To not want to date religious guys?

[LadyandGent]

I'm irreligious.

Am I being a bit previous for dismissing a guy because of his religion?

@mummyhaschangedhername

The question wasn't 'Would you compromise your beliefs for someone of another religion/no religion?', it was basically 'Would you date religious/non religious guys if you were religious/non religious?'

First answer - No

Second - Yes and I would seek mutual respect for each other's standpoint.

If I was going in the time travel machine, it would probably come up in discussion. If he was a militant athetist, he probably would lose interest fairly quickly. And that would be fine. However, there are many athetists who would happily date a religious person.

I do feel, based on your replies (and thank you) you really should only date someone who is similarly religious.
Thanks for the advice. I'll tell my very happy agnostic husband tonight

I dated a devout Christian for several months, I'm an agnostic. We were best friends first and we soon spent all our time together, getting serious quickly. He was/is a lovely, kind person with a great sense of humour but after a few months we had a talk and he said 'There's no point going long term with this because I can't marry you', which was crushing for me to hear but he was ultimately right. We were both heartbroken but young enough to move on relatively unscathed. We have both found happiness with other people but I can honestly say that I would have had to compromise so much to be a part of his world and when I met friends/his brother they didn't treat me particularly warmly, instead they seemed to view me with suspicion. (Which ultimately confirmed I was right to not even try to stay with him as their treatment of me was hardly kindly.)
Ultimately it depends on the people involved - I know more than one happy mixed faith couple - but from personal experience it can be a minefield, with fundamental differences in core values and when building a life together you need to have unshakable foundations and faith for many people is a significant foundation block. X

I'm a Catholic and would happily marry an athetist dependant on a mutual tolerance and respect of each other's beliefs. The only 'sticking' point may be that I would want to be married in the Catholic Church and our children to be brought up as Catholics (as promised to God on our wedding day).

Well this gave the impression you weren't married!

Yes I had assumed you were not married. And anyone who marries a catholic (unless lapsed) will be expected to "compromise" and allow their kids to be brought up as catholic.
I used to be naive about this issue and would have said when a young adult, oh it does not matter, as long as you love each other. That is not true.
If you are an atheist and your partner is Cof E and goes to church once or twice a year, it probably will have no impact. But if it means any kids have to be brought up in the religion of one partner, when the other partner does not follow that religion, then it starts to really matter.

I'm a Mormon, but I'm a progressive, feminist, liberal Mormon, and I wouldn't want to marry a Mormon bloke unless I was absolutely sure they shared my worldview. Holding the views I do can get you into a lot of trouble with church leaders, (see Kate Kelly.) I'd rather date/marry someone who is an open minded agnostic.

I did once and wouldn't again. He lied to his parents and told them I was a Methodist, and his mum spent a year trying to get me to do the alpha course.
I also have no interest in going to church, or raising my child to believe in a deity of any kind.
The lifestyle would be too incompatible with mine I believe.

I couldn't do it, Religious beliefs are one of my hard limits, I wouldn't be able to understand a huge part of their core beliefs. I know that this is judgemental of me but I'm ok with that. I need to be able to respect my partner and I don't think religious beliefs are rational and so wouldn't trust their judgement or rationality.

I very much enjoy having discussions and debates, I'm not looking for someone who agrees with me totally, but personally I find some beliefs to be harmful. Religious, pro-Brexit, racist, homophobic, or hard-core neo-liberal beliefs lead to suffering and I don't find people who hold them attractive.

I think you have to take each person on their own merits. I'm not religious at all but my partner is a practicing Muslim and it works out just fine because we accept each other as we are. If he tried to push religion onto me, or I tried to discourage him, it wouldn't work. But Is think a blanket ban is a shame, you might be missing out on some lovely people.

Some of the views about faith on this thread are so narrow minded, have you been keeping up with the times or do some of you just have a pre-conceived view of religious beliefs? The Church I belong to fully supports gay rights, we have gay ministers, married or in partnerships. People are supported, without judgement, if they need an abortion or give up a child for adoption. Just as important is the outreach work done, often for people with additiction issues, and with NO expectation that they will ‘come to faith’. The Church does huge amounts of community work for the marginalised in society, Food Banks, helping rough sleepers, soup runs etc etc.

Personally I could never date anyone who didn’t do some form of volunteering or community work.

And that's your prefrence. And mine is not to date anyone who believes there's some magical thing out there that created the world and now must be respected

That's fine. But I hate The concept of God. I'm an atheist so I can not believe that anyone can buy into any of the beliefs.

Me wanting proof is a fast was to destroy a relationship.

@BloodyDisgrace The conversation came about because he told me he doesn't drink alcohol. He then said it's because he is Muslim.