To think this is one of the most painful things you can do.

[sweeneytoddsrazor]

Stub your toe. Stubbed little toe earlier on the table leg. Of course no shoes or slippers on to cushion the blow. Air very quickly turned blue followed by toe turning a lovely shade of bluey/purple. Nice 9 hour shift later and it is bloody agony.

delboysskinandblister

Doctors obviously need more training with those contraptions

Long needles into the back of the throat to drain a quinsy. And the pain when my brother opened the door hard into my foot and my big toe nail scrunched right up. Had to have it taken off. Ugh.

My mum put oil of olbas in her eyes thinking it was eye drops. She then drove herself to a&e and was pulled over by the cops who she screamed at so badly so apologised and let her go. Obviously she drove to the wrong hospital and was banging on the door of the maternity unit.

^they apologised.

@greeneyedlulu

I hear THAT!

Oh graphista how awful and comic! You're not the first...also guilty of similar, not quite such dramatic results, and not the last now pencil skirts enjoying a comeback

DH picked up a splinter whilst vigorously sanding the bannisters. I say splinter, it was several millimetres thick and went clean through his little and ring finger impaling both to his middle finger. I couldn’t leave the DC so he had to drive himself to A&E where he was visited (visited, note, not treated) by a succession of hospital staff who had heard of his arrival and come to see for themselves. He said he felt like the baby Jesus.

The pain started when the shock wore off and was apparently excruciating. DH is a lot braver than me for Major Incidents. Not so much on the day to day minor ailments.

Also I shove my foot backwards when I was hoovering on knees (so toenails facing down) and managed to get a load of laminate flooring under my toenail. I had to pull it all out myself, absolutely caked in blood. It’s always big toes with me.

@Ngaio2 actual tears of laughter here hedgehog?!

Bejeeezzus, fanny in speculum mechanism,!! Ouchy bloody ouch...

Recently, a few times, mid-sex, hip kinda 'locking'?! Any other hip-lockers out there, so agony and have to jump about to twist hip..dead romantic!

Smother I raise my hand!

I was almost there, so clamped my jaw and carried on anyway. Afterwards (and it did take a little longer than usual!) I couldn't walk right for three days. DP uses this story occasionally to imply the obvious. :D

@Smotheroffive yup raising my hand here too!!

Apparently shouting "get off get off fucking get off me" isn't the best way to end sex.... especially when your 9 year old comes running in to find out what's happening

Yeah! cricket that sounds ohso familiar!! I could not achieve anything or bear to even try, when it happens it would all be fruitless and too painful to not react like that to! How on gods earth could you continue?! Oh the pain!

Thighofrelief 😱 your poor mum!

I love olbas oil (crappy sinuses) but even when I've done that stupid thing of drops on the pillow and just the VAPOURS ending up in my eyes was bad enough!

Smotheroffive - I know! I think there's a few YouTube clips of people doing similar. Dd was headed to an 80's party last year (how fucking old that made me feel!) wearing a shocking pink pencil skirt - I told her my cautionary tale and she responded with great sympathy & compassion by crying laughing! Kids!

"I was almost there, so clamped my jaw and carried on anyway" 😂 attagirl!

Ex once thought I was crying out in pleasure (not bloody likely!) he was leaning on my hair!

Fallopian Tube rupture followed by several hours of bleeding out.

Also, lung collapse. Far more painful than a stubbed toe

Pah! Trapping your finger in a fire door at work, or having a gall stone pass along your common bile duct, or breaking your leg in 2 places, or rupturing your calf muscle... take your pick!

Oweeee, ow, unicorns!

Having ovary punctured with needle!

That to all of those too slipper