Family meal out issue. WIBU?

[LettuceBe]

A family member organised an extended family lunch today. We have gatherings two or three times a year. Today there were 12 adults and four children.(I don't have children so none were mine) An aunt received some unexpected money and wanted to pay for it all. It was a chain pub type place so reasonably priced but still incredibly generous of her and offers of payment from some were repeatedly refused before and during the meal.

It went well but all four children aged 2, 3, 4 and 8) barely touched their kids meals(The build your own type when you choose a main and two sides, Dessert is free) There was a huge kids play area so they were more interested in that and left the vast majority of the food. Said Aunt was not pleased and made some remarks about it having to pay for nothing. One parent didn't look pleased but offered to pay for the kids meals.(About£4.95) but Aunt declined. It created a bit of an atmosphere but we finished and left. Aunt left a Whatsapp about enjoying the day and hoping everyone else did too, but that she felt a little taken advantage of because the children didn't eat their meals and none of the other three sets of parents offered to pay for the uneaten meals. Understandably it didn't go down well.

So who was being unreasonable here?

I think the family could have said eat food together than go and play. It’s not easy with kids but I’d feel bad if mine didn’t sit and show gratitude and also respect for the food.its a shame to waste food and part of the experience is leaning to sit and enjoy each others company. Tearing around in the playground and being separate defeats the purpose.

Why was that particular venue chosen?

Location?

Parking?

Food or drinks on offer?

Play area?

Were there any discussions beforehand as to the merits or bad points of that venue or any others in the mix?

Who chose the venue?

f your planning on just letting them play then why order the food in the first place!
Maybe the kids where hungry but the excitment got too much.

2 and 3 year olds dont eat a lot.When mine where that age,id just get extra food rather than a kids meal for each of them.
Actually my kids would have ate the nachos.

In this case your Aunt has soured a nice lunch.Paying for people doesnt give you the right to bitch and moan.I wouldnt be going out with her anytime soon.And I'd send her my share of the bill.

It sounds like you should t accept any freebies from this aunt. She wanted to be nice but it’s obvious she expects things in return.

Surely the point of the meal is to all get together and chat and play? The food and eating it is secondary.

The aunt is being vvur the parents who were expecting to pay and so probably thought that it's a fiver and the kids are enjoying rare cousin time let them get on with it. Aunt offered to pay others offered to pay and she declined. She is making a unnecessary point as it wasn't her business as the parents were planning to pay. I'm sure if they knew someone else would be paying they would have made the kids eat more but surely at big family gatherings the food becomes secondary to the enjoyable atmosphere etc. Especially if its the sort of pub chain I'm thinking of.

I hate it when people offer to pay for something but then make silly points like this.

I don’t think your aunt is BU at all. The parents should be teaching their children to respect dinner times and also appreciate that someone has bought them dinner. If they sat at the table and the parents tried to get them to eat it and they didn’t then fair do’s but the parents didn’t, they let their children just run about and then eat the fun ice cream. I’d also be annoyed that their ordered an adult meal for a kid and they didn’t eat it. My son is at the stage where he is starting to eat adult meals but the rule if he needs to eat it (or at least attempt too).