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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if I'm the only one who didn't .....

193 replies

HildaZelda · 21/01/2019 18:16

..... have a hen when I got married? Back in the noughties so they were definitely a 'thing' at the time.
It was a combination of things really, different groups of friends, some who didn't get on with others, some that I knew would be last minute cancellations, my mother (before going NC) would have tutted at everything and sat there with a cat's bum face.

I don't for one moment regret not having one. Never did, and if I was ever getting married again, I still wouldn't.

Anyone else?

OP posts:
Glitterblue · 21/01/2019 18:19

I didn't. It's just not my kind of thing. I've never been on one either.

speakout · 21/01/2019 18:21

I didn't.

I have never been to a hen either!!

Not my thing.

Gatehouse77 · 21/01/2019 18:21

Nope, me neither. Partly, I think, because I don't drink and so much of hen night's seem to revolve around drinking in some form or another.

But mostly because I'm an unsociable cow and preferred a night in with STBDH.

JohnLapsleyParlabane · 21/01/2019 18:21

I didn't and have repeatedly been glad to have avoided it

marymarkle · 21/01/2019 18:23

I enjoy Hen nights, but did not have one as we had a tiny wedding. Only me, DP and 2 witnesses. We didn't tell most people we were getting married.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 21/01/2019 18:25

I went out for a meal with the women coming to my wedding but that’s it. I don’t remember most of it as I had a migraine.

cosytoaster · 21/01/2019 18:26

Me, not my thing at all. I've only been to a couple of (thankfully) low key ones.

HollowTalk · 21/01/2019 18:27

Does everyone have their mum at a hen night? I would have hated that!

RayRayBidet · 21/01/2019 18:29

I had one but it was in the olden days when you went out for a drink with your mates and then had a bit of a dance. Nowadays you have to fly to Ibiza for four days and spend eight million pounds. Twice.

StickItUpYaJumpa · 21/01/2019 18:30

I didn't. Mainly because I felt very self conscious of my lack of friends.

But also because the friends I do have were all over the country and I wasn't sure if they would be willing /able to travel.

Plus I've experience of people being flaky and cancelling at the last min.

M0reGinPlease · 21/01/2019 18:30

I didn't. Not my thing either. In the end two of my closest friends took me for dinner instead and that was lovely.

CMOTDibbler · 21/01/2019 18:31

I went out for a cheap meal and comedy club with male and female friends. Can't imagine having had my mum there!

Pascha · 21/01/2019 18:32

I refused one too. DH had a small stag paintballing with one close mate, my brothers and our dads but I just didn't want any kind of spotlight on me at all

Bringbackthestripes · 21/01/2019 18:33

I didn’t have one, I was working away and getting married where I was working. People travelled for the wedding but only the day before and it was a small gathering. I used to Feel I may have missed out but I certainly wouldn’t have been happy with penis doodle boppers or penis straws and a tacky veil stuck on my head so probably for the best.

Trinpy · 21/01/2019 18:33

I didn't (married 7 years ago) because it's not my sort of thing and I wouldnt have known who to invite! I did go out for dinner with a couple of friends though.

TrickyKid · 21/01/2019 18:34

I didn't, not my thing.

SpawnChorus · 21/01/2019 18:35

I didn't either. DH and I had a very casual get together in the pub with our friends. I utterly, passionately loathe hen/stag dos. I think it's something about the sec segregation that bothers me, plus some sort of implicit message about it being a last hurrah of your freedom. Ugh.

SpawnChorus · 21/01/2019 18:36

*sex segregation!

SleepingBooty · 21/01/2019 18:37

I didn't and DH didn't have a stag either. Couldn't be bothered with that at all. Very small wedding too with just our DPs, GPs and DBs. We were cajoled into a reception when we got home but didn't want or enjoyed it.

Racecardriver · 21/01/2019 18:38

I didn’t. DH didn’t have a bachelors party either. That’s just not the done thing in any of our cultural influences.

Trampire · 21/01/2019 18:38

I didn't.

My family lived 5 hours away from me. All my school/college friends were scattered across the world/country. Many of them had small children. I was asking them to travel to me for my wedding anyway so felt I couldn't ask again for a hen night.

Me and my (gay) best friend went out to a gay disco. We had a laugh, but it wasn't really a hen night.

After I had my dcs I now have lots more local friends and things may have been different. It would only ever be a night though. I'm not up for these holiday-hen things.

RandomMess · 21/01/2019 18:40

No I didn't, I suppose I don't really have many friends etc.

Talkingfrog · 21/01/2019 18:40

I did. I went with my mum, mum in law, sister in law x2, matron of honour, her mum and my 10 year old niece to thi Friday. Not what some would think entertaining enough. My husband didn't want a stag, but got persuaded to go to a local rugby game with his brother and our dads, then for a meal.

lljkk · 21/01/2019 18:41

I did but I did it wrong. It was just a meal out & quiet chat & laugh with a few buddies. I didn't know they were supposed to be rowdy or exciting. Oops. (I wouldn't enjoy rowdy, clubbing, strippers, etc anyway)

RosieposiePuddingandPi · 21/01/2019 18:42

I didn't. I had a small weddings so it felt a bit weird and I was 3 months pregnant when we got married so I didn't feel like having a drink or a night out! Some of my friends were a bit persistent I should have one but I'm glad I didn't, we needed the money for the wedding.

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