to think pamper parties for primary school children is not appropriate

[dancinginthehall]

I don't want to de-rail another thread, so thought I'd start a new one. My 9 year old niece has been invited to a couple of these recently and doesn't particularly enjoy them. Her parents aren't particularly keen either.

AIBU to wonder why young girls can't just remain children for a while and not have these grown up style events pushed on them? Surely at 9 party games or bowling or a trip to the cinema is more appropriate than having their make up and nails done?

To the PP who said her DD would find it 'boring so probably wouldn't go'. I think that's a bit rude. The party activity should be about what the party girl or boy likes.

My DC have been to plenty of parties that are activities they don't particularly enjoy. Paint a mug and decoupage parties in particular. Both DD and DS find them boring. DS also didn't like the ubiquitous football parties. However they both went along and were smiley and happy because that is what their friend wanted to do.

Does anyone else have a deep loathing of the word "pamper"?

There's something about this word that makes me want to claw my own throat out.

Kokeshi, I know exactly what you mean. It's advertising vocabulary. See also: succulent, luxurious, stunning, country fresh etc. (that last one may be a bit old-hat ). They're all overblown words for ordinary everyday things, the verbal equivalent of cheesy Wotsits or Rice Krapies Krispies, all air and no substance.

(Krapies was a typo but I thought it was funny so I left it. )

Pamper parties? Meh. Each to their own; most party activities are something and nothing anyway. My DD had a few of these and she's a perfectly normal (ish) teenager.

However they both went along and were smiley and happy because that is what their friend wanted to do.
Its also about doing things with friends whether you enjoy the activity or not.

Can’t see the harm in it. Wouldn’t let my DS go though.

Not even if he wanted to @Ringdonna?

Why are some posters equating not thinking pamper parties are suitable for small girls with discouraging girls to like girly stuff.

I have no problem with little girls wanting to play with dolls or having a preference for pink stuff or anything like that. I do have a problem with their parties taking a form more suited to Housewives of New Jersey.

Children at a party should be playing games or outside having fun, not having their nails painted and their make up applied etc. That's for older people. Let children be children.

"Children at a party should be playing games or outside having fun, not having their nails painted and their make up applied etc."

In your opinion. Clearly other people - and plenty of children - think something different.

Imposing your idea of fun on your children isn’t ‘letting children be children’.

They sound awful - very kardashian and vacuous.

It's not really the party that you choose. That is up to you and your child. If children are polite and it is their friend, then they should go and not complain.

To me, this does seem like a commercial selling opportunity- and I don't like subjecting children to that.

I agree that bits and girls might all enjoy pamper parties and football parties. But is this actually a way of excluding one sex, and trying to tell children what they should be enjoying.

If you all genuinely invite loads of both boys and girls to pamper parties and football parties, then I am wrong and I apologise.

Of course, your daughter wants no boys, this is excellent way to do it because you have an excuse that you thought her male friends wouldn't like it. More strict gender stereotyping!

Boys and girls not bits and girls

"Imposing your idea of fun on your children isn’t ‘letting children be children’."

Gosh yes, what is this new idea that 8 year olds should enjoy playing games and running around outside? How dare anyone 'impose' that notion on us.

Any party that isn't a picnic in the park or at home is a commercial selling opportunity for one business or another!

Of course kids generally enjoy running around outside. They’re also capable of enjoying more than one thing and preferring other things.

The ones my girls have been to haven't resulted in them being slathered in makeup. They've curled or plaited their hair and put a bit of nail polish on. And yes boy was there too. Shock horror! I can't get worked up about it I'm afraid. Just decline the invite if you're that bothered. No need for a big drama.

Yes Pork but that doesn't mean that some of the things they enjoy mightn't be age inappropriate. And in my opinion, and that of many other posters, pamper parties are a grown up concept and children should be allowed to remain children and not encouraged to behave like teenagers.

Whose making a big drama Pinkblanket? We're having an interesting discussion. You seem to be the one getting a bit dramatic with your 'shock horror' exclamation.

Personally I think getting your hair in ringlets and glitter nail polish is ONLY appropriate for children. Certainly wouldn’t have fancied doing it for my 21st.

You think it's appropriate for children? Along with having eye shadow, foundation, lipstick and blusher applied?

No full faces of make up at any of the pamper parties for kids I’ve seen. A bit of glitter eyeshadow at most. It’s generally hair plaited or in ringlets and nail polish. What adult would have that kind of party?

I was thinking that @PorkPatrol when someone upthread suggested these parties were more appropriate for 25 year olds!

Lydia. They don't apply a full face of make up at pamper parties. My daughter was invited for a 7th birthday and they plaited their hair, painted nails and had a glittering tatoo.

It’s not either all is it? At my 10 year olds request we did t shirt decorating, chocolate game, nail painting and crazy chalk hair colours. Is that permitted? But then I do that crazy parenting thing where I actually ask my kid what she wants to do on her birthday and take it from there (within reason)

I agree, my DD is 7 and beautiful inside and out - why would I want to start the inevitable questioning of this at such a young age! She likes nail varnish sometimes but it's in the same way that she likes crafts, it's a curiosity at an individual level. A party of pampering suggests there's something to be overcome that's lacking in the way a whole group of girls look.

Oops I meant 15 year olds. Still hilarious though!