To think MN really is becoming a nest of vipers

[BeMorePollyanna]

Name changed

I reported 4 posts yesterday eve, all of which were deleted. I wasn't on the threads concerned just browsing through them. That's more than I reported in the last 6 months I think. I was also on the receiving end of stupid comments this week because someone CBA to read the thread and decided I'd said something I hadn't.

I know this subject has been covered previously but am I alone in thinking MN has become increasingly unpleasant lately? There seems to be real spite and nastiness.

I find this a surprising thread because in my opinion it's gone completely the other way. We aren't far off sparkly tickers!

Was just about to say something similar. Imo people are holding back more and more in their true opinions in fear of being deleted.

I was reading a thread yesterday that 5 years ago would have been ripped to pieces because of how unbelievable it was, yet everyone was sitting back and supporting the OP.

I name changed because, given the title of this thread I was expecting to get some unpleasant and abusive comments, which thankfully, hasn't happened.

But why does that make a difference to what name you use to post?

If you truly believe in something why would people disagreeing with you make you want to 'hide'? Ok I get that abusive comments aren't nice, but you'd be reading them in whatever name you chose anyway.

This is what I'm saying in general about MN. People are using the NC function to post controversial/inflammatory things but within talk guidelines.

If HQ were to crack down on that, then people might think a bit more carefully about what they post and how.

Worra Can't you see that you're demonstrating exactly the kind of tangential 'having a pop at the OP' behaviour that this thread is about?

Just stop please, OK? It's Not In The Spirit.

OP, cant you see that you're demonstrating the namechangy-to-be-a-bit-of-a-GF thing?

Stop hiding behind your NC OP. It’s embarrassing.

Perhaps there should be a poll. Can mumsnet do that? Simply asking are folk put off posting. The lurkers could come forward then safely. I cannot see the facility for a poll on this forum, on others I am on we find them very useful.

How the fuck is Worra "having a pop"? She was perfectly polite and measured. She just didn't agree with you. Aren't you an adult? Can't you handle people disagreeing with you?!

Worra was challenging you OP, not having a “pop”. I think you started this thread to “have a pop” actually.

Worra Can't you see that you're demonstrating exactly the kind of tangential 'having a pop at the OP' behaviour that this thread is about?

No, I honestly can't see that at all?

I'm making what I see as a valid point. If MNHQ were to limit name changing, or if they were to ban NCing just because people don't like others disagreeing with them, I honestly think some posters would think twice about how they come across to others.

Worra- I very rarely recognise names on mumsnet but for some reason I always notice yours. Probably because it’s memorable. I wonder if the OP has had a run in with you in the past and so is sensitive to your posts.

OP- I don’t always agree with worra but on this occasion I think they have a point. I don’t think it is a direct criticism of you, more of the system of name changing. I change name every couple of weeks or after a few posts because I have some things I like to post about that, if all put together, would be identifiable. It totally means I could change my posting style and online personality too though. So it is a feature that can be abused.
You don’t have to feel bad for name changing though. It is what it is and you are right, sometimes unpopular views are best not associated with your user name. “owning it” isn’t easy for everyone!

Totally agree. I'm fairly new, only joined 2016 when I found out I was pregnant but I've seen a massive change. I can guarantee the ones being horrible and nasty are the people that have no friends in real life. It's sad really, pity them and ignore x

I wonder if the OP has had a run in with you in the past and so is sensitive to your posts

It looks that way. Hiding behind a NC to try and put WL in her place.

NC to start a thread like this is nothing but cowardly and pretty goady tbh.

I just think theres less acceptance of bullshit here, which is fine. Everwhere else there is an attitude that all opinions are equal, facts are optional.

Somebody on Twitter is currently doing a big public twitter apology thing because they used the phrase 'tone deaf' and the Woke police found out. I dont want it to get like that here.

Hiding behind a NC to try and put WL in her place.

I wasn’t suggesting that, I doubt this thread has been started just to get at one particular poster. Sadly a lot of the posters replying are agreeing that the board has become worse.

Who knows why it was started.
Obviously something has pissed the OP off.

It's possible I suppose.

Either way, this is the internet and no-one can type anyone to death.

Name changing because people might disagree, kind of adds to the atmosphere the OP is talking about imo.

Agree and if nobody were allowed to name change it probably would change the tone. As would forcing people to use a genuine profile pic and their real name! I imagine that would balance the board up nicely!

I completely agree OP and it just spoils it .

I think it is great to have a debate/discussion but it's as if people just do not know how to conduct themselves in a proper manner.

I think some people actually don't want discussion or debate just want to talk "at" people and if you don't agree with them, they revert to abuse as they know no better.

Why oh why would you personally insult someone over some of the discussions on here. These people must be lacking in something in their lives to have to be so aggressive, judgmental and rude.
Most of the instances I have seen or experienced are people who are not even arguing a case of what you have actually said.

It is a shame and i find it easier to just remove yourself from the abuse, shouldn't have to but just makes life easier. It also makes me think what these people are like in RL and just happy in knowledge they would never be in my company in RL if they behaved like that. I think most are just keyboard warriors and in RL wouldn't say boo to a goose. Just a shame they have to make some threads unpleasant places.

It’s the reason why I hardly ever start any threads of my own.

This thread is a prime example of over sensitivity.
OP posted her opinions, inviting others.
She felt she was being picked on by another poster who challenged her. Worra didn’t swear, didn’t attack the OP, just assertively disagreed.
MN has always been known for this - straight and honest talking.
If someone has responded ”fuck off to another forum, you twat, I bet your dog hates you and I feel sorry for your children” I’d understand.

MN used to be a LOT more abrasive. With more freedom of speech and less deletions. People seemed to just say what they thought.

You will find the heart of the vipers nest over on the femanist posts.
Some very nasty misandric femanist remarks can be found there.
I put a post on there sometime ago regarding the sex discrimination displayed the BBC woman's hour program, and suggested that men should have a men's hour as well to air subjects of concern to them.
The general response can be summed up as fuck off, why should they.
That's femanist equility for you in a nutshell.

AIBU is taken as an invitation to be wankerish.

Steer clear and it’s a different place.

I remember MN before AIBU, when all this was fields etc etc.

Oh Vicky1990, you are funny. You have already been told that there was a men’s hour, but not enough men were interested in listening to it. How dare women want one whole hour about them? It’s not as if radio is Male heavy. Oh your funny fella Vicky

Your = you