Grown adults getting upset over Facebook isn't normal.

[FacebookFeud]

I know I'm not being unreasonable, 99% sure of it, but I'm losing my mind over the incredulous nature of this. I'm dumbstruck that this is an issue and need advice.

I had a falling out with a relative on my husband's side. I shared a meme about enjoying solitude and liking my own company and they thought it was targeted at them, I explained that it wasn't but they weren't having it. I ignored their behaviour because honestly I was baffled that a grown adult would read that into someone's post let alone accuse them of it to their face.

I subsequently placed that person on restricted to avoid future arguments. I don't like Facebook drama, or this sort of drama in general and have no time for it, so I did this to ensure it wouldn't happen again.

They have found out I've done this and gone bazerk. Calling me childish, rude, that I'm picking on them, that I hate them.

I really hate this sort of thing. Short of deleting my entire profile, which I don't see why I should have to do, I don't know how to resolve this without that person being offended.

Were they not a relative of my husband's I'd tell them to sod off. I've never met adults like this!

You're coming across as being very self absorbed and lacking in awareness of how your actions affect others.

Why are you sharing memes which seem to say you don't like people and want to be alone on a social network?

You sound like the type of person most of us would roll their eyes at seeing all these odd posts on our newsfeed.

If it's weird memes that remind you of yourself and make you laugh them probably Pinterest is more suitable?

You've (perhaps inadvertently) upset someone and rather than being nice about it you've then gone on to upset them further by punishing them, reinforcing the feeling that you don't like them by restricting their access to your profile.

Yes Facebook is yours to use as you wish but if I were you I'd be cringing at how I'd be coming across tbh. Step away from FB!

When all is said and done, I think the OP can rest assured that she won't have to worry about her DH's extended family inviting her to anything else!

Problem solved eh @FacebookFeud !

You hate parties, they will never invite you to anything again. RESULT!

RhiWrites asks the question I came on to ask -

You’ve said again and again that you explained it wasn’t about them. But did you actually say sorry for upsetting them?

The actual issue is minor, I agree, but you have a relative whose feelings have been hurt. You have explained that it wasn't directed at them, and have restricted their view of your posts, but did you actually say you were sorry that they'd been hurt?

You may feel that you don't need to apologise as it wasn't about them and any hurt was therefore unintentional, but a person has been hurt as a direct result of your post.

A close relative of mine has Asperger's. He doesn't do Facebook, but in other situations where he knows someone is upset he is very clear to express his regret/concern for that, even if he feels the actual underlying issue is minor or ridiculous.

Again I have been called names and apparently weird for using Facebook in a way that's different to you.

It's not a punishment to be restricted. It's not automatic to have access to my Facebook. Not being on it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means that I know you don't share my sense of humour or interests and so there's little point particularly if you're the sort to get offended about it.

I didn't apologise because I don't need to. It wasn't targeted at her. I explained that. That's all that needs to be said. If she's still offended after learning it wasn't about her then that's not my problem and is for her to deal with.

I'm really not bothered whether people invite me to parties or not. I don't like them and will usually decline an invite. No need for people to take it so personally.

Sharing a meme is as good as saying the words yourself (just a lazy alternative).

In my experience people who share this type of rubbish TYPICALLY do say in reaction to something (or they just have far too much time on their hands).

*do so

Facebooks pretty dire nowadays, if you're into posting/finding memes you could always move onto Tumblr? Personally I found your memes funny and relatable, specially the lonely cat, I cant believe how seriously some people take them and the other person must live such a paranoid life if they're reading that deep into a fb post

Sorry doesn’t always mean ‘I’m sorry I did something wrong’ it can just mean ‘I’m sorry you’re upset’.
For someone who ‘doesn’t like drama’ you also don’t seem to want to do anything likely to limit it.
Of course you CAN post what you like on Facebook then not apologise and restrict access to anyone offended but you can’t do that and expect good relations with your friends and relatives. You say no-one else has complained....yet. Your relative had never complained about any of your other memes before this one. If it’s really too much trouble to think before you post then it’s only a matter of time before other people tire of what appear like digs or insensitivity.
But if posting what you like without thought is more important than your relationships (which may well be the case) then crack on.

If you were a fb friend of mine who I had invited to things before, I would think you reposting that quote as really rude. I totally get why the relative was upset- especially as you’d just recently declined an invite. It doesn’t matter you not consciously posting it like that (though many do) because I would feel like any time I had invited you to something you weren’t wanting to come, wished I hadn’t invited you along and wanted to alomost laugh about the fact I had invited you. I feel the same when people make a point of saying in person that they aren’t social when we’re hanging out. I just think ‘oh fine, bugger off then’ it’s rude.

I wouldn’t class that as a meme, it’s just a quote and it’s nothing to do with a differing sense of humour. It’s just rude towards people who try to invite you to things and like an ‘in joke’ with fellow introverts.

And unless you’re happy to offend people, having friends or followers on social media does mean you having to monitor what you say in case you offend people- just like real life! I certainly do my best though there are times I wonder if a couple of people may raise their eyebrows at things I’ve posted I always try and think it through critically before I press the button, just like when I’m talking to people!

I didn't apologise because I don't need to. It wasn't targeted at her.

In this situation it does not matter that you didn't target her, she thinks you did. Therefore an apology is warranted even if it's just to say 'it truly wasn't targeted at you, I'm sorry you are upset.'

I wouldn’t class that as a meme, it’s just a quote and it’s nothing to do with a differing sense of humour. It’s just rude towards people who try to invite you to things and like an ‘in joke’ with fellow introverts
I agree.
And not even an in joke with introverts. I'm introverted and still wouldn't post something like that because it's basically a fuck you to people who invite me to things.

Sometimes I decline invites (especially if I'm only going to know a handful of people at the gathering), other times I go out. To share something like that is more an in joke with people who are rude and ungrateful.

"I didn't apologise because I don't need to" yes you really do!

Do you EVER apologise?

"Sorry doesn’t always mean ‘I’m sorry I did something wrong’ it can just mean ‘I’m sorry you’re upset’." Exactly - but don't say that!

You're saying "sorry my actions hurt you" (even though that wasn't my intent)

"And unless you’re happy to offend people, having friends or followers on social media does mean you having to monitor what you say in case you offend people- just like real life!" Spot on