This is odd and entitled isn’t it?

[Fusioluxe]

I bought a friend with twins two large wooden toys for her children for Christmas. Not cheap and I knew they would be liked. I had them delivered straight to her as they were big. Tracking showed they arrived.

Christmas came and went and I heard nothing so I ventured to ask her today whether she had ever received them. Her reply “Oh, were they from you?”

No thanks, no “oh the mystery is solved!”, but she did say the twins love them.

It seems that they arrived before Christmas, she was out, her mother was in, mother opened the parcel straight away and put the toys in the nursery, and got rid of the packaging. There was supposed to be a note in with them saying Merry Christmas from me but if it was there it wasnt looked at and thrown away.

I asked my friend hadn't she wondered where the toys were from when she had arrived home and saw them. She said no! 😲

Please tell me I’m not being unreasonable by thinking that isn’t normal behaviour!

[Fresta]

Ha ha Jax, no-one is going to thank you for one of those charity presents- it's the equivalent of saying 'I didn't get you anything this year, I donated to charity instead'.

You were very generous OP, so either you are very close to her, very well off or wanting some kind of special recognition for your 'generous' gifts.

Sounds like they wondered who on earth has sent such enormous parcels and opened them early in curiosity, or they couldn't locate the note that went with it. If she said that the twins love them that that is your thanks in my book- sounds like the parents don't love them though.

[Procrastination4]

Agree Fresta, those “donated part of a goat” ‘gifts’ wouldn’t even register with me, let alone my “liking it and thanking the donor”.

[AgathaMisty]

All this bollocks about having little time, being on Mumsnet doesn't count of course.

Great point Bloomini.

[Fusioluxe]

Can’t open the jojo site right now, down for maintenance at the mo. It was the dinosaur and sheep rockers. They had an offer on though!

[Fusioluxe]

Perhaps I ought to get them a goat for their birthday 😁

[Fusioluxe]

If she didn’t like them, why didn’t she find the packaging slip, company name on the outside of the parcel, to send them back?

[WellThisIsShit]

What lovely gifts. Surely she has just been socially awkward for some reason and messed up her thank you in the process?!

I’d chalk this one up to your friend having had an off day / week/ Xmas, or having had an argument about the unwrapping of the rockers or something like that which has made it all a bit awkward.

[KTheGrey]

That was a delightful and generous gift. I expect she was just too frazzled with two year old twins to keep up with anything inexplicable, but all the same, I would not buy any more expensive gifts for them. Chickens are even more cost effective than goats

[Dollymixture22]

I totally agree it is odd and rude behaviour - from both your friend and her mother.

These were very generous and thoughtful gifts. The mo5er shouldn’t have opened them - why would you open a package not addressed to you!!! She must have realised they were Christmas presents. It’s really odd she opened them and gave them to the kids without checking, in fact that doesn’t ring true.

Did your friend open them and forget to say thank you, or didn’t like them, or thought it was too generous and got embarrassed. No idea what is going on but I would be flipping raging in your position

[Fusioluxe]

I think I do believe that the mother opened them. The story was very convincing. It was “Oh were they from you? My mum opened them when they came and I never saw who they were from...” sort of thing.

It IS odd that her mother opened them!

[ElektraLOL]

God, some posters on MN are just deliberately awkward. 'I would be annoyed, I don't have the space' etc. Really??!!

If there was really no room for them they wouldn't have been opened in the first place. Some of you really are obtuse.

A friend buys you a lovely expensive Christmas present for your twins. The very least you can do is say thank you!

[bertiesgal]

Bloomini calm down.

I’d definitely say thank you but I’m also understanding of the fact that some people Aren’t as perfect as me 😉.

Posted too soon as twin 1 just head butted me while texting. Best get back to my brood...

[AnneOfCleavage]

The DM probably opened them while the DC were around so they saw them and wanted them immediately.

Also if no note could your friend assume a wrong package had been delivered but didn't want to question as so lovely and took credit for them herself? cynical

[Eliza9917]

Why is the mother opening post that isn't hers?

What if the friend had had a delivery from lovehoney?!

[The80sweregreat]

It is odd and rude too.
I would also be miffed.

[Fusioluxe]

AnneOfCleavage, my husband said the wrong package thing but what’s the chances of two similar things being delivered to a house with twins?

[Meredith501]

YANBU to expect a thank you.

YABU to expect your friend to deal with gifts in a certain way - if she is happy for her mum to open her parcels that's her business; if she has a policy that Christmas presents are spread out over a period of time so as not to have all presents opened on Christmas morning and the house torn asunder that's also her business.
I do not understand people that give gifts and then give out that the receivers didn't use them in the manner that the giver expected. Surely the point of your gift giving was that the children would enjoy them, your friend has told you they do. Job done.

[Bobbybear10]

They were beautiful gifts OP.

I think your friend is being very unreasonable and incredibly rude in the way she has handled the whole situation.

[Fusioluxe]

Meredith501, I don't mind one jot that her mother opened the parcel. I think it’s odd that on returning to the house my friend didn’t query where or who they were from!

[WhyOhWine]

I don't see how the story of the mother opening them and leaving them out for the DC to play with can be true.
How would the mother have known it was not a father Christmas gift that your friend herself had ordered?

[livefornaps]

Those rockers are soooooo cuuuuttte!!!

They are lovely.

I would notice something as beautiful as that just appearing one day. Anyone would!

I think she's being a bit glib.

I would consider those really special gifts.

And if I were the giver, I'd want them to be opened on Christmas day like a present, not plonked in the middle of the room and that be that.

[livefornaps]

Yes Whyowine I made that exact point, too_!

[Fusioluxe]

WhyOhWine and livefornaps, I hadn’t really thought of it but yes that is strange.

Even if it’s normal for them to get deliveries and my friend’s mother to open them, it was Christmas!

[ShesABelter]

The weirdest thing is her mum opening and putting out a gift that could of been bought by her for Xmas.

And your friend returning and not even querying where they had come from.

My inlaws received a package before Xmas they hadn't ordered and called us all to see if anyone sent it to them. And their parcel wasn't even as expensive or large.

[StoneofDestiny]

What a kind and generous gift OP. Can't believe you were not properly thanked. Takes seconds to send a text to all family and friends to ask who sent lovely present.