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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Fucking bitches

616 replies

LindaLa · 30/12/2018 11:39

Up until very recently (last night), I had a group of 4 very close friends.

I recently had an upset of a childhood (sexual) trauma that I've told no one about. One of my friends was here when this happened and I opened up to her, she was supportive and i felt great, lighter.

Last night we all meet for drinks and exchange gifts. We all exchange various supermarket vouchers and have done since our "babies" were babies.

She makes a comment about a paedofile arrest made near her and then says "surprised you don't know him Linda, you were paedofile fodder"
Other people laugh and start questioning me about what happened.

She has told them everything.

I being questioned in a bar. A crowded bar.

I have grabbed my things and left.

Took their things out of my car and left them on the kerb.
I have blocked them. Everywhere.

I have been to supermarkets and spent all the vouchers, put it all in the food bank.

Fuck them.

OP posts:
Mummyshark2018 · 30/12/2018 11:50

Wow I don't think I've heard something so disgusting in a long time- especially from an apparent friend. Sorry OP but you are better off without these people in your life.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 30/12/2018 11:50

Its bad enough at the best of times when people fire questions at you.

Chapterandverse · 30/12/2018 11:51

I am so so sorry.

With friends like that, who needs enemies?

What are you planning to do now? You were right to block them on everything, but I also think you need to take steps to prevent them spreading it further.

Have you taken action against the perpetrator of the original crime?

Teachtolive · 30/12/2018 11:51

Wow, inappropriate doesn't even cut it. What an out and out cow!

Kewcumber · 30/12/2018 11:51
Shock Flowers
Urbanbeetler · 30/12/2018 11:51

We’re they all party to appalling behaviour or were any of them just caught up in it? It sounds horrific and I hope you have some real life support,

Crazyladee · 30/12/2018 11:52

Jesus Christ that's disgusting!!

Petalflowers · 30/12/2018 11:52

Paedophile,fodder. That is vile.

People laughed at this. Also awful.

Had they not laughed, then I suppose it’s natural,to ask questions, but it’s your story to tell, not hers.

BearFoxBear · 30/12/2018 11:52

That's horrendous, I'm so sorry. Cut them out, fuck them.

Something similar happened to me and I have never spoken to my 'friend' again.

rwalker · 30/12/2018 11:52

Shocked at how cruel they were

animallikeyou · 30/12/2018 11:52

I have quite a dark sense of humour but that is ridiculous. I am so sorry.

planespotting · 30/12/2018 11:53

Wait a minute
And these people have children?

Even worse if it was possible

TheLastMermaid · 30/12/2018 11:53

I hope you have other kind people in your life OP and that you can be kind to yourself. Good for you for walking away and blocking them. What a disgusting way to behave by them. I imagine it's hard to reconcile what they've just done with the friends you thought you'd had all these years and that kind of loss can really hurt too. I hope you're ok x

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 30/12/2018 11:54

Jesus. They’re cunts. They really are (and I really never use that word)

Flowers I’m so so sorry.

Have you ever had counselling or spoken to a professional about what happened? Just trying to think of some way to make you feel better. Do you have any real life support?

Screw them. They’re utter shits. Don’t give them a second thought.

saffkey1 · 30/12/2018 11:54

Absolutely disgusting i am so sorry that a grown woman made light of chikd abuse and broke your trust.

Wigwambam10 · 30/12/2018 11:54

What totally bitches. Hope their stuff got nicked. Well done Op I salute you. I can’t believe anyone in that group thought that comment was ok and to laugh along well words fail me

Tink2007 · 30/12/2018 11:56

That’s absolutely horrendous :(

I’m so sorry OP.

Magpie18 · 30/12/2018 11:56

Unforgivable! I really hope you're ok & have some genuine support around you.

Love that you dumped their stuff too Flowers

Flashingbeacon · 30/12/2018 11:56

I can’t understand how you could see someone’s pain and think they’d be up for laughing about it. I mean it when I wouldn’t do it to someone I hated. To take someone biggest vulnerability and think it’s worthy of bar gossip.

This is why I can never open up to people. I’m so sorry for this happening to you. Women beware women.

Aeroflotgirl · 30/12/2018 11:56

Oh my god, sorry this has happened to you, and you have been betrayed by a friend you thought you could trust in the most horrible way. The 'friends' did not stand up for you or correct her, but joined in laughing at you. Massive hugs, as they say, New Year, new start. So sorry you found out how these 'friends' really were like.

Original poster
LindaLa · 30/12/2018 11:56

Thank you all Smile
I'm fine, really.

I actually felt bad about leaving their stuff on the street.

I tried counselling several times over the years but I don't think it's for me.

I just don't truly trust anyone and this has proved I can't.

I had to give all the food away, no way I could have anything from them in this house.

Real sickener is I've helped two of them through cancer scares,
One through divorce and the other through a breakdown and didn't say a word to anyone.

Fuck them again. They don't deserve me.

OP posts:
tinydancer88 · 30/12/2018 11:56

Bloody hell, takes a lot to shock me but that's awful. I've committed some blunders myself (quite a dark sense of humour and have misjudged before) but I can't understand why on earth anyone would think that was OK to say, and it doesn't sound as if she realised how awful it was when she heard herself say it and apologised, even!

I admire you for your response - sounds like you were decisive, and showed that you won't accept this sort of behaviour.

Serialweightwatcher · 30/12/2018 11:57

That's so awful, what a nasty piece of work that so called 'friend' is - I'm so sorry, you must feel so hurt .. good for you for getting rid of their shit from the car Flowers

Villanelley · 30/12/2018 11:57

FFS what is wrong with some people!

I'm so sorry, OP. Flowers

Bound · 30/12/2018 11:58

Utter bitches Flowers