirely.

We didn't speak for a while last year... both had a lot going on but out the blue he said over msg that he missed me and hadn't met anyone like me.

I kind of batted it off at the time but looking back can't help feeling that was his way of seeing how I felt? The cynical me just reckons he was after a shag!

Seriously learnt my lesson with FWB arrangements with this one...

OP posts:

IvanaPee · 27/04/2019 13:21

Ah come on! He could have sky-written it and you wouldn’t have believed him!

Let it go if you want. But it doesn’t sound like you want to...

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 27/04/2019 13:22

message him... go on!!

You know you want to. The beer last night wanted you to as well. Listen to it.

SoupDragon · 27/04/2019 13:24

but out the blue he said over msg that he missed me and hadn't met anyone like me.

I kind of batted it off at the time...

Right, so it's actually you who has made it clear there is no chance of anything.

LuckyLou7 · 27/04/2019 13:27

Love that Lucy Spraggan song

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