Most embarrassing moment at work

[HeidiBoo1984]

I love embarrassing moment threads and I'm always embarrassing myself beyond belief at work.

I have endometriosis and it often sends my bowels wild. Our office toilets are basically just within the office, rooms rather than cubicles, and our office, which is more or less open plan with about 8 of us, it's a quiet environment so you can hear everything. Anyway, I've many a time been to the toilet for just a wee and then unexpectedly farted really loudly. I die inside and consider just getting my coat and going home! No one ever says anything, but they must hear!

Does anyone else have any embarrassing stories at work?

[Jebuschristchocolatebar]

Worked on a document for my very old fashioned gentleman of a manager. Took it home to work and back in my bag the next day. Handed it to hi and about ten mins later he handed me back a green always ultra (unused in its wrapper) which was in the pages of the document. It must have been in my bag. I DIED

[RussellSprout]

I just started a new job, and managed to get two people completely confused. It was not my first day there, as I work out of a different office, but support another office which it was my first time visiting.

This is despite the fact that person one picked me up from the train station and gave me a guided tour. I then an hour with person one going through their part of the business.

I later on had to send a very confidential email to person one and managed to somehow in my brain, transpose a completely different person whose name I did not even know, onto who I thought in my head was person one.

This second person had some similarities looks wise but they were not identical twins FFS. They even worked in a different part of the building!

I then went to person 2 and asked if they'd seen the email I sent. As they were replying, a small part of my brain began to think maybe it was not the same person but I was not sure and still thought it was probably person one. They asked to see the email, luckily (very luckily) I styled it out as I slowly became aware I was speaking to someone completely different. I think he realised.. but didn't say anything.

Then I went to the loos to do Edvard Munch's 'the scream'.

[starsurge]

Not quite something that happened at work, but close enough.

Sometime last Thursday, I was on the phone with my broker for reasons, and out of sheer habit, ended the call with "love you, goodnight". Really looking forward to our next conversation/meeting. 🙄

[RosaWaiting]

had to move some stuff when office was being redecorated

boss designated someone to help, a man I didn't know well.

I went to his bit of the office and said "right, so you and I need to find a cupboard".

[BluebellCockleshell123]

We had an external company in to give us some training in a small training room. I was the only female.

I picked up my bag upside down and everything fell out. I had stayed ay my boyfriend's the night before and it turned out that the only contents of my bag were

1. tampons
   
2. condoms
   
3. knickers
   
   3 of my male colleagues were crawling on the floor to retrieve the tampons that had rolled to every corner of the room. There was open hilarity and I was pretty much hysterical through embarrassed laughter.
   
   One of my colleagues returned a tampon to me several hours later when I was back at my desk as he "didn't know that else to do with it "!!!!
   
   They still talk about it nearly 20 years later.

[ToastyFingers]

I called a large hairy male customer 'princess' last week. In my defence, my two little DDs like it and I was very tired.

[FrozenMargarita17]

I used to work somewhere really hot and I had STUPIDLY worn a silky shirt which then had massive sweat patches. Someone walked in on me drying my pits under the hand dryer - I was in such a weird position hahaha. I cringe to this day.

[BreconBeBuggered]

Toasty

[Myextensionisgivingmeaheadache]

I am absolutely dying at these. So so funny.

Well done and keep it up.

[Hoppinggreen]

Glad my “need a wee” story amused
Same company, been there a few years by now
Big boss from America comes over and we are standing at the buffet making small,talk. All of a sudden he holds out a sandwich towards me and says “what do you think is in this one?” For some reason I took a big bite out of it, leaving him with half a sandwich in his hand and a look of horror on his face. I instantly realised what I had done but managed to swallow it and squeak out “ham”
He walked off and never spoke to me again.
I did survive 3 rounds of redundancy at that company though, they probably just kept me as some sort of jester to amuse people at meetings!

[StarlaP]

After staying home for ten years raising my kids I managed to get a short term position with a small local security company doing admin to ease me back into the workplace whilst I looked for something permanent. On my first day they were holding a meeting which the boss asked me to sit in on to get a feel for the business and learn a bit about what they do. They were only a small team of 5, but even so I felt very intimidated. The boss asked who would like to lead the meeting, cue awkward silences around the table.. it obviously wasn’t a popular job. I thought it would be an ice breaker to loudly proclaim ‘I’ll do it!’ The boss didn’t appreciate my attempt at humour but the remaining team members collapsed into hysterics, one guy even snorted snot out all onto his paperwork. I was immediately appalled at myself and couldn’t believe I’d done it.

Another time I went to a club opening with some friends to show support for our acquaintance who’s club it was. I also happened to find him rather attractive. Early on in the night i needed to go the loo, and did a massive number 2 and I was mortified when I flushed but it just filled the toilet up with water and my poo was floating around on top. I faffed a bit trying to fix it and couldn’t so I attempted to flee the scene.. when I opened the door he was just walking in with a plunger. He apologised to me for coming in there and said he’d just had a report than a toilet was blocked, and went to the one next to mine. I was a bit relieved and said something about not being able to use the one I’d just come out of as it was also blocked and tried to scurry away quickly.. then my mate walked in the loos and insisted on helping him unblock them before the club filled up properly so I just stood there while my mate and the bloke I fancied attacked the bog id just blocked up while my giant poo kept nudging into their (gloved) hands and my mate kept loudly complaining about people being dirty bastards. I’ve never wanted to die more!

[floribunda18]

I bet he loved it too really, Toasty.

[RunSweatLaughAndLatte]

Omg HoppingGreen, that is hilarious!!! That's the sort of thing I would do

Thanks MN, been feeling horrendously ill today and this has brought light to my day!

[Mildmanneredmum]

My colleague used to scoot about on his office chair (they were all on wheels) to talk to other colleagues at their desks. I thought he looked really cool doing it, so tried it myself, scooted to the next desk, only a wheel got caught somehow and I ended up being tipped into the waste paper bin. Everyone just stared.....

[sam221]

Some of these are hilarious! I have a habit of falling over every so often and am skilled at picking myself and scuttling away. Anyway one occasion a few years ago, I had a client meeting in a 'nice' restaurant- as i was walking across to get to our table, i fell in front of everyone. I wanted to the earth to open up and drag me in. I was helped up and fussed over-which made it worse!

[MaMisled]

I started work in a very plush nursing home. First day, my photo was on front page of local paper, a pile of which were sitting on reception table. I'd been unwittingly involved in a car theft!(genuinely had no idea new bf had stolen it!). Not one person noticed! Phew!

I bled all over a new pale blue chair, (ghastly period) first night shift of another new job. Scrubbed it in a dim light. Next morning at handover I could see I hadn't done a very good job! Everyone avoided it and it was excruciating. I never owned up!

[TallulahBetty]

...I ended up being tipped into the waste paper bin

stop, stop...i can't take any more

[haverhill]

Recently I started using baby powder instead of dry shampoo on a friend’s advice. A few weeks ago I got some funny looks in the staff kitchen whilst getting my morning coffee. It wasn’t until later I realised I’d forgotten to brush it out and had drifts of white powder all over my head.

[XXcstatic]

Have probably posted this before, but I used to work for a company with a paging system that was broadcast throughout the building - like the ones they have on TV US hospital dramas - 'paging Dr X' etc.

A new guy started, his mate rang on his office phone (pre-mobile era) to ask how it was going. New guy launches into a no-holds barred description of everyone in the office, how much he fancies his secretary, exactly why his boss is an arse. Unfortunately, he'd pressed the wrong button and the whole lot was broadcast throughout the building. And, as he was new, not many people recognised his voice, so no one could find him to warn him.

He was transferred to another branch within the month

[FookMeFookYou]

I used to work in retail years ago and we sold shoes among other things. One day this guy came in with his wife and kids and said "I was wondering if you sold larger size shoes here, I'm a size 13 and can't get them anywhere" (this was before the days of big n tall being easily catered for) so my colleague said "no sorry we only go up to a size 12". That should have been that, bye bye Mr Big feet. But no they stick around and he went on for around 5 mins about his size 13 feet. After they eventually left I turned my back and said loudly to my colleagues "I think we all know why he was going on about his size 13's" nudge nudge wink wink and my colleagues just stared at me and nodded towards the door. The guy had returned because his kid had left something behind. I WAS MORTIFIED Luckily he saw the funny side and laughed it off. Thankfully he didn't ask to speak to the manager on duty... because it was me!!

[sirmione16]

Pregnant. Producing extra saliva (a symptom no one mentions!) friend came into work with her lovely dog, I bent over and starting baby talking to the dog, dribbled down all over the dogs head. Visibly. Had to slurp and wipe my mouth and tried to laugh it off. She wiped the dogs head trying to make it look like she was just patting him. Kill me now.

[Cheeseandapple]

I worked in an open plan office. Took a call that needed to transfer to a colleague so just stood up at my desk and flailed my arms about to get their attention and see if they wanted to take the call. When I sat down I realised the buttons on my shirt had all popped open and I'd been standing there basically just in my bra.


At another job some coeagues had just told me how nice my trousers were and I went on about how I only buy work trousers at zara as know they're good quality. Next thing I did was bend over to pick something off the floor and my trousers ripped from the zip all the way round to the other side. It was first thing in the morning and I had to borrow gym shorts for the rest of the day...

[Knittedfairies]

I was in a pub a few years ago and needed to visit the Ladies. I think the place was last refurbished when God were a lad so the cistern was one of those high up types with a chain. I may have yanked the chain too hard and pulled the cistern away from the wall, resulting in a shower of water spilling onto the floor. I 'fessed up at the bar, before returning to my table, slightly damp.

[poorbuthappy]

A customer rang whilst the office were in the middle of talking about their project - so yes I actually said to the customer, we are having a mass debate about this now...

[Justonemorepancake]

Wasn't me but I gleefully remember someone sending round a meme of a picture of David Dickinson with 'bargain Cunt' writ large underneath. Can't even remember the context. But he sent it to the whole company instead of a singular person. A company with hundreds of employees with offices globally. I was crying with laughter as he pegged it to IT's desk (next to mine) to see if he could 'cancel' it. He could not. It had repurcussions for weeks but he kept his job.