Absolutely Raging at DSis

[DroningOn]

DSis and her DH were at a wedding yesterday, we had their DD1 and DS3 overnight. We've got a panto today at 1:30 for me, DH and our 2 kids.

DSis knows of our plans and has just text to say that both her and DH had too much to drink last night and can't drive until at least mid afternoon. They're 90 mins away so that's today's plans fucked up. Obvs not an AIBU but I am incandescent with rage at the moment.

AAAARGH!

Jenniferturkington

So they took an opportunity to have an extra few hours childfree. With a 1 and 3 year old, who can blame them.

You may want to RTT.

Anything that has a negative knock effect to others in the family shouldn't be done, especially if its avoidable.

But the bright-side is that it has bitten the Dsis on the arse as now no-one from her side of the family will have the piss taken out of them again.

They were more than 'selfish' they deliberately fucked up.ops family day out just to keep drinking until 4 am!

Thats not acceptable in any situation.

Since when does dumpung your kids to get paralytic trump another person's anticipated and paid for Xmas treat?

Droningon - well done for having a word with your sister, and sorry that she still couldn't really see what she'd done wrong (like some other posters on here!!)

I do love that your SIL jumped in and said "no" when your sis said she would ask them to do the babysitting for the Irish wedding though, good for her too!

Your BIL seems to be more human and less selfish, but he'd need to stand up to your sis more to be much use.

Well done for keeping the PJs - cheeky fuckers don't deserve presents! Hope you do manage to get the money for the wasted panto ticket, but if you don't, at least you have new PJs out of the situation.

think her in-laws will pick up the overnight duties for Ireland.

There are no 'duties' for grandparents, those are for parents.

Reading many MN threads cheers me up, we seem to have a relatively normal set up, we love having the grandchildren to stay, a night or a few weeks if necessary and as long as we feel we can manage for our health and their safety we'll continue to do so.
What's that betting that distance will lend enchantment and you have them in June for the Ireland wedding???

Sooo selfish and entitled, thinking what she wants is more important than you.
In a few months I would agree to do the Ireland babysitting, make a big song and dance about forgiveness and the importance of family. Make her think you’ve moved past it.
Then book a trip away a few days before and have “problems getting home”. But then again I am a bit evil...

Well done OP and enjoy the new pjs.

Hope you stick to your plans not to babysit for the Ireland trip. Unless your Dsis makes a genuine apology.

No, even if your dsis makes a genuine apology, don't babysit. Make sure she feels the consequences of her actions.

It doesn't mean she can't go to the wedding, just she'll have to pay for a flight for dn1, and a babysitter in Ireland for the day/night (We did this for a childfree wedding in Ireland, a qualified Nanny cost €150 For the day until 11pm), and I had to stay sober so I could do breakfast duties. (It was DHs uni mate getting married so felt it fairer if he got to have the big night)

I still can't believe they haven't offered to pay for the missed ticket, although with the age of her dcs, does she think it's cost wise similar to the cinema? (They will probably be too young to go yet).

Has someone explained it's usually £25-30 a ticket for a professional panto? That it's a big deal to miss it.

Unless your Dsis makes a genuine apology.

Apologies aren’t worth shit from people who are manipulative. The consequence of screwing people over is that they would be sensible to avoid being screwed over again. Mere words don’t change that.

Agreed, regardless of apologies, do NOT give in.

But equally do not pretend to give in and then fuck her over - that just drops you to her level, and however satisfying it might feel, you lose any moral high ground and she will trash you to all friends and family forever more.

Just stick to your decision that you're not doing it.

Your sister sounds quite spoilt and selfish-does she take the piss with other people? Your parents? Her friends?

Very selfish of them, Droning. Gosh, they must have sunk several glasses (or 18) of wine between them. Sincerely hope they both get the mortifying hangovers they certainly deserve!

And - since I DO believe in revenge - why not discreetly start a nice anonymous rumour that she's a lush and he's regularly partial to three hour liquid lunches......

"to which Sue who was listening in from the kitchen wandered in and blankly said you can ask but the answer will be no, you'll not have the chance to take the piss out of us like that"

Ha!

Love it!

I'm sure that a lot of people would mind a couple of extra hrs for a couple who have a rare chance of some time away together.

Not when it means that someone can't attend a planned event with their own family though.

Just saw your update Op. It's good to see you and your db were frank with your dsis. It's better to get things out in the open, rather than let it fester.

And it's not that sodding rare, if they're planning a weekend away for another wedding in June. . .

Evil genius @RedRedBluee I love that plan.

But have they agreed to pay for the ticket at the very least?

Brava OP.
Happy New Year!