To think this is low! And to feel hurt/confused

[Whatthe1]

So I have made a new (ish) friend (known for about 9months or so. We got on really well and it DC do too (met in school). Anyway we are currently planning on building a house and it’s all very exciting for us. We met up on Friday eve and she asked how plans were going. I told her and conversation led on. She got to the point of asking me which bank we were getting our mortgage from as lending here at the moment is difficult. I said we weren’t as we were hoping to self fund. She asked how?? I said that we had profit from our last house and some investments we were going to cash in. She then outwardly REFUSED to believe it!! Stating that at our age she couldn’t see how it was possible esp as we had two DC. I didn’t know how to respond so I just said, oh look it’s not important let’s talk about something else. The rest of the visit was ok but she was a little “off”

Anyway today I got the following message
Whatthe,
I have been In turmoil since Friday, I can’t understand why you would lie to my face about finances the way you did. I feel like either way I can’t continue being friends. If you are lying like I BELIEVE you are or whether you actually have THAT kind of money. I didn’t think you were one of those ‘money is no object people’ so unfortunately I can’t be around that. Sorry I really enjoy your company and you are a great new friend but this just doesn’t sit with me’

I haven’t responded as I am I shock I think! What the hell?? Do you think I should call or just leave her be? I AM DUMBFOUNDED 😮

It's so sad that your friendship is ending because of her envy about money. I'm not surprised though, some people do obsess about stuff like that. If I were you I think I'd have to reply just saying I'm not lying and I'm not sure why my bank balance matters so much to her.

FWIW, I avoid talking about money like the plague.

she will want one and it will annoy her to get no reaction

Agreed thebear

Zoe or Tikka both have great responses and more much better than "Would you ever fuck off you crazy cheeky bitch" like I would have said

That message only deserves a thumbs up or something. At least you've found out she's a loon early on.

Wow. That's batshit. So if one of her friends got an inheritance, say, 200K and wanted to build a house, she would dump them for being a 'money is no object type'? What's the ceiling on how much money someone has in the bank to be her friend? What a weirdo. I hope it won't be too awkward with your kids being friends.

I vote for no response at all. She’s said she can’t be around you, do as she asks and ignore.

I wouid probably reply
“Jealous much?”

@IStillMissBlockbuster yes I usually do to be honest I’m annoyed at myself for getting dragged into the conversation. I hate talking about money, if I had known it would have caused her “turmoil” I definitely wouldn’t have!!

Thanks ladies as I say i am gobsmacked!!I like the responses, I still think I may leave it a few hours to sink in properly before I do respond 😩

Oh christ, she sounds volatile and impulsive so I wouldn't piss her off with a snarky message just in case then she decides to hold a grudge and make your life difficult. I'd just say 'I'm sorry to hear you don't want to keep contact - all the best' and try and defuse things and then stay well away as she clearly has some iss-yoos!

Reply "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I really don't like to tell people about my international drug smuggling business. It's made us LOADS of cash but not everyone approves."

she sounds crackers

Bloody hell. That’s weird and awful. Wouldn’t bother replying but if you feel you want to I really like Zoe’s one. How very disappointing and upsetting. Go figure 🤷🏽‍♀️

This, as they say, is her shit, not your shit.

I wouldn’t reply.

On second thoughts, I wouldn't respond.

You have nothing to prove. Like someone has said, she's shown her true colours, take note.

It was a no-win situation, which she orchestrated, based on her jealousy and nosiness.

In her (weirdo) eyes; you're either a bragger or a liar..so who cares?

Batshit crazy. And jealous. Best out of that friendship, defo!

She's jealous. I don't blame her. Most are barely scraping by & renting to pay somone elses mortgage nowadays.

It's a bit weird of her though. Kudos for setting yourself up nicely. I don't see how people do it either.

This cannot end here. I absolutely need more on this. Could you invite her round, perhaps with an account or financial advisor, and demonstrate step by step where your money is coming from? Once she knows it's not a lie, and you are not a drugs baron, or a fraudster, we can truly get to the bottom of what does not sit well with her about having a friend who can fund a self build. She is clearly nuts and this would be a massive waste of your time but it is such a mystery. I have read your OP three times and I just don't get her problem!!!!

I wouldn’t bother replying to such a message, it sounds like she is trying to engineer a drama when, as PP have said, she should be happy for you.
Let her stew in her own drama and enjoy your life and lucky early escape.

Trying reason with an unreasonable person is the ultimate exercise in futility. Ignore and forget about her.

I agree that not responding at all would be the best course of action - that will reinforce the message that her text is so crazy it is not worthy of a response (it will also drive her mad!)

She's bitterly jealous, I mean even asking about your finances is seriously cheeky and overstepping boundaries, it's none of her fucking business.

Text her back and tell her to stick her jealously up her arse.

good luck with the new build.

I think she thinks you are rich and feels self-conscious around you and worried that she can't keep up with you in the future .
You are better off

Do not respond, in the interest of your kids. Carry on without her in your life, don't let the kids be impacted by her jealousy. She will try to garner support from other Mums but you must hold your head high as you have done nothing wrong. The truth will always out .