Can we please discuss 'moving out of the way' for men?

[VladmirsPoutine]

I've frankly had it and have made it my mission to never move out of the way and just sort of pull my whole-self in a forward position so that it's either we're going to clash or he'll side-step out of my way.

Can I ask all you women to do the same?

I was always somehow subconsciously moving - but fuck it. The pavement is as much my right.

Gahh! Just walked back to work and a man whom I did not move out of the way for motioned me to the left but I walked straight through and thought fuck it. He then turned back to call me a bitch.

Hope everyone else is having a lovely Thursday morning!

YES! I do this sometimes when I remember. Yesterday walking back to work after lunch I had no choice as a guy walking towards me was forcing me to either stop in my tracks or walk straight into a sign. So sick of it!

@SoupDragon It isn't so much a reason to behave like a twat in public as it is more about male entitlement. And my 'solid' stance stops even just one man from believing he has more right to the pavement than I do then so be it.

I don't hate men. I just want to break down the patriarchy in manageable ways. I'm not some 'little woman' and I won't move out of the way for some self-aggrandising man.

To those saying it's not just men - do you ever see two men doing the 'I move, you move' dance? Nope, just women being polite and deferential as taught

No I’m just getting on with my shit so don’t notice, I over think so always have a zillion things running through my head.

However if I’m pushing dd in a trolly I don’t move out of the way for man woman or beast - I’m a like a high speed bullet train on a mission.

I’m a fast walker.

hate moving out of the way for people who then don’t say thank you, I always mutter you’re welcome cunt under my breath- never quite brave enough to say it out loud.

My favourite response to someone not saying thank you is "I'll just got fuck myself" under my breath but just loud enough for them to hear but think they've misheard

I'm with you OP. A tip: Put your elbows out. It gives them a jolt and reduces impact on your body.

My only rule is that if the person approaching is weaker than me, then I move...if they're bigger/stronger/younger then they can bloody move.

So I shift for the elderly or disabled and kids.

Men...big, strong men...FUCK OF out of my path.

I'm not some 'little woman' and I won't move out of the way for some self-aggrandising man.

I'm not some little woman either (and why use woman as an insult?). However, I'll still move my 50% out of the way of anyone.

I used to guide my child so they were in front if we needed to pass

Yes I me too

To those saying it's not just men - do you ever see two men doing the 'I move, you move' dance?

well.. yes actually.

I find men are much more likely to move out of my way than women, or just as likely to be engrossed in their phone and not paying attention to anything.
What an odd thread.

I usually move round people, because I'm quick on my feet and it's easy for me to do. I haven't really noticed it being a male/female thing, to be honest, and nor do I really care.

also hate it when couples/groups do it and have adopted a policy that the only time I will step into the road is where the path can only accommodate two people and one of those is obviously reliant on the other - so someone with a disability, a small child holding an adult hand etc. Everyone else, couples, friends, teenagers, people with prams can get to fuck.

^This. Me too.

FFS! What is so difficult to understand? It's not about moving to be 'polite' or 'getting on with your day' - it's a fundamental feminist issue. I've held many doors open so men could pass through - I've offered up my paid seat on trains for men. THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

I live in a southern state (originally from London). Here men will step out of the way and say hello ma’am and ask how I am. So much nicer

When someone is making a beeline for me and not looking properly I sometimes step behind a post or other pavement furniture and see if they bump into it.

My favourite response to someone not saying thank you is "I'll just got fuck myself" under my breath but just loud enough for them to hear but think they've misheard

This is me but for some bizarre reason I end up saying ‘thank you’ to them

My pet peeve is some one holding a door open for me when I’m ages away so then I feel obliged to start trotting to the door, then get really pissed of wity them and myself for doing it

@SoupDragon If you think I am using 'woman' as an insult then please report this thread and have me banned.

I haven’t found it to be a gender or age thing. Sometimes people are preoccupied and sometimes they are rude and entitled. I have noticed and tried to figure it out as I am a smallish lady. I do notice that generally car drivers tend to follow the same “rules” when walking. If they are on the left, no movement. If they are in the center they often move left etc. (Noticed this as I used to drive on the other side and my natural instinct was to move the other way and caused disruptions and annoyance at times).

I don't hate men. I just want to break down the patriarchy in manageable ways.

IMO you're not doing the cause any good posting stuff like this.

It makes you look petty and as a knock on effect, makes it look like that age old bloody misnomer, that we are all 'men haters'.

Waterloo Station has to be THE world place for this. It's like the Hunger Games during rush hour.

*worst

Right, lived and worked in London for the last 25 years and I absolutely haven't noticed this. I'm fairly aware of my surroundings though, and I like to think I'm fairly polite, so maybe I am just moving out of people's way on autopilot. I am very much going to take note of this behaviour (or non-behaviour) in future though. I don't think I encounter as much rudeness as some people report (although train behaviour...that can be something else).

"However if I’m pushing dd in a trolly I don’t move out of the way for man woman or beast - I’m a like a high speed bullet train on a mission. "

oh I HATE this. The number of times I've been out with my elderly mother and have to stop and stand in front of her because the person with the pram is literally going to run her down. Why do you do it? Arse.

I suppose it's the same reason men do this - I do definitely understand Patriarchy Chicken. On my own, I can obviously play and find that refusing to move and then smiling at them is doubly confusing for them. But we all have to be careful or it's the Putney jogger all over again.

it's a fundamental feminist issue.

not really no, it's your own issue.
Haven't witnessed any gender related rudeness on that one!

My ex never used to make space for others on the pavement. Ever. Never even occurred to him as far as I could tell: he wasn't trying to make a point.

I did some improv theatre and this came up under the heading of "status". Little things that we aren't even aware of tell others what status we have, and they adjust to that, also without realising it. So if two high-status people meet in the street they both automatically dominate the pavement and might clash, whereas people of different statuses will have it easier as one automatically gets out of the other's way.

The signs of status, according to this theory, are little things like whether you keep your legs wide apart, chest out and your hands loose (highg status) or if you tend to be more hunched into yourself, with your hands tight in and closer to your face.

I don't think I can say it's been gender based for me - it's usually people who wouldn't think of moving out of the way for anyone. Old, young, local, tourist, male, female...

I get pissed off with mobility scooters that think I should step in the road rather than wait for someone in front of them on 'their' side of the pavement.