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Original poster

Christmas do cheaters!

333 replies

youcanthandlethetruth · 13/12/2018 15:28

Just curious as to whether this is the norm

One woman I work with is having an affair with two married men in our office. Which she and they have since admitted to. Notably was seen getting into a taxi with both following the Christmas do!

On the same night of the Christmas do, another woman kissed a man who just got married last month. Seen kissing a few times in front of everyone! When I asked her about it she said “awk it’s just one of the those things.” She also cheated on her partner earlier in the year with a different man we work with.

Another younger girl who just started in the office last month is also suspected of being overly friendly with another married man. Everyone suspects an affair but this has never been confirmed.

Thing is - none of their partner’s know. I know this for a fact from various conversations throughout the year.

And my male boss has admitted to fancying someone else in our office. He always says that if he got the chance to have a night with her he’d take it (again he has been married for a long time)

Am I the only faithful person out there. How do people do this with no conscience. I would feel wick if I did that on my dp.

OP posts:
HopefullyAnonymous · 13/12/2018 16:51

Police officer here. It’s a year round thing in my job not just reserved for Christmas. Everyone is at it.

mbosnz · 13/12/2018 16:52

I was in a rather major department store yesterday, for quite some time, over all the floors. Their work function was the night before. Perhaps they should, um, moderate their post function conversation when out amongst customers - I could feel my eyebrows meeting my hairline at times, lol.

(I was sooooo tempted to join in when 'Janet' was asking 'John' if he'd heard what Anne had done and who with, as I'd just heard all about Anne and Michael from Kate who was talking with 'Steven' when behind me on the escalator, and in homewares, lol). . .

Orange6904 · 13/12/2018 16:52

Meant to say I'm glad at least it bothers you op, seems no-one batted an eyelid at my exes christmas do last year. Confused

sulflower · 13/12/2018 16:53

It happened all the time in one of my workplaces. Partners were never invited to any work do. I went to one, that was enough. In fact there were so many in work affairs it was unreal. I remember one married colleague sending an email to the married man she was having an affair with, unfortunately for her she'd sent it to her entire group by mistake. She was out of the country on business and desperately tried to get another manager in-house to ask her group to let her access their email so she could delete it. Everyone quite rightly refused.

Orange6904 · 13/12/2018 16:53

@mbosnz It doesn't begin with D does it Xmas Shock

Mrskeats · 13/12/2018 16:55

Finance is famous this. A guy I know was having an affair with three different women in one company. Obvs he was married too.
Not really seen it in my profession much (teaching)

AdamNichol · 13/12/2018 16:56

Police officer here
Isn't there a bit of a thing for people in high risk/danger employment to have something of a compartmentalised work / home life?

As a former teacher turned Civil Servant, there were only ever a handful of colleagues with whom an evening out could be regarded as a pleasant experience. The idea of boning away with one due to opportunity sends a bit of a shudder down my spine; regardless of relationship statuses.

Cherry321 · 13/12/2018 16:57

@AdamNichol - I work for a major energy supplier - sounds like my lot. Xmas Blush

3WildOnes · 13/12/2018 16:57

I’ve never seen anyone cheat on a partner at a work do. I have two jobs One working therapeutically with parents of babies and one working with children. I guess they’re not the kind of roles where it would be acceptable to openly cheat.
My husband is an accountant. I’ll have to ask what it’s like in his team!

Sadik · 13/12/2018 17:00

I've obviously worked in the right (wrong?) places Grin Previous career work does were always very drunken, but never any bad behaviour beyond random silliness along the lines of terrible karaoke or ridiculous dancing, not extra-marital affairs.

These days I'm in a very tiny company, so Christmas dos are a nice lunch together. But I do go to lots of work-related wider events, and again plenty of bad dancing and worse jokes after a few beers, but that's the extent of it!

SuperSuperSuper · 13/12/2018 17:00

I wouldn't say it's rife or tacitly accepted where I've worked, but it's happened. Not loads of cases, but enough.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 13/12/2018 17:00

I can't imagine touching any of my work colleagues. I like them well enough as colleagues but I went to the loo when the 'goodbye kissing' started and didn't come out till it was finished. Urgh.

Why are some people so keen to put their hands and goodness knows what, on people they work with? Shock

==
MrsMWA, silly question but why not just divorce if you feel like that? If your husband had been posting, saying the same that you did, he'd be told to show you some respect and end the marriage.

mbosnz · 13/12/2018 17:01

@sausage101, no, more of a 'J'. . .Grin

DonaldDucksTowel · 13/12/2018 17:02

Oh well this is all very reassuring - my DP works in finance 😟

smore · 13/12/2018 17:03

I think as a rule you see the absolute worst of your coworkers at Xmas parties.

I think it encourages people who don't normally drink to get absolutely hammered and a kind of Las Vegas attitude to bad behaviour ... I've had some truly shocking ones (IT).

mbosnz · 13/12/2018 17:03

Oh, and I have never cheated on DH. I don't count being groped, pawed, and one notable time BITTEN, as cheating - at said work events.

I trust DH implicitly, not to engage either. The deal is that whoever leaves or gets booted out has to take the kids. That keeps us very together, lol. . .

HopefullyAnonymous · 13/12/2018 17:05

Isn't there a bit of a thing for people in high risk/danger employment to have something of a compartmentalised work / home life?

There’s a lot of bonding between colleagues over shared (often unpleasant) experiences. It’s easy to become extremely close to someone at work and persuade yourself that your partner wouldn’t understand. That and the fact that shift work is pretty much incompatible with family life, and your absence is easily explained. I think if there are any cracks in your existing relationship then the job just adds huge strain.

smore · 13/12/2018 17:05

Won't be able to look my accountant in the eye now though, who would have thought it?!

cuppycakey · 13/12/2018 17:07

Has been common absolutely everywhere I have ever worked, in many different industries.

Thatsalovelycuppatea · 13/12/2018 17:08

No you aren't. I have never cheated. Some people are just dicks

abacucat · 13/12/2018 17:10

Never happened as far as I know anywhere I have worked.

MirandaGoshawk · 13/12/2018 17:12

No, it's not normal IME. There were a couple of affairs, of course, but it wasn't a general copping off for the night when alcohol involved, AFAIK.

I wonder what Teresa May gets up to in Brussells with Jean-Claud Juncker? All those overnight sessions. And as for that hussy Angela Merkel, the dominatrix...

WorraLiberty · 13/12/2018 17:12

It'd be interesting to know how many MNetters have copped off at a work's party and what made them do it?

LaurieFairyCake · 13/12/2018 17:13

I'm going to do a study on this as everyone I meet (as a therapist) reports this of their profession - banking/law/insurance/accountancy/IT....

All at it like rabbits

Local govt and central not so much

ceciliaP · 13/12/2018 17:14

It is very common in my industry. My now marriage started as a work affair. At Christmas there were certainly no partners. The worst has to be sales teams. They outdo even the finance guys.

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