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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that my friend has lied to me for money?

333 replies

AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 15:23

A month ago, my friend decided that it'd be a good idea for us two to go on an overseas trip in April for "old time's sake" (we were very close during our uni years). I agreed, and sent £500 to her bank account to cover for my share of the lodging (payment was all supposed to be done online).

Fast forward to today, trip is cancelled since she "doesn't feel like going anymore". Okay, no problem. Asked her to transfer me the money, and she can't because she's "only got cash at the moment" and she wondered if I could "wait till Friday".

AIBU to be suspicious about this? If she was planning to book everything as per our agreement, why would she even withdraw the money in the first place? I don't want to sound like the paranoid/untrusting friend so haven't said anything to her beyond an "Oh, okay thanks".

OP posts:
TwinkleTits70 · 02/03/2019 16:00

Thirty minutes is nothing, I'd be popping round and asking for it as she has it all in cash.

Ellapaella · 02/03/2019 16:01

It's all bollocks isn't it? There's no way she'd have needed to take all that money out in cash for the holiday - she's spent it and doesn't have it now. Obviously waiting until she's getting paid or for someone else to give her some money before she can return it to you.
This isn't what friends do.. I'd call her out on it, she is a CF.
If you don't get it by Friday what will you do?

sonjadog · 02/03/2019 16:04

Sounds very suspicious to me. I would tell her I will be over to get it as you can't wait until Friday.

Overtheborder · 02/03/2019 16:07

Tell her you're driving past her house later and will call in for your money.

CinammonPorridge · 02/03/2019 16:08

I would cancel seeing her and wait until Friday for her to return the cash as promised.

I would under no circumstances lend this friend any money again as she has no right to spend it on anything else which she
has obviously done. I would say she is irresponsible.

I would be very angry if she did not return it.

billybagpuss · 02/03/2019 16:08

It does sound like you've been had

Original poster
AppleCrisps · 02/03/2019 16:08

To everyone asking why it's in cash that's exactly the most baffling point for me too!

Exact text I sent 5+ minutes ago was: "Hey, I'll be somewhere near your place tomorrow so I was wondering if you'd be home? I could just come and collect the cash and save you the trouble."

Next text from me as well: "Why do you have it in cash though lol"

OP posts:
Whynham · 02/03/2019 16:11

Well if she has it in cash she can give you the cash can't she? Go round and pick it up.

ChakiraChakra · 02/03/2019 16:12

I'd just turn up.

It does sound very dodgy Sad

HollowTalk · 02/03/2019 16:14

Has she a history of being broke or borrowing and not returning money?

HappyGoGoLucky · 02/03/2019 16:15

Tell her if she doesn't give you your money back then you'll file a claim and she'll get a CCJ. It might stop her in her tracks and she will probably give you the money back straightaway. Regardless of whether or not she needed it for something else, it is NOT her money and she needs to give it back to you.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 02/03/2019 16:15

The cash thing is bollocks, she’s not got the money and by saying it’s in cash gives her an excuse to why she can’t transfer it.

OP say you’re calling round for your cash.

SinkGirl · 02/03/2019 16:16

I am certain she will make an excuse - she doesn’t have it

Fishwifecalling · 02/03/2019 16:16

Mmm
Do you have any other reason to think she's untrustworthy

Aprilshowersarecomingsoon · 02/03/2019 16:16

One of the school dm's insisted she be the one to collect leavers plans cash for the July celebrations - in March... £30 each off 10 dms.
Came to the week of leaving and nowt was booked!
She had fleeced us and used our cash. She did put it back and paid for the relevant plans 2 days before school finished!
You have been had op.
I predict she will be burgled during the night...

PreseaCombatir · 02/03/2019 16:17

Dodgy as fuck. I’d just turn up lol.
But then tbh, doubt she’d open the door!!
Fucking odd, but I’d be willing to bet she attempts to turn it round on you, being right blasé ‘why are you stressing out so much, I told you I’d give it back next week, your making me feel like a criminal when I haven’t done anything wrong’ blah blah blah.
Make sure she doesn’t keep ignoring/avoiding I’d be fuming

TitsAndTomatoes · 02/03/2019 16:18

Turn up on her doorstep.
Dont care what her excuses are. She sounds like a twat

drinkygin · 02/03/2019 16:18

Yep half an hour isn’t far to drive. Turn up at her house “I’ll have my cash back please!”.

werideatdawn · 02/03/2019 16:19

I don't think you're going to get your money back..

MrsFrankCastle · 02/03/2019 16:23

She needed some cash, and has used you. She doesn't seem like a great friend

Sassysolly08 · 02/03/2019 16:24

That's a bit sinister! Why would your friend have withdrawn the money in the first place if it was for bookings etc; the fact she has drawn it out means she's intent on using it for something else unless it's been specified that bookings need to be in 'cash'. All the same, I think I'd want to just go collect it and get my 'cash back' off her. I'd want to know more to why it was withdrawn. If it was a lie and she needed the money I'd well and truly have it out with her and ask why she felt she had to lie and STEAL from me when she could have honestly just asked you for help if that is the case. Friday may be too late and your money may be gone! If your friend does not have a valid reason for withdrawing your money then I'd seriously reconsider the friendship!

Sassysolly08 · 02/03/2019 16:26

Don't steal when you can ask. Don't pay back don't bother coming back

ChrisPrattsFace · 02/03/2019 16:27

She’ll give you an excuse if she’s already said she’s too busy to bank it! Just turn up and ask for it back! Grin

CallMeWoman · 02/03/2019 16:27

30 minute drive is the other side of town for me. Pop round tonight op!

HomeMadeMadness · 02/03/2019 16:28

I would tell her to give you the money immediately. Point out she wouldn't have taken your £500 out of her account so she'll be able to transfer it right back to you.

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