To think this is one of the most painful things you can do.

[sweeneytoddsrazor]

Stub your toe. Stubbed little toe earlier on the table leg. Of course no shoes or slippers on to cushion the blow. Air very quickly turned blue followed by toe turning a lovely shade of bluey/purple. Nice 9 hour shift later and it is bloody agony.

Rolling your ankle while walking on a flat road leading a horse and tearing all the ligaments... On xmas day to make it worse

Coldsores. Not the most painful thing but the tingling from this one actually woke me up 2 nights running. So sore and itchy.

whyameyehere my DP had one of those 18 months ago. It was horrendous, had to lay puppy pads under him on a mattress in the spare room. Never seen suffering like it. Actually scared of it returning. Hope you're OK now

Has anyone else on this thread read 'This is Going to Hurt"? Very funny book on a drs experiences while working for the NHS. Also quite traumatic in places but won't go into that.
But out of all the things he writes about the one recounting that sticks in my head is when they have a patient in with a degloving incident. Now I know a couple of nurses in real life who have come across fingers and the like being degloved. But in the book, this guy degloves his PENIS while trying to slide down a street light. Utterly shuddery sick making thought...

@DoctorDread why no anesthesia? Just googled and that sounds really traumatic.

Sprained ankle.

Toothache was bad but not the worst.

Screw digging into finger while something heavy pressing down. Only time I have involuntarily screamed.

Earache was worse than the toothache.

Have stubbed a toe, really really painful, touch it and it is excruciating, then after that when tentatively feeling for damage, no pain at all. Still can't work out why it went from excruciating to touch to painless in such a short time.

I can also add a child stepping on the side of your foot when one is sitting on the floor. Or child standing on your calves when you are kneeling.

Catching the leg of the ironing board between your big toe and the toe next to it. Fucking agony.

Worst pain ever though was when my umbilical hernia twisted- it was the size of a grapefruit and I was on the waiting list for surgery for nearly a year. That smarted.

Two words: Bulldog clip. Lip.

^

Please. Tell us more.

Taking a loose-bottomed pie pan out of the oven by its base... the edge falling on a bare arm at 180C, do you burn or drop pie? I burned, and cursed!

Passing a gall stone (post gall bladder removal), I was howling with pain.

GP (late 60’s) tipped up at 11pm, half pissed, on his way home from the pub (this was before mobile phones, so he must have had his emergency calls transferred to the pub) took one look, said “pethedine”, jabbed a needle into my arm, then proceeded to scribble my details on the back of his fag packet. I was a very happy bunny !

Kidney stones. 5. Separate. Episodes. All behind me now thank goodness. (Also sympathy to the PP with the corneal abrasions)

Pleurisy. Hurts so much to breathe that you're not worried you might die. You desperately want to die now. Before the next breath.

Tooth abscess (I don't have children though so can't compare to that), was actually banging my head against the wall and sobbing as it just wouldn't stop.

Paper cut! Last time the pain was all consuming. Thought it would never end.

savagebaggagemaster same here i am forever catching my arms on the door frames it hurts so much. Last summer i spent all of it with bruises in random places down the backs of my arms the same as you only ever happens when arms are bare/t.shirt! X

Try buddy strapping your toe, OP, it should really help the pain

Jumping out of bed to answer the phone, stepped on plug of electric blanket (this was the 80’s). Never ever ever will I forget the slurp/suck noise my foot made when I pulled the three pin square plug out of it. It was so bad I vomited.

Nobody told me you kick a heavy football with the side of your foot. I did netball and hockey at school ffs! My toenail snapped about 4mm from the base. The underneath filled up with blood. The pain from the pressure and the snapped nail was worse than labour. Then I had the joy of having toenail *trefined.

trefined. For those who don’t know this is where a nurse heats up a needle and simultaneously pushes down/screws hot needle into nail trying to make a hole for blood to be released. My toenails on my big toes are quite thick - it took her fucking ages. Eventually she got through with a hard push - the needle went my toenail bee and only stopped when it hit the bone. I think* my screams emptied the doctors surgery.

Bed. Not bee. Toenail bed.

My dp once stood on the pointy end of a shavehook.

Barefoot.

This, is a shavehook.

Ahem. Quinsy.

Quinsy is terrible!!! Flashbacks!.

Dry socket + infection
Gallstone attacks
Sinusitis
Catching my top lip in my coat zip

Something else about which I'm in denial because it definitely didn't happen to me...

I had 4 inch wide very sturdy sticking-plaster like material up the length of my leg on the sides when being treated for a fractured femur. I'd developed an allergy to it (think suppuration soaking through many layers of bandages and the skin resembling major burns).

When the bandages and 'sticking plaster' were being removed it brought skin off - in some areas, not just the blistered/burned skin but the exudate stuck enough that in some places is stripped the skin down the full depth...

I jumped from the third rung of a stepladder into an upturned plug. Right in the middle of the sole of the foot. The only foot pain worse was breaking my big toe kicking somebody's thigh by accident. I left them with a dent that took years to heal and my big toe was never quite the same.

Managing to shut your ear in your car door. I did this twice whilst pregnant with ds2...and also shut the door on my head a few times.

Cold-waxing your own armpits