AIBU or is this OTT? 5yo's Ballet show

[Emergencyblueberries]

DD is 5yo and does a weekly 30 minute ballet class. All the children in her group are 4 or 5. It mostly seems to involve skipping and running around in a circle waving a fairy wand but they all seem to enjoy it. At last weeks lesson their teacher told them they were going to do a show and that all their mummies and daddies would be able to watch. No further details given but we were told we'd get an email. The children were all very excited.

Yesterday we received a very lengthy email informing us that the dance school are putting on a show this summer at a local theatre, there will be a matinee and an evening performance on the same day. It was emphasised that all children must perform in both shows. It's on a Sunday, in term time, each performance is 2.5 hours long but they have to be at the theatre in costume and make up an hour before it starts. The evening performance doesn't finish until 9pm! DD is usually fast asleep by 7pm.

It went on to say there will be a dress rehearsal on the Friday before the show for which the children are expected to miss half a day of school and a parent must be present to chaperone them. No acknowledgement that some parents have jobs and might therefore be unable pick their DC up from school at midday, drive them to the theatre and hang around for hours on a working day. The Sunday before that there is a 4.5 hour rehearsal which finishes at 6.30pm.

It also said "each one of you is expected to volunteer to help backstage for at least one of the performances". In those words. No "please" or "we would appreciate it if you could.."

Tickets to watch the show are £16 each (is that normal for a kids dance show??) and apparently we will be recieving a bill for our child's costume/costumes in due course.

AIBU in thinking that it's completely OTT to expect this level of committment from a bunch of 4 and 5 year olds?? I realise that most of the other dancers will be older, have probably been dancing for years and are taking proper ballet exams etc. so of course for them it's different. But WIBU to tell the dance teacher I don't want DD to be in the show as I feel it's too much pressure and she'll be too tired? I don't want her to feel like she's missing out but she's usually shattered by the end of a normal week at school as it is.

Well my son wants to dance but I will be picking very carefully where he goes. He is not missing school for it. The football you have described is nothing like that in our area. The teams are all local so very little petrol cost and it starts at 9.30 so no crack of dawn. Definitely not all day.

My cousin took her daughter to a dance show thing and they were on the road at 4 and there late into the evening. I'm shocked that they miss school for a hobby.

The main thing with dance is to not get into the Festival thing. We never did festivals. Expensive costumes and competitions all over the country - no thank you!

Thye dance school dd used to attend before going to vocational school had a slightly higher class price than others in the area but all show rehearsals were included. it cost £7 per hour and they alternated between exam work and show work doing a show every two years. There was a dress rehearsal the Sunday before at no extra cost and costumes were roughly between £20-30 per dance for ballet and tap and £5-10 for contemporary/jazz etc. Tickets cost £15, the show ran over 4 nights with a Saturday matinee and the youngest children performed in the first half and were collected at the interval.

The dance school where ds goes to is cheaper £3.50 per hour but they have extra Sunday rehearsals for the shows. Costumes cost about £10-20 per costume (the dance school re-uses some stuff) and the dress rehearsal is charged at £3.50. The show runs over 3 nights with a Saturday matinee and again the youngest children are collected at the interval.

Both dance school the children had to miss a couple of hours of school if they choose to take an exam but that is no different to my children having to miss school for piano/drama exams.

DD is 5. They do a little show once a term at school for their street dance club. I wouldn't let her do what you've described tbh. It's too much. Her nativity was x3 performances, one of which didn't finish until 5.30/6 and all us mums were a bit uncomfortable with it.

Totally OTT for that age.

I’d have no problem with them missing an afternoon of school for it. It’s one afternoon and it is educational. I appreciate the logistics of it might be difficult but the missing school wouldn’t bother me at all as a very occasional thing.

My cousin took her daughter to a dance show thing and they were on the road at 4 and there late into the evening. I'm shocked that they miss school for a hobby

For some children like mine, it’s more than a hobby and it’s the start of training for their career. Although I appreciate for the vast majority this won’t apply.

She will likely want to do the show as it gets nearer though.

For some children like mine, it’s more than a hobby and it’s the start of training for their career. Although I appreciate for the vast majority this won’t apply.

The OP's daughter is 5

Take her to gymnastics instead!

YANBU

That sounds totally bonkers for 4 and 5 year olds!