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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate my tight-arsed colleagues?

192 replies

JumperJapes · 21/12/2018 14:34

NC as outing.

AIBU to absolutely despise my colleagues? We had a Christmas Jumper Day last week, £2 suggested donation to local charity. About 60-70 staff on site, about 80% wore jumpers. Charity box in staff room.
We raised £32.
How can people wear the jumpers, join in on the fun but not put a couple of quid in for charity? How mean and tight can you be?

OP posts:
paxillin · 21/12/2018 15:49

Is it such an enormous treat to wear a Christmas jumper? Suggested donation £2 is just that, a suggestion. £1 for Christmas jumper day is the going rate here.You want to label people who can't afford £2 this by lack of Christmas jumper?

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 21/12/2018 15:49

£2 is nothing to most adults.

I think you need to start living in the real world. £2 is fortune to some people.

feelliketomhanks · 21/12/2018 15:50

£2 is a lot. I'd give £1 and wear the jumper. I hate those kind of things at the best of times. I don't have a xmas jumper so it would cost me more than £2

Original poster
JumperJapes · 21/12/2018 15:50

Adaline you might want to tell that to Children in Need, Red Nose Day, Pink for Breast Cancer.... It clearly works on less miserable people than yourself.

OP posts:
Thentherewascake · 21/12/2018 15:52

I am senior enough in the company that I need to pretend I am following with the fun. I have told the relevant people that I think it's bollocks, but it would be inappropriate to tell the staff that I think senior whoever is being ridiculous with their jumpers.
So I do wear one, but I am not paying.

Eilaianne · 21/12/2018 15:52

You don't get to judge whether people can afford it from their taxed wages !

Totally unreasonable.

Maybe it's the 15th time this month they'd been asked for "just" £2, maybe they are in financial difficulty and don't have spare cash, maybe they just don't carry cash any more, or maybe they're just mean, or don't give to charities they don't actively support... None of your business OP.

Go beg somewhere else than the workplace.

adaline · 21/12/2018 15:52

No, not miserable, just don't like being told how much I have to donate to charity!

adaline · 21/12/2018 15:53

I'm an adult, if I want to donate £5 or 50p that's my choice - you can't dictate to other adults how to spend their money! You tried to raise money and you managed to raise £32 - better than nothing, so why not be happy with what you DID raise, rather than bitch that it's not enough?

purpleface · 21/12/2018 15:54

Hm, how deserving is this hospice? I ask because I have known some very dubious and undeserving charities, including a lovely seeming nursing home. So I prefer to do my own research and not hand over my hard-earned cash to random charities just because of social pressure.

In my experience not taking part/wearing the jumper would definitely have been noted by bosses and got you an invisible black mark, whereas not putting money in the tin might have gone unnoticed. Easy solution, wear the jumper and if asked lie like hell and claim to have contributed.

Honestly, it seems people hear "it's for charity" and their brain falls out. Bah! Humbug!

Pinknike · 21/12/2018 15:55

Yabu, for all the reasons people have already said.

£2 in itself may not seem a lot, but in the last couple of weeks I've had to give around £40 out in £1 and £2 here and there to my children's schools, things at work and so on.

I already gave to Christmas jumper day at 2x children's schools, I'll be damned if I'm giving it at work as well.

Eilaianne · 21/12/2018 15:57

We have someone like the op at work, always demanding sponsorship for xyz colleague or dress down days at work (in a casual dress code office). She literally has nothing better to do than go around individually talking to people at their desk to ask if they've donated yet -wildly inappropriate because I always say no.

I actually have a direct debit to two charities, one of which is the work sponsor one, but don't think I (or anyone) should be grilled by the team admin staff on why we're not donating another bloody quid this week! It's totally unlike anything in previous offices where I've worked.

Original poster
JumperJapes · 21/12/2018 15:59

Only on MN where the average salary seems to be £100k+ and people get 50% salary Christmas bonuses, can £2 also be a fortune.
My annoyance with my colleagues is the fact they did wear the jumper but didn't donate, not that they didn't donate.

OP posts:
adaline · 21/12/2018 16:00

My annoyance with my colleagues is the fact they did wear the jumper but didn't donate, not that they didn't donate.

But why is that so important? If they hadn't worn the jumper you still wouldn't have raised any more money than you did Confused

GirlFliesHome · 21/12/2018 16:01

This may come as a surprise, but Christmas is an expensive time of year for alot of people.

And it is not 'just' your £2. It is the £2 pound here and there for the DCs to join in at school, plus the £ suggested donation for the christmas cake fundraiser, plus the £5 pound per child cost of the ticket for todays Christmas schoo,l lunch 'But it's going to charidee' plus my work's secret santa with the suggested limit of £10 plus DH's work's secret santa plus plus plus plus plus.

Plus our family annual Christmas donation (Street vets this year...) plus christmas cards to all and sundry plus presents to everyone.

So your 'it's only £2) is actually just the last in a very long line of; 'but it's only...'

nicoala1 · 21/12/2018 16:03

Cash donations in a bucket or an envelope can go anywhere really. Sorry for sounding so cynical.

But there we are.

Moneypenny007 · 21/12/2018 16:05

We had a Christmas jumper day last week maybe 20-25 donated what we could 400quid was raised.
They are tight arses

BoneyBackJefferson · 21/12/2018 16:09

You must have made so much effort for this to happen.

A word with the boss.
An email to all staff.
A bucket in the staff room.

The hardship.

SneakyGremlinsBrokeTheSleigh · 21/12/2018 16:10

The "well they bought a jumper so they have money" argument doesn't work.

I've owned one jumper for six years. Couldn't afford another though.

Jackshouse · 21/12/2018 16:11

Which charity was it?

badlydrawnperson · 21/12/2018 16:11

OP if you hate your colleagues I hope you haven't mentioned it in front of any children -

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3457263-Hate-in-front-of-children

TrippingTheVelvet · 21/12/2018 16:12

A lot of people, myself included had to scrape the fiver together to buy the cheapest, crappiest Christmas jumper in B&M so they don't look like the Grinch that isn't a team player. Also had to buy buns for the Xmas bake sale for charity, buy them back from it, buy a Secret Santa present and bring in sweeties for the office party. Oh and also buy ballots for the charity raffle we did. All those couple of pounds soon add up and whilst dubbed as optional, you look like a twat if you don't.

MyLearnedFriend · 21/12/2018 16:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
JumperJapes · 21/12/2018 16:18

Boney your post makes no sense. Where on this thread am I bemoaning the effort I've made?

Badlydrawn Grin

OP posts:
adaline · 21/12/2018 16:19

Tight bastards

Yeah, how dare they do exactly what they want with their own money, cheeky gits!

Punto1 · 21/12/2018 16:22

I absolutely loathe work charity shite. My preferred method of donating to charity is giving coins to homeless people sitting on the ground while the great suited and booted pass by. The reason I do that is personal.
Do you know how many homeless people died on the streets last year in Britain? 6 thousand. 6 THOUSAND people. That could well be your local guy or girl who you don't notice around anymore.

Every fucking week at my work, there's some gobshite hiking the Himalayas or cycling (massively popular with men over 40) 100 miles for charity or something. Fuck off. You can well afford the measly 100 quid you 'raise' while you feel all altruistic donning your lycra you hypocritical muppet. Usually the directors too. Would think nothing of 100 quid on a new suit (probably only buy the arse in their expensive trousers), but we're all expected to participate in this forced charity nonsense to not look like a miser.

I'll give money to who I feel like giving it to thank you very much.