To believe babies don't start STTN at 9 months?!

[Fieau]

my baby is 9 months old and has never slept through the night. The best sleep was at about 3 months, when he did some 6 hours stretches. After he turned 4 months that went back to two hours between wake ups and has been the same ever since. He is fine to go to sleep, has a very consistent bedtime, he just wakes up a million times a night with no improvement.

People seem to either say that their baby started sleeping through the night at a much younger age (3/4 months) or that they didn't sleep through until they were much older (18 months). There doesn't seem to be a middle ground!! My husband keeps saying our baby will sleep through soon.... Am I being unreasonable to just give up any hope of him ever sleeping through the night??!!

He sleeps in with us, as when he wakes up I just feed him and he (usually) then goes back to sleep. I'm feeling broken after so long without a decent stretch of sleep

My DS has slept a solid 12 hours a night (with absolutely no waking) since he was 12 weeks. However, it’s got absolutely nothing to do with me, and everything to do with him. I take no credit for it! I’m sure yours will start sleeping through the night soon and broken sleep will become a dim and distant memory.

Mines 16 months and she has slept 13 hours twice last week which was her first sleep through ever. Since then she has woken loads though - I think they get their when they are ready.

Thanks for everyone's replies. Has been very interesting reading how different they all are. I'm a pretty gentle in my parenting style so not willing to do any cry it out but night have another go at putting him in his own room and see how it goes.

Does it make me a horrible person that I just feel better knowing that I'm not the only sleep deprived parent

You won't like my response but my son has slept through the night for probably the past 3 weeks at least. (He's 13 weeks old now.) As in going down between 7pm and 9pm and not getting up again until at least 6am. BUT he is a bottle-fed baby and I'm told it's often easier when they are - although we've also had a good bedtime routine in place from very early on to help him learn the difference between night and day.

If it makes you feel better, though, a) I'm not banking on it staying this way, and b) I've been a chronic insomniac since the age of 13 and regularly only bank 3-4 hours of sleep a night myself regardless of how well or badly my son sleeps :p

Oh, and of course I'm sure the baby's personality plays a large part in all of this too.

There is no difference in how bottle and bf babies sleep overall.

My first dd slept through for the first time a few days after her first birthday. I thought she was pretty bad but now have a second dd who is 13 months and still wakes a couple of times a night. I was hoping for a good sleeper when I was pregnant. I just go with it now and she sleeps next to me most of the night so just feed laying down. I am hoping by mid summer she will sleep better....

Mine both slept 7-6.30ish from about 6 weeks with a dream feed at about 10/11pm. 2 hours nap at lunch and a short morning nap of about 30 mins.
Routine routine routine is your friend (if you want them to sleep though of course)
On MN it seems to be the exception to try and get your baby to sleep through. I knew I was back at work then they were about 5 months and so needed them to sleep so I wouldn't be up every night.
And no we didn't do cry it out method or leave them crying at any point. They went to bed on their own & didn't cry.

11 months

Happened when I stopped feeding him in the night. DH went in for 3 nights for every wake, lots of protest first night but after 3 he was sleeping through. He still wakes many nights if he is teething, sick etc but no longer demands a feed and goes back to sleep easily.

My first from 4 months reliably, my second is 2.5 and still doesn’t. I have done exactly the same as my first and we have seen drs ect and apparently some kids just don’t sleep. (Yeay!) we co sleep with him now because it’s the only way I get enough to function. I don’t like it is I never get any personal space but the need to sleep is greater

I had one that slept through from 3 months and one from 8 months. 7-6ish. They were both bottle fed. I only have one friend who had sleep issues past 1- most were sleeping through by their first birthday regardless of breast or bottle.

My two were both BF and both slept through the night by 6 months 😪

TBH all the people I know with children (friends and family) didn't have night waking after about 6 months. On MN, there are children who don't seem to sleep reliably until they're school age! I'd say ignore these posts 😨

Baby is 8 months. Consistently slept 6 hour stretches between 2 months and 14 weeks... then woke up every 2 hours for about 2 months. Then at 6 months started sleeping 7-8 hour stretches. Now waking every 2 hours again for the last few weeks... ahh.

Mine slept through from birth.

(I'm honestly not bragging btw, she has more than her fair share of difficulties now in other ways which I would happily swap for sleepless nights....)

8 month old here and still waking every two hours on a good night! Doesn’t nap for more than 10 mins a time in the day either. Tried everything. 🧟‍♀️😴

Mine didn't sleep through until 14 months and didn't nap for longer than 20 minutes u til 10 months old.

I am never having another.

You are not alone OP.

It depends. Ds slept the night the first time at 11 weeks and for the next 7 weeks either slept the night or woke up once to gulp a feed and back to sleep. He had a pretty horrendous 4 month sleep regression after that but went back to sleeping the night at 7 months and continued to do so.
I do think a lot of it is down to their personality and own body clock though. Ds is now a 5 year old who will happily sleep till 9.30 if left whereas most of his friends are jumping out of bed at 6/7!

Twins. DD 9 weeks (give or take with teething). DS 4 and a half years. Haha go figure!!

I'd be very wary of people's accounts of their children's sleep. A very close friend of mine spent three years complaining about her DS1's sleep. She then had DS2, now nine months old, and now complains about his sleep and says things like, "If only DS2 were like DS1 who slept through the night at 6 months old!" Take it all with a pinch of salt OP.

My ebf baby slept from 11pm- 7.30am from about 4 months and then from 7-7 from about 7 months once she was well established on solids. I would move the baby into its own room. Babies often wake in the night and cry out for a minute but will settle back to sleep. When they're in your room the temptation is to leap
up straight away so you can get them back to sleep. If they are in their own room you don't hear every tiny noise and so they won't wake you up. But if they really need you, they will make sure you know!!

I don't believe there are set patterns. Every baby and circumstance is different. My youngest was up and down and probably wasn't consistently sleeping through til he was two or three. He's 9 now and has to be prised out of bed with a crowbar so whenever it happens it really won't be forever. My elder son was always a great sleeper... but only if in bed with me! He was over a year before he settled on his own but it wasn't that bad, he used to just want a drink or a pat.

My 10 week old dd sleeps through from 10pm till 8-9 am. She is formula fed though and who knows if it will stay that way?

2 years 7 months here 😩

My first one slept through when she was just under 3yrs old...effectively the day her sister was born !! Her sister slept through when she was 2yrs old. Their younger brother is nearly 2 and still wakes a few times. We co-sleep tho so its not hardship i find.

Ds1 was 9 weeks when he slept through reliably. Ds2 was probably 3, ds3 slept through at 7 weeks for about two weeks, he's now 9 months and rarely sleeps an hr or two without waking

I did the same with all three with regards to settling and routine, they are just all different