Aibu to want xmas our way

[supermommyof4]

My children are between 13-20 years old, 2 of them are working quite late tonight.
We usually have a very relaxed xmas day and get up when we are all ready, as we see no reason to rush the day.
Now without any discussions Dp has informed me Ex is dropping dss off at 10 am xmas morning, i am annoyed as my xmas day now has to run to her timetable.
Dss is 11 and more than capable of either waiting till later on in the day or boxing day.
Mine have waited before as their dad isnt always here over xmas.
Am i wrong to feel annoyed that i wasnt included or even asked about arrangements. My kids will not be awake at 10am i guarantee it. Dd1 is working till 7 tonight and ds1 is working till 10/11.
They have both worked all week and are both entitled to a lie in.

Why can’t they have a lie in? I’m betting they will get up when they want to get up and not when Dss appears

Does your DP want to see his child on Xmas morning?

YABU. Just because some of your kids will be in bed doesn't mean your partners child cannot spend xmas with him!
10am is a very late lie in, even if going to bed at 11.30.

Surely your Dp will get up to see his son (I don't think 10am is overly early) and your teenagers can get up when they want?

Let your DH get up with his child.

Everyone else can lie in. Doesn't have to change your plans at all

Well they can have a lie in anyway can't they? 7pm finishing isn't really late in my view but surely they can get up when they want.

DP can be out of bed at 9.55am to let him in and keep him entertained until you and the others appear. Let him know to bring something to do. No-one else needs to get up early or change their plans and maybe Ex or DSS thought DP would be keen to see him?!

Shocked tbh that you think an 11 year old child should be told he is capable of waiting to see his Dad until Boxing Day because his Dad's girlfriend's kids need a lie in. If I was your DP I'd be furious with you.

I'd hope a 20yo woukd acknowledge an 11yo's needs trump hers on Christmas day tbh.

Is there a backstory here? SOunds like you aren't keen on dss appearing at all?

I feel sorry for the DSS. You sound selfish.

I’m a bit surprised you’ve all left it this late to discuss arrangements for when and where an 11 year old spends Xmas.

Let everyone have the lie in they need and your DP can get up for his boy.

Is it more to do with the fact that you were looking forward to a day with ‘just us’? Rather than the time.

Step parenting must be hard but it’s not the boys fault and he has every right to be with his dad.

Annoying that you were told last minute but there it is, make the best of it.

Oh come on it’s not like the child will arrive at 5am ffs, 10am is a perfectly reasonable time

Your kids get to see him Xmas day so why should the child he is actually Dad too have to wait until Boxing Day? Disgusting attitude

Your dc can lie in if they wish 🤷🏻‍♀️ I doubt they will be missed by your step child as they can enjoy time alone with there dad

YABU. Your DP is the only one who has to get out of bed for his son. Your DP is able to see his son and his son wants to see him, what's the problem? Don't be spiteful towards a child. Just because your children didn't get to see their dad on Christmas Day doesn't mean your DPs son shouldn't.

Yabu, ridiculous and selfish.

10am is a very late lie in, even if going to bed at 11.30.

What rubbish! That's such a judgemental comment and isn't even particularly relevant to the OP's question.

OP I can't see why your kids can't still have a lie-in, DSS coming over doesn't have to change that. And I'd have been ticked off not to have been consulted too.

I normally think that step parents get a rough ride on here but YABU in the extreme.
This is your DPs child that you're treating like an inconvenience so that your adult children can lie in their beds all day. 10am isn't especially early.

YABU because your DSS deserves to see his dad when he wants to and it's quite mean to say he should be happy to 'wait'. And your kids will no doubt stay in bed until they want to get up anyway.

But on general principles YANBU to be annoyed at having arrangements announced to you rather than be involved in discussing them. I'd tear a strip off DP for that.

You sound a bit precious OP. How would you feel if you child had to wait until Boxing Day to see you?

YABU, poor kid. Your kids can still lay in, what's the problem?

10am is a layin in my house, can’t help but feel sorry for dss.

Your dc’s may be thrilled the dsb is arriving at a decent time in the morning. Stop being mardy.

Poor bloody kid.

This is a ridiculous thing to get annoyed about. Why does your DP's child coming over mean that your adult DCs can't have a lie in? What a non-issue. Are you always this controlling or is there some sort of backstory that explains why you've overreacted?