Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that my friend has lied to me for money?

333 replies

AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 15:23

A month ago, my friend decided that it'd be a good idea for us two to go on an overseas trip in April for "old time's sake" (we were very close during our uni years). I agreed, and sent £500 to her bank account to cover for my share of the lodging (payment was all supposed to be done online).

Fast forward to today, trip is cancelled since she "doesn't feel like going anymore". Okay, no problem. Asked her to transfer me the money, and she can't because she's "only got cash at the moment" and she wondered if I could "wait till Friday".

AIBU to be suspicious about this? If she was planning to book everything as per our agreement, why would she even withdraw the money in the first place? I don't want to sound like the paranoid/untrusting friend so haven't said anything to her beyond an "Oh, okay thanks".

OP posts:
FriarTuck · 02/03/2019 15:24

Well your second mistake was not saying 'sorry I need the money back sooner - suggest you bank the cash and transfer it'.

Shootfirstaskquestionslater · 02/03/2019 15:25

All sounds very dodgy to me I don’t think there ever was a trip planned she just wanted the money. Make sure you get it back off her.

Barrenfieldoffucks · 02/03/2019 15:26

Well, I'd just ask that...where the £500 has gone?

Holidayshopping · 02/03/2019 15:27

Say no-it can’t wait.

Original poster
AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 15:28

Well, I'd just ask that...where the £500 has gone?

She says she has it all in cash and can only bank it later in the week cause she's "busy".

OP posts:
Barrenfieldoffucks · 02/03/2019 15:28

Or if she is nearby, just say that cash is fine so you'll pop round tomorrow

HollowTalk · 02/03/2019 15:28

I think she needed a loan, OP. Did you ever see proof that she'd made a booking?

HollowTalk · 02/03/2019 15:29

Why would she have it in cash anyway?

Anothertempusername · 02/03/2019 15:29

I would've asked for it back via a bank transfer. And if she says she can't, ask why on Earth she withdrew your cash??

RedHatsDoNotSuitMe · 02/03/2019 15:30

Eeeek. This doesn't sound good!

AintNobodyHereButUsReindeer · 02/03/2019 15:31

Yeah did you see proof of the booking? And if your money was for the trip, why did she even withdraw it?

areyoubeingserviced · 02/03/2019 15:34

I don’t think that you will be getting that money back anytime soon.
She will come up with another excuse on Friday

Original poster
AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 15:37

I think she needed a loan, OP. Did you ever see proof that she'd made a booking?

At the time nothing was booked yet. She was supposed to be the trip-organiser/planner and the £500 was for her to pay for our lodging in case she didn't have enough in her account (she's using a debit card, not credit). The plan was for her to show me the receipt once she's done and then she'll return or I'll top up the amount depending.

Why would she have it in cash anyway?

This is my biggest question!!!

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 02/03/2019 15:39

I would ask if you could come pick up the cash in that case.
But yes it sounds dodgy and I’d be worried. Did she send you a link of where she was booking or just that she needed £500 for generic accom? Because most people don’t ask for money until they’ve found somewhere and are about to book. Did she not think it weird that she didn’t confirm she had booked it at the time?

cstaff · 02/03/2019 15:43

Oh this doesn't sound good OP. I know you did it in good faith and with no reason to doubt her. Just tell her you will call around to collect it shortly and see how she reacts.

theworldistoosmall · 02/03/2019 15:46

I would message her back - why Friday when you could put the money back in the account on Monday and transfer me then.

Original poster
AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 15:47

Did she send you a link of where she was booking or just that she needed £500 for generic accom?

She sent me a link; my total share was going to be £490. Caught me right at the beginning of what was going to be a terribly busy week at work so I transferred her the money and she said she'd send the receipt afterwards.

Two days later she told me she reconsidered cause the location wasn't ideal but that she'd take care of it and find something better so I just left the money with her.

OP posts:
BumbleBeee69 · 02/03/2019 15:49

She spent your money.

Purplecatshopaholic · 02/03/2019 15:51

Is she really a friend?? This sounds Dodgy As.....

Original poster
AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 15:53

I would ask if you could come pick up the cash in that case.

She lives 30 minutes away. Just sent a text asking if she'll be home tomorrow (tried calling but no reply) so we'll see.

OP posts:
BlueMerchant · 02/03/2019 15:55

Can you go and pick up the cash?
Have you asked her why she took the money out?
Even if I couldn't pick it up I would tell her I was on my way,a friend had offered me a lift as going to her area.This may force her to be honest about what she has done with your money.

BlueMerchant · 02/03/2019 15:55

Sorry cross-post

EyeOfTheTigger · 02/03/2019 15:58

Does your friend live far from you OP? If she's not to far I'd call her bluff and say you'll be round to collect the cash. Don't let her get away with the "too busy" line. Reply back to her that he needs to find time because it's a lot of money and you need it back before Friday.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 02/03/2019 15:58

Why would it now be in cash? Confused

ThatssomebadhatHarry · 02/03/2019 16:00

I wouldn’t ask if she is free I would just turn up!