Pretty is the same as tall?

[reallyreallyreal]

AIBU

My partners opinion is that describing someone as pretty is the same as saying short or tall and as factual as their hair colour.
I guess I don't see it that way.

He said pretty and being attracted to someone are too different things.

He was describing a 14 year old and said she is quite tall, glasses, round face, quite pretty.
I thought this was odd. He says not.

AIBU is it semantics?

“Tall” is not subjective. I am short so I could say anyone over about 5.5 is “tall compared to me” but tall for a woman in the U.K. is over about 5.8.

Currently sat is separate rooms.

Happy half term.

Beachvibes - I hear what you are saying, but that wasn't what I said and Glitterbug added her own interpretation to what I said

I have found that men find it harder to decide (admit?) if other men/boys are handsome/good looking/cute whatever you want to describe whereas women in my experience are much more confident to say another woman is beautiful/pretty/attractive. We don't think that people will assume we are sexually attracted to said woman.

I can describe many men, women and children as pretty/beautiful/handsome etc but feel no sexual attraction to them. It is just a way to describe how someone looks.

Are you going to apologise to him for your massive overreaction op, or are you going to sit on MN waiting to see if more people will agree with you and therefore fire your (ill-placed) righteousness indignation?

“Why are you sexualising children?”

I am not sexualising children. I am saying that girls/women are judged and valued for their appearance far more than boys/men are, and we should try not to do it. There is a very narrow framework of acceptable looks for women- and a much broader one for men. A couple of hours watching TV shows this.

I think it comes down to valuing looks over other attributes such as intelligence. Not many people consider children to be intelligent unless they're extraordinary. I think intelligence and wisdom are sometimes interchanged. Children are seen as lacking wisdom/knowledge so people just go by their looks and not their character

I agree with your husband. Saying someone is pretty or handsome has nothing to do with attraction. I know a very many pretty people who I'm not attracted to in the slightest but would still describe them as such.

@Pinkprincess1978

^this

Could it also be that some men say things as they see in a more straight forward way without the whole PC bandwagon in tow? I know that's a big generalisation but men and women think in very different ways. Sorry if saying that makes me a raging sexist ignoramous!

I have apologised but he is hurt. I will give him some time.
I didn't mean it to sound like it did.

@reallyreallyreal wow you are being ridiculous! I feel sorry for your fella!

“'Above average height' is the only thing I can think of which is personal value judgement free.”

Isn’t “tall” just shorthand for “above average height”?

Pretty is more subjective than hair or eye colour or tallness.
but I agree with your partner that just because you describe someone as pretty/ handsome/ attractive, does not mean that you are sexually attracted to them.

I don't think it's your fault OP. Women are raised in a society where their physical appearance is held in higher regard than their opinions, behaviour towards others etc. Almost like women are pit against each other- which "ornament" looks nicer on my self kind of way. I think it's understandable to feel threatened by another woman/female

Thanks to all that have made me see that this was a negative obsessive thought to an off the cuff comment.

I will try and fix it.

Well I throw bonny around with gay abandon.
I was going to say anyone younger than me gets a 'Thanks bonny lad' or 'thanks bonny lass' but then I remembered I used to visit my little Mam and see her beautiful silver curls, pink cheeks and smiling face and exclaim 'You look git bonny today, Mam!'.
So everyone's fair game to me.

I have apologised but he is hurt. I will give him some time.
I didn't mean it to sound like it did.

I really think you over reacted, especially if you have no other reason to worry about what he thinks of other women or worse kids.

I always hear people use pretty for girls just as a description (albeit a subjective one) I disagree with others saying that looks wouldn't be used to describe boys or men. Only yesterday my 14 year old son was trying to describe a celebrity to me and he said he was good looking

Above average height? No one says this...they say tall. because you know...that person is tall.

To be fair my mum does say

' tall like me' she is 5'5 but all of her sisters are under 5 foot.

Beachvibes this is probably where my jealousy stems from.

Jesus Christ Bert.

Even on a website for women nobody agrees with you. Doesn't that tell you something?

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/millennials-feminist-dont-identity-poll-refinery29-activism-a8492271.html

Fewer and fewer women are calling themselves feminists. I'm sure they support equality; they just don't want to associated with a certain type of feminist.

I'm glad men are called handsome and women are called pretty; it adds a bit a colour and flavour to the world.

“Tall” is not subjective. I am short so I could say anyone over about 5.5 is “tall compared to me” but tall for a woman in the U.K. is over about 5.8.

I'm over 5'8 and some would say I am tall, I am taller than most people I meet but I wouldn't describe myself as tall really as I am what I am. I do sometimes come across people taller than me - I felt like a midget yesterday as somebody in the petrol station was about 5 inches taller than me. I'm not used to feeling short - it was quite unpleasant!