To give my son a potato for Christmas?

[eefa658]

Have lurked for about a year but finally made an account to ask this as I've had mixed reactions from friends and my DM...

DS 3 is a biter. We have tried EVERYTHING to get him to stop. Final straw was the other day when he tried to bite his 3 month old sister (he didn't manage to as I grabbed him) I had warned him last time he bit me that Santa would see and for every time he bit anybody from now on Santa would replace a present with a potato. He didn't listen, and tried to bite DD. I've told him that Santa has seen and one of his presents is now a potato.

I HATE not following through on punishments. I'm inclined just to wrap up a potato and chuck it in his stocking and then when he opens it on Christmas Day remind him that he was warned. I'm not going to throw away any of his presents, so he's not actually going to miss out he will just think he has.

DM and a few friends think I'm horrible. DH, DF and a few other friends think it's a great idea.

WIBU to do this? I'm running out of ideas to get him to stop and I really am losing the will to live over it. Please feel free to also offer tips on how you stopped your child biting...

@SnapAndFartAllDayLong can't do elf on the shelf because the little fucker's face scares the living daylights out of me. I had a nightmare about him last week!

If you don't it is like Santa condoning biting.

@LadyPasserine I would like to think Santa isn't a biter. Haven't seen him in a while though so not sure.

OP, if it's any consolation my DS was a terrible biter when he was about 3. Random strangers & kids in playgroups etc.

I took a VERY firm line on it, always removed him from the situation, made a big fuss of his victim while ignoring DS, etc.

Anyway, no idea if it was my parenting skills or he just grew out of it, but he is now a very charming & popular 17 year old.

So don't worry too much!

Phahahaha OP this is my first year doing it and every night this week I've got into bed then realised I hadn't moved the bloody elf 😂😂😂

I would go through with it he won't be scarred for life, he is getting gifts!

Why are you spending £200 on a 3 year old? Seems like something is off in the household. Perhaps your ds needs more attention in a way that he's not getting since his sister was born? If punishing him isn't working maybe you need to try another strategy. It sounds like the biting is getting him lots of attention (in a negative way) and you need to change up the dynamic.

Terrible idea. Truly.
Teach him the words to use instead of biting!

IS it only you and DD that he bites? Does he bite DH?

From what you've said on here, he does it because he gets a reaction from you, and he wants that reaction because it is giving him attention each time. When he does bite you should give him a firm no and walk away from him and ignore him for a minute or two. Then find something the two of you can do together, jigsaw or whatever and give him a sticker for playing so nicely. Then repeat this over and over. Eventually he will learn that biting = no attention, and playing nicely gets lots of happy smiling praise.

I had similar with my DD when I had my DS, but she used to hit him instead of bite.

So if you've already made up your mind to do it op then why ask on here?

I have a 2 year old biter. If he was old enough to understand this I'd totally do it. If it has a positive affect and stops him then please let us know!

The message should be that biting hurts people and that's why he shouldn't do it. Not that he shouldn't bite because he'll end up with potatoes instead of presents. I'm not sure he'll get the right message from doing this way at 3.

Do it x

Give him a potato and a Mr Potato Head kit?

@SofiaAmes Lego is v expensive. This is the first time I've spent more than £100 on him for Christmas. Thanks for your concern about the price of his Christmas presents though!

@Kittykat93 I just wanted some other parent's opinions before I committed to it?

@KingBobra I might give that a go! Thanks!

Genius!

I'd do it. I always, always followed up on my threats.

I've ended up with four rather lovely grown up lads.

I'd do it. But be prepared for the potato to become his most favourite present ever, because kids are weird!

My eldest girl is the same age as your son. Tbh if she unwrapped a potato I think she’d find it hilarious 🙄 she would also tell EVERYONE that she got a potato from Santa without mention of the £200 worth of other gifts!

I also need to know what kind of potato you’re thinking of using. I’d suggest a baking potato for this task.

@MissyCooper baking potato. I don't think a new potato sends the right message.

I know that some parts of potato are toxic (leaves). Was trying to find a good reliable source about eating actual potato but didn’t really. sites refer to stomach problems for eating it because we cannot digest it. Also potential toxicity particularly for green or sprouting potato.

This came from live strong. Can anyone else clarify?

www.livestrong.com/article/523041-the-risks-of-eating-raw-potatoes/

100% do It! You should always follow through with a threat or there's no point and he will carry on.
Also I think it will be a funny story in a few years "do you remember the year you got a potato cos you tried to bite your sister?!"
Another one I saw on Facebook was - get empty wrapped up boxes and when your kid misbehaves chuck a box in the fire...now that would traumatise him!! I'm not suggesting you do that by the way!

He is 3.
A deferred punishment isn't going to work.
It needs to immediate and linked to the actual act at the time, and be a consistent thing every time. Removal, reminder, time out etc.

Why would you want to remind him if something long forgotten in the middle of the excitement of Christmas Day? And what even is the point? It'll either upset him in the middle of a happy family moment, or he will he bewildered and not have a clue what's actually going on, and it most likely won't have any further impact in terms of him not biting again next time. Pointless.