Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To only take 1 of our 2 DC to Disneyland Paris

150 replies

Lifeonmars77 · 13/03/2019 14:16

DS1 is 7 years old, a massive Disney fan, loves characters, rides, LOVES shows. Very placid, well behaved and a good traveller.

DS2 is 2 and a half, hates travelling, will not go on rides (not even the little toddler ones), hates anyone dressed up in a character costume.... just screams, is a nightmare in queues, hates holding hands/reins/wrist straps and loves running off!

We are planning a 3 day trip to Disneyland Paris in August. WIBU to just take DS1 this time? I don't want to send the message that he is more important but, if we are going to spend that amount of money on the trip, it would be a shame if he didn't get the most out of it.

If we did this, we would look to take DS2 on a separate trip, maybe when DS1 is in school, maybe a zoo, cbeebies land etc.

All things considered, it makes the most sense but I can't help feeling horrible about it Sad

WWYD?

OP posts:
Merryoldgoat · 13/03/2019 14:20

I would never take a 2 year old to a theme park.

I think it's fine to just take the older one.

definitelynotanothernamechange · 13/03/2019 14:20

Logistically does that mean one parent stays home with the youngest? Would it not be nicer for everyone to go and do some things DS1 likes and some things that DS2 would like?
What would the equivalent of 3 days in disneyland be for DS2?

moreismore · 13/03/2019 14:21

Honestly, I would wait a couple of years and go when they’ll both enjoy it. I wouldn’t want to run the risk of either feeling jealous of the other’s trip. And 2.5 is old enough to only care that they are being left behind but not really to understand why...

12thofnever · 13/03/2019 14:22

I don’t think I could do it.
When you get back and DS1 is talking about what a great time he had, I think DS2 would still feel left out despite the fact that you know he wouldn’t have really enjoyed it that much?

Original poster
Lifeonmars77 · 13/03/2019 14:22

Sorry I meant to say grandparents have offered to have DS2 while we are away. They look after him 2 days a week when I'm working and he has a sleepover there at least once a fortnight so it wouldn't be unusual for him and unlikely he'd feel left behind.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 13/03/2019 14:24

i Think with those cicrcumstsnces I would.

You can take the youngest somewhere special when they are a similar age.

ErickBroch · 13/03/2019 14:25

I came here to say YABU as my dad took my half-brother and not me when I was a child and I was so upset.

However at 2 YANBU, definitely go for it!

whatsnewchoochoo · 13/03/2019 14:26

As long as the little one gets something special too it's fine. And if you happy to return when they want to go when older

I took my nephew but not niece at the same age. They're 17 and 13 now. She doesn't care - never liked Disney, isn't bothered she didn't go (is now angling for an individual trip to New York though Grin)

ThreeBagsFullofWool · 13/03/2019 14:26

I would go ahead with the plans, the younger one will hate it so no need to feel guilty.

SnuggyBuggy · 13/03/2019 14:27

I'd do it. I think when you have an age gap between DC it's inevitable that there will be some separate trips and outings so I wouldn't feel guilty.

adaline · 13/03/2019 14:29

Do it. By the time the younger one is 7, the oldest will be 12 so you can do the same (or an equivalent trip) for him.

MontanaSky · 13/03/2019 14:30

I'd do it. Especially as GP have offered to have your 2yr old.

Acunningruse · 13/03/2019 14:31

I definitely couldn't do this, and I am generally the first to say 2 year olds are clueless in many aspects- world book day dress up for a 2yo anyone?!Hmm

But I also have a 2.5 year old and she would be so aware of this. Presumably by August he'll be closer to 3 so even more aware?

I also have a 6.5yo so similar gap and I get how frustrating it is when on a day out the eldest wants to run on ahead whilst the toddler spends 10 minutes looking at some gravel. Plus nap issues if they still nap.

In your position I would wait and go early next year so a year from now when they'll be walking longer distances or if you were wedded to going in August I would take pushchair and a mountain of snacks to bribe then to stay init.

Sirzy · 13/03/2019 14:33

I also have a 6.5yo so similar gap and I get how frustrating it is when on a day out the eldest wants to run on ahead whilst the toddler spends 10 minutes looking at some gravel. Plus nap issues if they still nap.

You see to me this is a reason to do it the way the OP is planning.

Otherwise the eldest is always going to feel they missed out because of the age gap and had to change their days out as a result of being the eldest.

A chance to go and enjoy things without the sibling will be nice for them.

TVandToast · 13/03/2019 14:34

I'd feel horrible about it as you said you do but it makes complete sense to just take your older one as it sounds like your younger one would hate most parts of it.

I would bring lots of presents back for the younger one. And then spoil him when I got home because I'd probably still feel bad even though he will probably have had a great time with his grandparents.

If you oldest son was a bit younger I would have suggested waiting a while to see if the younger ones gets better with travelling, queues and other things but then your 7 year old may lose the interest in all things Disney in the next year or so....so I think you should just go with your eldest.

We are programmed to feel guilty as parents I think! Have a great time.

Hollowvictory · 13/03/2019 14:34

I would not take the toddler! You're making the right decision

thatwhichwecallarose · 13/03/2019 14:35

I don’t know what I would do. Wouldn’t rule it out, but I like family time to include all of us.

How much are you even saving by not taking 2 yo? Most DLP packages are kids go free anyway, certainly they wouldn’t cost an extra room.

Floralnomad · 13/03/2019 14:37

I think it’s fine to take just the older one if you know the younger one will not enjoy it at the moment . We also have a 6.5 yr age gap but both of ours loved Disney so we always took them both and do have some lovely photos of them with the various characters . Hope you have a lovely time .

DanglyBangly · 13/03/2019 14:40

I would. He won’t know much about it and what he does know, he’ll have forgotten in about a fortnight.

Purplejay · 13/03/2019 14:40

I would give it a year or two and take both.

If you do decide to take one child now, don’t assume they will be happy to be excluded if you decide to take your second child. I don’t think, well you went when you were 7 will wash.

underneaththeash · 13/03/2019 14:41

I think that's fine. We don't take DH to Disneyworld as he hates it and is very moany (and yes, I mean DH rather than DS!).

WishIwas19again · 13/03/2019 14:42

A 2.5 year old won't understand Disneyworld is amd what they're missing, only that you have gone away.

I think if you make it sound special they're going to spend one on one time with grandparents this time, and will get to do something another time it will be fine

otherwise can you/DP stay behind and spend quality time with your youngest, then they get to do the Disney Trip with them at an older age?

UtterlyUnimaginativeUsername · 13/03/2019 14:42

YANBU. We brought a 2.9 year old and it wasn't pretty.

woodcutbirds · 13/03/2019 14:42

Definitely do it. When the younger one is that age, he can have his own trip there too. One-to-ones doing stuff one of yoru DC especially likes are a brilliant way of bonding.

Alsohuman · 13/03/2019 14:44

Just take the older one, the youngest will have a much better time being spoilt by their grandparents.

Swipe left for the next trending thread