Office brew making drama... AIBU?

[Katlow]

So I'm an office manager in an office of 5 people.
3 of us (aged - 24 - 39) often make each other and the other 2 members of staff brews because we want one ourselves.
We have 2 younger members of staff (19-21) who literally NEVER get up to make a brew but always accept them when someone offers them one.
Sometimes, the directors will walk in and ask someone to make them a brew, generally addressing everyone. The 2 younger members of staff were apprentices last year (but are now full paid members of staff) and hardly ever make any brews so it is always kind of expected that they'll do it. There's always an awkward minute where no one stands up to the point that sometimes I have to say Is someone doing (director) a brew or what?! but the majority of the time, one of the 2 get up and do them.
There's a member of my team who wants me to mention the fact that they never make brews. I've told him that really, I can't give someone a telling off for something that they've not been asked to do or not been directly asked to do and it's annoying but a bit of a non-issue. If they were asked and refused, that's a different matter. We do them off our own backs because we want one ourselves and it's only polite to offer everyone else. He's growing more and more resentful towards the 2 younger members and I've just told him to let it go and laugh it off. Now he's complaining that one of them sings to the radio too much, we all always hum under our breath but in my eyes I see it as the lads happy doing his job having a bit of a sing song, it's not effecting any of our work so let him be cheerful, we are all guilty of doing it sometimes. I've said he's probably letting this get to him because he's resentful towards the brew making situation.
I started working in this office as an apprentice and was constantly nit-picked at for daft things such as not talking enough, not saying peoples names when I was talking to them and other things which I just thought were pathetic. I used to hate it and go home crying (I was 18) and was constantly looking for something else. My office manager at the time then left and I took over her role and I don't want to make anyone feel the same way that she made me feel.
It's got to the point now where no one will make a brew while these 2 younger member of staff are in the office because they don't want to make those 2 one.
In my eyes, this all seems a bit silly. Should I be saying something to the 2 younger members of staff? It just seems a bit... pathetic really...

I know how long it takes to make a drink op, that wasn't my point. At least 6 drinks a day, and assuming the director comes in part way through the day then it will be more than 6 drinks each. That's an awful lot. Perhaps there's a caffine related reason for the tension. ;)

I am surprised at those who see it as a big deal to make tea for the Directors.
I have come across some young adults in the last few years like the ones in your office. I don't remember it being an issue in the past. I would tell them it is basic workplace etiquette.

What a drama.
In my early days of working, we would have a tea lady who came around with the cart during the day. But, she was paid. Tea lady was not in our position descriptions so no one ever did what you describe, it seems very odd. Over the years the tea lady went by the wayside and coffee carts made an appearance and then someone would take orders on a post it and bring back for all, no schedule to it and I’m sure it all worked out in the wash. Apart from this if we wanted a cuppa we would just make our own when we had a spare second which was considered perfectly normal thank goodness.

In my company the directors usually make tea for us if they are getting one

Just tell each person to make their own 'brew' if they need one!
You will find that it adds up to quite a considerable time out of the office not doing actual work if someone is making 5 or 6 brews on a regular basis.
Then there's toilet breaks from drinking all the brews, plus the cigarette breaks.

You don't need to have loads of brews a day to make a happy office environment!

it is pathetic

if you can stay out of it, I would. But I would also say, don't impose a rota. "make your own" is so much easier.

I know London! I'm so grateful to work where I do after this, a genuinely cohesive environment and culture. we sometimes make others a drink, sometimes not, there's a colleague who has probably had 50 drinks off me and she's never made me one.......none of us have the time or the inclination to be arsed about who's round it is. We offer a drink because we want to do a nice thing for each other, not because we expect one back.

I would tell them it is basic workplace etiquette.

Well, I’m not sure that it is.
I have never encountered this in over 30 years of working life. That’s been in a variety of environments; hospitals, government offices, private sector offices, all with different canteen/kitchenette/coffee and tea making set ups. If I had someone basically demand I do this they would get a two word response. If my manager or above asked me to do this I would be very concerned and ask them what was wrong with their hands. However, as I said I have never come across such a situation.

Make your own drinks. Don't make drinks for anyone else. Don't expect anyone else to make drinks for you. Whoever you are.

Yes, this.

the directors will walk in and ask someone to make them a brew, generally addressing everyone
The directors need to be reminded that they are perfectly capable of making their own bloody drinks. I cannot stand people who think that seniority of role means you need to be waited on hand and foot.

My first 'proper' job was full of stupid office politics about tea rotas and other petty shit, and it was always the same group of staff who made drama out of nothing. The fact that other staff did not give a toss seemed to make them even more determined to create fuss. I remember full staff meetings where bullshit about tea rounds and birthday collections and fridge space got as much time and attention as actual business. This stuff is not what we go to work to do. It's daft to make an issue out of it.

Your complaining colleague needs reminding to focus on their job and to grow the fuck up a bit.

If it bothers Mr Moaner that much he should say something. You’re in a round so all on an equal pegging.
My manager regularly says ‘are you making a brew?’ Or ‘I fancy a brew and it’s your round.’
Equally I’ll say the same to him if it’s his turn.

Pavlova I was talking about taking turns to make drinks if your workplace does rounds. It is absolutely basic workplace etiquette to take your turn, if this is how drinks are dealt with in your workplace.

In terms of giving a 2 word response to a Director who asked you to make them a drink, either you are lying, or you have only ever been in high status jobs. Low status employees who have worked in a wide variety of public and private places over 30 years would not be so surprised at this in some workplaces.

all on an equal pegging No you are not. This is a family firm. The Directors run it and pay the wages. They have considerably more power than you. Don't pretend everyone is equal in a workplace, because they are not.

You need to have a word with the younger two and tell them that not doing their share of tea making is causing tension in the office.

That’s nothing like what you suffered.

No issue with the Directors having their tea made for them.

I've been working in offices since I was 18 and honestly it still amazes me how much drama is caused over teas and coffees.

If you're thirsty go and get yourself and drink for fuck sake! Who gives a shit! I wish everyone would just get up and make their own.

Just stop including the youngsters in the tea round.

They'll get the message quickly enough.

@OffToBedhampton
But in your team meetings do you not have AOB that includes team news and resilience/ wellbeing issues?

Yes, of course, but not for petty playground shite like someone getting upset about making a cup of tea.

Just do away with the stupid idea of tea rounds. Everyone's happy.

I can't believe people are going to their manager complaining about this sort of petty issue. They need to sort it out themselves.

Completely off topic but I fucking hate the word ‘brew’.

Do you have office meetings or similar occasionally? If so, I'd suggest just a casual mention during one of those that it's been brought to your attention that not everyone does their fair share of tea/coffee rounds, please could they bear that in mind. If the problem persists, suggest to everyone that from now on they just make their own.

I don’t make the tea 🤷‍♀️
I wouldn’t make it for myself
I’ll sometimes have one if it’s going but not often and not every day

I do always unblock the printer though

As someone who hates tea rounds, I always think it looks really rude to decline if someone offers, and then I make my own cup 5 minutes later? So I tend to accept even if I'd rather get up and make my own. Just a different perspective..

I bet doing the washing up causes anarchy in some of these offices

I can't believe people are going to their manager complaining about this sort of petty issue.

oh, they do, and worst, so much worst....
Half of being a manager is being a babysitter, honestly, it's painful! Even allegedly grown-up and responsible adults turn into sulky teenagers.
The trick is not to try to be popular and their mate, and cut the crap. When people behave like kids, you treat them like kids

So glad I work somewhere with proper work to do and nobody cares about 'brews' which I assume means hot drinks.

Imagine having to be the one to bring this up during an office meeting 😂 I'd pull a sickie that day.