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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I’ve done something very stupid (work related)

224 replies

NewYearsSleeve · 05/01/2019 23:59

I work for a small business from my employers home office & I hate it. I’ve been working with a recruitment agency for a while trying to find something different. The agency sent my CV to another small business with my agreement but I’ve just found out the owner of the other business is friends with my boss. I’ve got an angry message from my boss asking me what I’m doing looking for another job as she thought we were friends and telling me not to expect a reference. WIBU not to go in on Monday? My boss can be intimidating & bullies people. (One of the reasons I hate working for her).

OP posts:
PattiStanger · 06/01/2019 12:02

Poutysprout - exactly but it seems that the majority of posters are unaware that not every post has to be phrased an an AIBU

daisychain01 · 06/01/2019 12:03

Poutysprout Grin there is a lot of "made up stuff" dressed up as fact, which does more harm than good.

My head has been banging on the table reading some of it! I just hope the OP takes her situation to ACAS via their helpline, and they will give free advice and support her in her next steps, otherwise it could be very confusing.

DGRossetti · 06/01/2019 12:08

If op is looking for new job through agency, then she is giving her consent to pass on her details to prospective employers. So they’re not necessarily breaking gdpr laws.

But that consent is strictly limited to exactly what the agency will do with the personal data. And I can't see their GDPR consent form covering "approaching your current employer without your permission".

That's the whole point of GDPR. You can't "assume" consent. And if you don't have it explicitly you are liable (with a fine) for the breach. That's in tandem with data protection laws.

Even before GDPR, I had some run-ins with agencies that misused my personal data. The most common being using my details - submitted because I was recruiting - to try and poach me as a candidate. Seems there's an idea that you can get away with anything if you dismiss it with a tinkly little laugh .....

Sparky888 · 06/01/2019 12:15

Come up with a really good reason why you want a new job, that flatters your boss, and that she can buy into and tell herself eg distance, hours, type of work eg needing less of a challenge! Or really needing more money because of x and knowing your current employer shouldn’t be expected to pay more etc. I find that bosses buy something like that really easily as it comforts them that ‘it’s isnt them’ and they are really good, it gives them something to tell others, and they come round to it. Good luck x

daisychain01 · 06/01/2019 12:33

OMG if I felt people had to come up with excuses to flatter my over-inflated ego, I'd know I had failed in life Grin

By the way big news flash there are still a significant number of companies who are still non-GDPR compliant in even the most basic principles.

My DH took one company to task for not complying to the principle of "opt in" rather than "opt out" and as told, ah yes sir, that's because it was a "soft opt-in" - um, no such thing, made up on the spot, blagged it.

It's a mockery - the ICO must feel like it's "wacka-mole"

Tistheseason17 · 06/01/2019 12:37

@daisychain01
Try speaking to the ICO - different answers every time you call! They also don't take breach reports from 3rd parties. If a company is breaching GDPR they are expected to "self" report. Hilarious, really (not in a good way!)

iseecabbages · 06/01/2019 16:14

rossetti my comment was referring to the recruitment agency, as in consent would have been given by the op to share relavent info with prospective employers, some people on here seem to think the agency is at fault, when it’s the sole trader/ business they shared the info with that are in breach.

i doubt there would be much mileage in trying to pursue a claim against the sole trader, she’ll just close ranks with bff and deny.

Original poster
NewYearsSleeve · 07/01/2019 13:24

Been sacked, in an awful public way (Screaming at me as I left down the street). Sad I feel shaken and sick.

I’ve tried to call recruitment agency but the agent I need to speak to is off sick. I have explained what happened to their manager who said she would look into it and put me forward for anything suitable that comes up.

Now desperately searching job boards for any temp/ immediate start admin work. I’m also going to phone CAB but I don’t think much can be done.

OP posts:
NC0301191141 · 07/01/2019 13:48

You poor thing. I'd have been tempted to shout back "and you wonder why I was looking for another job?!"!

I hope you find something else soon, but please look at the positives - you won't have to deal with her again.

Let us know what CAB say. Try ACAS also - you must be entitled to pay for the days that you've worked since you were last paid.

If you've not already, stick your CV on CV Library too - it's free and you never know what might come up.

allthgoodusernamesaretaken · 07/01/2019 13:55

Hold your head high OP. None of this is down to you. Just very unlucky. I'm sure it'll work out OK in the end. These things often do

SuperSuperSuper · 07/01/2019 14:16

Awful OP, but I can't help feeling that you're better off away from her. Contact ACAS, make sure you're paid from 1-7th January.

SparkyBlue · 07/01/2019 14:35

You poor thing OP. At least you are away from that toxic environment.

notapizzaeater · 07/01/2019 14:50

And she no doubts wonders why you wanted to,leave

AWishForWingsThatWork · 07/01/2019 15:54

Sorry, OP.

I hope you find something better quickly. I think in the long run, you'll be massively relieved you're out of there. She sounds horrendous. And do follow through with the agency helping you find new work ... they have caused this.

Mummadeeze · 07/01/2019 17:34

Good luck with your job search. It is probably a massive blessing in disguise that this has happened. You shouldn’t have to put up with being treated so badly at work. There are ways round a reference, even being honest that your last boss was an abusive bully would hopefully not affect your chances of being employed if you can get a character reference from someone else.

RussellSprout · 07/01/2019 17:38

Sorry to hear you are going through this OP. I went through a similar situation in the Autumn, my boss found I was not happy ( I was new) went ape shit stopped speaking to me for a week then fired me (although her boss let me resign first).

It's shit and it sucks but you're better out than in. Job market is crap early Jan but should pick up soon. Good luck.

NatNoo · 07/01/2019 17:43

Absolutely what Notthequeen said. Under GDPR legislation the other small business owner had no right to divulge that they’d received your CV. You need to report this breach as it could financially impact you.
As regards the reference, the Accountant that payrolls you can confirm the dates your worked there. Additionally it’s illegal to refuse to give a reference so she’s talking out of her arse.
PS I work as a Recruitment Manager

ladycarlotta · 07/01/2019 18:04

Oh, OP, how awful. Nothing constructive to add but I hope you find something else soon, and I'm a bit glad you are away from that woman even if it puts you in a horrible position. Do continue to take the recruitment agency to task over it, this should not have happened.

SaturdayNext · 07/01/2019 18:04

Be grateful you need never deal with this awful woman again, and reflect on the fact that she's now inconvenienced by not having you there and is in practice never going to be able to keep employees for long.

Can you sign up with every recruitment and temp agency in your areas?

iano · 07/01/2019 18:06

Op I'm so sorry! Please call ACAS for advice. The other employer may also have breached GDPR rules. The agent also shouldn't have passed on your details. You should be talking to the manager about this as a complaint!
I hope you find a better role soon! Your boss is unhinged!!

Sara107 · 07/01/2019 18:08

I have found ACAS very helpful. They will give you step by step instructions on how to deal with tricky situations.

tickingthebox · 07/01/2019 18:17

You need to call the recruitment agency back and say you need compensation for what has happened.

Mitzimaybe · 07/01/2019 18:18

Does this not fall under the GDPR? Is it not a breach of your personal data for the second business owner to tell your boss?

(Apologies if already mentioned; I haven't RTFT)

Jaxhog · 07/01/2019 18:23

This is why I hate recruiters and the other employer was very unprofessional to do this. I would make the recruiter aware of what their client has done

This was completely unprofessional. Don't worry about a reference. She has to confirm you worked there if you did. Even if she bad mouths you to prosepctive employers, which I doubt she will. Getting a crap reference/no refererence is commoner than you might think. Just explain what happened.

Your best bet is to explain why you are looking for another job and try and work out a transition that works for both of you. She may try and sack you as you've been there less than a year. I'd get back to the recruiter and ask for their help in finding a new position ASAP.

OllyBJolly · 07/01/2019 18:38

Additionally it’s illegal to refuse to give a reference so she’s talking out of her arse . No it isn't

PS I work as a Recruitment Manager Really?