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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New lodger taking over my house!!!

496 replies

scrabbled · 26/02/2019 20:08

Ahhh not sure if I'm being unreasonable as my last lodger kept himself very to himself and I know I was lucky.

New lodger moved in Saturday, but I was away.

He is taking over my house!!

  • has installed a doorbell with alarms all over the house without asking me
  • keeps his bedroom door open whilst blaring out rubbish heavy metal music
  • has filled all available work spaces with protein and supplements and squeezed my stuff onto a tiny shelf
  • stays up until the early hours watching tv in he living room and refusing to turn it down.
  • kept his keys in the door so that when I got home from work I was locked out, as he was in the shower.

I've just been sitting quietly eating dinner and he has come in and turned on the TV and started watching something.

AIBU here? And if I'm not how do I tell him where the boundaries are?

OP posts:
kingfisherblue33 · 03/03/2019 15:35

Oh come on OP. He really took the door handles off? What did you say?? Did you let him??

Why??

He and you both sound bonkers.

Springisallaround · 03/03/2019 15:36

I don't believe this for a second but on the off-chance there's someone in danger (the OP), the last time I know of someone taking off door handles/changing door locks it was because they were tipping into a psychotic episode and they could control who entered/exited (and it got violent).

TrendyNorthLondonTeen · 03/03/2019 15:48

This thread is the biggest load of shit I've ever read lol

Noodles4Me · 03/03/2019 15:49

Deffo jumped shark now. Biscuit

crosspelican · 03/03/2019 15:49

Okay, he's demented. This behaviour isn't going to let up, and it's not your responsibility to deal with it. Just give him his notice and be done with it.

DishingOutDone · 03/03/2019 15:50

I was going to say I am confused but really its the OP that's confused. Why would anyone in their right mind allow this to go on? But seeing as you are clearly going to enable this behaviour, I hope it carries on being amusing.

Shambu · 03/03/2019 15:50

OP, he's clearly not mentally well, get your bf round and ask him to pack his stuff together.

FairyMoppings · 03/03/2019 15:59

RTFT right from the beginning. It was believable up to a point, but now I'm of the opinion this is all completely made up

I don't care if I'm troll hunting.... none of this has ever happened

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 03/03/2019 16:00

Hands up all you live in landlords with lodgers...
How many of you specified...
"all cakes baked by lodger must not exceed 3 layers"

NigellaAwesome · 03/03/2019 16:01

I'm starting to disbelieve this too.

On the off chance that it is real, you need to get him out of your home ASAP.

I would actually ring the police and tell them that you believe your lodger is having a psychotic episode, and describe the removal or door handles and installation of alarms. Advise them that you will be asking him to leave today, and to flag your number / address for rapid response should a call be made.

There was an awful incident a couple of years ago near us where a very mentally unwell man became psychotic and murdered his father, having held him captive for a few days. He believed he was an off-duty police officer who had detained an offender Sad

IceIceCoffee · 03/03/2019 16:04

Reading over the o.p again surely its odd to be away when a lodger moves in? I would want to be there when a stranger moved into my home.

MzHz · 03/03/2019 16:10

*Lodger, look, I know we got off to a shaky start, I was considering giving you immediate notice when you wired up the doorbells, filled my kitchen with protein stuff, behaved inconsiderately with the tv and music and generally took over my flat, but then you seemed to “get it” so I - perhaps wrongly - decided to give you another chance.

You’ve removed all my door handles and decided to spend an entire day making a cake. This isn’t what I want to happen in my own home. You are going to have to find somewhere else to live. I’m willing to be a little flexible, a day or 2 max, but you will need to be out of this house in no more than a week.

Tinkerbell89 · 03/03/2019 16:12

Evict him immediately

Cherrysoup · 03/03/2019 16:13

Get rid. I’m sorry, he sounds batshit. 🦇

DailyMailWankers · 03/03/2019 16:34

Are you OK OP? These messages must be distressing for you Flowers

JaneEyre07 · 03/03/2019 16:39

Think the cake isn't the only thing being over-egged.

Hmm
Schmoozer · 03/03/2019 16:42

I’m thinking this is unbelievable now 😂

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 03/03/2019 16:46

Really, DailyMailWankers* (enjoyed typing that!)... I would have thought that OP would be more distressed by finding her home encroached on a screwdriver-wielding, door handle-removing, protein-posturing, kitchen-invading, cake-making NUTTER than reading messages from posters validating her seemingly non-existent fears and urging her to do something about it. Shock

I can't imagine myself ever allowing a lodger to take over my home in the way that OP has seemingly rolled over to do. I hope OP has the deeds safely lodged at the bank lest her 'lodger', armed with a bottle of Tippex and a handy portable typewriter, wrests them out of her hands...

Of course, I truly hope that OP is safely ensconced in her own lodger-free home, chuckling at the posters 'worried for her'. If not, then better that she sells up and moves into sheltered accommodation because this (if true) naivety, is dangerous.

tinytemper66 · 03/03/2019 16:58

Use your spine! Get him out. I doubt you will though.
🤦🏻‍♀️

Newstart56 · 03/03/2019 16:59

Come on, surely OP you can see you need to get him out of your house?

DailyMailWankers · 03/03/2019 17:00

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

I was actually referring to the messages warning the muscly bloke in her house might be having a psychotic break and could murder her?? I for one would be bricking myself. It sounds unbelievable to us so might feel unbelievable to her, hence the lack of action.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 03/03/2019 17:05

DailyMailWankers, I see what you mean but surely, if the OP thought to post here in the first place then it was a sense of annoyance or unease that triggered that. Either that or boredom.

The thing is, that bloke doesn't need to be muscle-bound to be a risk to her and, if she posts again about his exploits, we'll know that a) he hasn't and that b) she's merely enjoying herself posting about it.

Nellieelephant · 03/03/2019 17:06

Are you absolutely sure your new lodger isn’t a homocidial maniac, because quite honestly fuck that shit I’d be getting down that police station toot sweet!

He sounds very unhinged and you seem to be pretty relaxed about this all Shock

Belenus · 03/03/2019 17:07

He is treating it like a house share.

I do wish people would stop saying this. In all the many years in which I house shared I never removed all the door handles, installed doorbells or took over entire communal areas. He's acting like a home owner, and one about to have a paranoid psychotic episode at that.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 03/03/2019 17:31

I do wish people would stop diagnosing psychoses online though, it's ridiculous and unhelpful.

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