to think I can't be the only one who is a mess on the school run?

[LeenaMarie]

DSD (7) and DS (3 months).

School run I'm about to do this morning (DSD lives 16 miles away so it's a trek at this time when roads are nuts!).

I've got leggings and underwear on I had on yesterday. Still have my pyjama top on under my jumper/coat. Haven't brushed my teeth yet. Etc etc.

Totally exhausted from breastfeeding all night. Found it easier when DS was 0-8 weeks as he slept a lot better. The last month has been HARD!

DH does most of the school runs but he doesn't have to wake up in the night to breastfeed so always has time for a shower and seems really together.

I'm just... a mess when it's my turn!

Anyone else?

I plan on going straight back to bed when I get in as I'm exhausted!

[Wildestflower]

Shower, teeth, clean clothes, brush hair, lipgloss, squirt of perfume. You can do this on auto a couple of weeks. You'll feel so much better. New babies, sleeplessness and blended families can very hard (been there) but if you feel bad about how unkempt you are, it will erode your self esteem.

[Myheartbelongsto]

I think you're doing an amazing job op and I wouldn't believe half the replies here.

You'll find mostly perfect parents here.

I'm dropping mine I ten mins and I have yesterday's make up, hair all over the place and yesterday's clothes half of which I've slept in. They'd have a field day with me on here.

Had you posted saying you were feeling down, had been up all night breast feeding and were finding things hard, posters would be saying don't worry about what you look like, baby is fed bla bla.

You can't win on here!

[ToffeePennie]

Op, first off huge hugs!
Secondly this could be me writing this!
If I don’t have at least 6 hours unbroken sleep a night I turn into something from the monsters. I become horrible, snappy and hideous to live with, so I know how important that sleep is!
I also breastfed my baby through the night. And couldn’t function the next day.
Mine is now 14 months. I work from home. 3/5 days I don’t shower. I do put clean knickers on and clean my teeth, usually I slap my hair into a top knot.
I’m not going to see anyone, it’s a 20 min walk to school, no one talked to me when I was showering daily, they don’t talk to me now, so frankly who’s going to care? A decent clean coat sees me through.
Fridays I take a shop front out so I shower whilst dh does the school run, and Mondays I shower whilst dh watches the baby, but most weekdays - no one is going to see me!
Crack on op! Your doing just fine!

[Dotty1970]

I don't have a baby so have no excuse but to make you feel better I don't change my underwear, wear yesterday clothes, scrape my hair up which looks terrible, no makeup, usually no teeth brushing, same socks, coat, hat to cover the hair, scarf as usually always freezing where we live but our journey is only 3 miles and I don't get out of the car.... Just always think what if I break down or crash... I would feel awful for the paramedics .... I am home after 10 mins and shower and charge then

[donajimena]

sparkle maybe you need to get your nethers checked? When I used to work 12 hour shifts my pants didn't smell. Neither did my colleagues. The air didn't suddenly turn green past a certain number of hours!
How many hours is the turning point exactly? Just so anyone concerned can set a pant change alarm

[babysharkah]

I don't get the not brushing teeth thing doesn't that just feel rank?

I can't get worked up about the rest. Mine are older now but I've just done the school run straight from a gym class so I probably smell worse than you!

[LeenaMarie]

I had time to write the post because my baby was firmly attached to my boob and I wasn't moving anywhere. I had to unlatch him upset half way through a feed as I had to get DSD to school and am now sat in the car outside the school gates feeding him before I get back.

I would've brushed my teeth usually but DS was feeding and time was ticking away... I chose to carry on feeding him fo another two minutes in the hope he would latch off by himself, but no such luck. He screamed the whole journey and I felt awful but I couldn't do anything as DSD needed to be at school.

To another poster who asked if I had written a previous post about this, no I'm not but I know which post you mean!

[Lovestonap]

To the poster that advocates lipgloss and a squirt of perfume before leaving the house each day - the fifties called, they want their Women's Realm article on how to be the perfect wife and mother back.....

[KatherinaMinola]

I had time to write the post because my baby was firmly attached to my boob

All the sane people reading your post assumed this already.

It doesn't matter too much when in the day you brush your teeth, as long as you brush them.

I'm sure there's a complicated backstory as to why you're driving 16 miles to pick up DSD in the morning to take her to school - but is it something that can be negotiated at all with her mum while your baby is so young?

[MaverickSnoopy]

It can be bloody hard to fit everything in especially when you have a bf baby who might feed for an unpredictable amount of time - part of the reason I'm still mixes feeding. Quite often I find myself bf'ing and it's nearly time to leave and so I top up with formula or else she'll be screaming until we're home. In your shoes I would certainly prioritise feeding my baby over brushing teeth. Have you tried feeding in a sling? I found it tricky but good for the odd emergency when you do need to feed and do something else.

[Nothisispatrick]

Lipgloss means my hair gets stuck on my lips and I don’t wear perfume around a young baby, so no thanks.

[Coralnails]

Oh fgs op ignore all the bitchy posts, reminds me of spiteful school girls.

It's fine, you're fine.

I haven't even got a baby and I did the school run today the same as you. Guess what, I did have time to shower etc, I just chose not to. I wasted the morning watching tv, eating toast and drinking coffee because it's my day off and I can. Then I threw my clothes on from last night and left.

Now back home with youngest and I will shower and change for the day at my leisure.

I'm not dirty and I don't smell.

[IWannaSeeHowItEnds]

I think you are going to have to bounce this back to your husband. If dad was yours, then presumably she wouldn't be living 16 miles away from her school. That this has happened is something her mum and dad should be resolving. Fine for you to help out when you can, but this shouldn't be your whole responsibility.

[TeddybearBaby]

It’s so hard!! And some people cope better than others, big deal. They can have a gold ⭐️ 🙄.

My school wrote a letter telling parents they weren’t to wear pjs to school so that’s obvs a ‘thing’. I think what you’re doing is fine until you feel better. Just brush your teeth before you go and have a shower when you get back. It doesn’t last long and you’ll be back to yourself x

[Pernickity1]

I’ve been how you described OP, when I only had 1 DC! Was worse when DD2 came along as she NEVER slept. I made it a New Years resolution to get dressed in clean clothes, brush my teeth and make my bed before I leave my bedroom in the morning. It’s made a huge difference to my mood and feeling “together” you should try it! Despite what some of these comments are saying - You are not alone

[MrsBandersnatch]

That is my plan! About to leave so will read all the replies about how disgusting I am when I get back!

Just in case, here's a reply that says you're not disgusting

[NothingTraLaLa]

With a three month old, getting anywhere on time is an achievement, let alone somewhere miles away during rush hour when you're knackered. Plenty of time for a shower when you get home - priority has to be school drop off. Don't beat yourself up about it; you're doing fine.

[sar302]

No one can smell knickers you've had on over night, in the playground FFS! Mouthwash if you don't have time to clean your teeth. I bought "fitted" joggers so I could be barely dressed, but looked decent enough leaving the house in an emergency. You breastfed your newborn and got you DSD to school on time. You won this morning!

[Hoppinggreen]

Bloody Hell OP are you still doing this?
You’ve posted several times about how you can’t/don’t want to ( if you are the poster I think you are)
You’ve been given solutions, have you tried any?

[Coralnails]

Of course it's not disgusting, anyone who say it is is just uptight and completely exaggerating.

Never brushing your teeth and letting them go rotten is disgusting. Brushing them later in the day because you're tired/busy is insignificant.

[higgyhog]

In the greater scheme of things it doesn't matter at all, competitive dressing for the school run is a bit sad. On the other hand there will be women with a similar situation at home who are back at work or will be soon. They will have to do a school and nursery drop off and be clean and suitably dressed for work. Presumably there are tips that you could pick up to achieve this, such as putting clothes out the night before etc. that would help. But only if it matters to you.

[Hoppinggreen]

Sorry, just st seen it’s not you!
No you aren’t disgusting and plenty of people are a mess on the school run. My dc are older so I have more time but I wear a decent coat and uggs so nothing else shows . It’s harder in summer

[CoffeeAndCakeEssentials]

Oh ignore all the nasty replies. I stuffed my manky greasy hair under a hat, put a jumper and coat over my PJ top, put on leggings and boots and walked my eldest to school. Then when I got back I showered and got dressed. No one cares what you look like for the morning school run, especially when you have a tiny baby. You got DSD to school on time (I'm assuming?!) so well done! MumsNet can be so mean!

[Justbackfromnewwine]

I go out in the same state as you but only if I’m dropping at the gate and not actually getting out of the car or seeing anyone.

I dropped dd at ballet the other Saturday morning in my pjs, dressing gown and slippers with birds nest hair! Was just thinking all the way there and back that I really hope the car doesn’t break down!

[HauntedPencil]

When mine were babies I loved winter because you can hide your hair under a hat

Never have time for a shower

Sleep is my no 1 priority.