Can we please discuss 'moving out of the way' for men?

[VladmirsPoutine]

I've frankly had it and have made it my mission to never move out of the way and just sort of pull my whole-self in a forward position so that it's either we're going to clash or he'll side-step out of my way.

Can I ask all you women to do the same?

I was always somehow subconsciously moving - but fuck it. The pavement is as much my right.

Gahh! Just walked back to work and a man whom I did not move out of the way for motioned me to the left but I walked straight through and thought fuck it. He then turned back to call me a bitch.

Hope everyone else is having a lovely Thursday morning!

However I attended a very big sporting event recently, the championship decider of the Six Nations. Men spectators definitely outnumber women, so I decided to play Patriarchy chicken, it was great fun and I didn't get bumped once or have any abuse for not giving way.

Which completely nullifies your point doesn't it. The men moved out of your way and you didn't get any grief. As for the slightly shocked looks, that's probably because you were staring through them and doing your 'Bittersweet Symphony' bit at a packed event where a bit of 'give and take' is essential to actually get anywhere.

Brilliant topic Vladimirs & thank you Ratonoastick for Patriarchy Chicken.

Still laughing xx

I have played this but I tend to stop rather than barge into (or yield)... perhaps I'm too chicken, but it's still effective.

It's also fun to centre, try to remain relaxed and flow through the pedestrians. That ones not a game of patriarchy, you're not admin :) to be in conflict with Jose who would never back down, you're aiming to almost dance through the spaces in a crowded and fluctuating area as quickly, smoothly and efficiently as you can. Spotting the spaces, and the cracks where if you wedge and apply a little implied pressure, it will open.

Admin, smiley face?!

*aiming to be in conflict

my preview button doeth not work

I was in London this week. Thought about this as I was walking along a narrow pavement, space only for one as I passed a seating area. I was half past the instruction already and could see a man walking towards me looking annoyed, presumably because I hadn't stepped into the road or let him go first.
The person I was with lives in London and I asked her about this, she said everyone walks into you in London if you give an inch! But she is tall and fierce.

Surely, if you're going to play 'Patriarchy Chicken' then you should yield half a person-width and THEN stand your ground otherwise you're just perpetuating what you assume to be the problem in the first place.

In addition, surely for this to be a fair test, you'd have to use the same 'beeline' strategy towards an equal number of women to determine whether it's a 'man thing' or whether it's just that a small section of society are self-entitled twats (and I think that's probably more likely the case)

Either way, it's a bit fucking stupid to risk any kind of injury just to make a point.

I usually just stop in my tracks (as my balance is usually crap, but you can't tell by looking at me)
Then people do usually look shocked to see me there!

A few years ago I read on here that if you walk with your head down, people usually move out of the way for you.
We were on our way back from holiday and I felt very very Ill, but was holding it together (barely) till we got home.
Anyway, we had called a taxi to Leeds train station, but we were at the side entrance and had to go to the back.
I held my DGD's hands and just walked through the crowd head down, didn't get bumped into once!

Also if my DC or DGC ever get barged into while out, they have been taught to say 'Excuse Me!' In as louder voice as possible! This was because they would get very upset about being walked into/knocked over and saying that gave them some power back

Did this in town. Only two men got out of the way in advance. Both from church. Not sure if that means they have worked out that I am a cantankerous arse or what.

I wasn't moving as my hips were agony and straight line was least painful.

Yeah men are bastards, never move out the way, the streets are absolutely littered with men just knocking into each other like autonomous robots.

Oh wait thats not reality, reality is basically everybody moves, men,women and children, and just like people doing the "dance" its likely that many misread the situation the other way and think someone was going to move.

Years ago when I lived in London I was walking along a road in Kensington - quite a few people about - and a man (late 20s, I'd guess) actually stopped in front of me, screaming abuse at me (mid 20s at the time), for not moving out of his way. I yelled back asking why it was my job to move for him, but I was really shaken up. It was one of those situations where every now and then people were sort of weaving in and out, so there was clearly no right or wrong. He was so abusive.

@Halloumimuffin Bittersweet Symphony video!

Very rarely does a man not side step for me. Quite often I side step as does the approaching man and we both end up side stepping the same way so share a smile.
I do tend to try and catch the eye of the approaching man so maybe that helps with them side stepping.

I've noticed this. Mainly in my gym's swimming pool. Probably because I don't walk anywhere. The manspreading there is immense. I've stopped moving out of the way when they get in, get in the line I'm swimming in and swim towards me. I'm fully prepared to stop swimming and stand there.

OP

You sound lovely. Are you ok?

Is it just me or do the majority of attitudes on here actually imply that it's not the men, but actually belligerent women who won't give an inch just to prove a point, that are actually the problem.

^ this

I work in London and have had many many 'dances'. It's usually the men who give way first ime.

I have to admit that this is not something I have ever experienced. I’ve lived in a few different cities and I’ve never noticed men expecting women to step to the side to let them past. I’ve always thought men and women are equally courteous (or rude!) with their pavement etiquette.

All you people convinced it's a definite thing among entitled men, I urge you to spend as long trying out the same thing with women. See if you end up with roughly similar results.

We're all going to have different experiences depending on things like our looks, our height, whether we look really scary or not

what's going to happen is that Mnetters will start playing chicken with each other and will end up bumping into each other

Swimming pools are a different thing entirely. I'm not going to argue with anyone about the real, unpleasantly domineering behaviour there. Usually but not always by men.

On pavements, there is more potential for eye contact, movement and mutual avoidance. It's a different environment, different phenomenon.

Back from a completely uneventful walk.

Inclined to agree with PBo83.

@Ruby789

Thankyou :)

YABU. There are just as many rude, self-important women who expect me to move out of their way as there are rude men who expect this. I don't think it's confined to gender.

And what is it called when it is rude women who expect me to move - "matriarchy chicken"?