Messaged friends at 0740 this morning

[Idontlikecheesecake]

We’re moving house and had an offer accepted yesterday so im very excited. I was looking through my phone when i woke up this morning and thought id told my friends in a group chat, but i hadnt so i sent them a message. It was 0740, a time when most people are getting up/already up getting ready for work or getting kids ready for school etc so I thought it was ok.

Only one friend had seen it and she sent me a message saying ‘couldnt you have sent this a bit later when we’re more awake?’ I joked that im on the night shift tonight so i could send a message at 3am, and then she actually had a go at me over messenger (she even swore) saying how she got kicked in the leg by a horse and wanted to have a lie in and it wasn’t the right time for her phone to be pinging all the time.

I just said I wasn’t to know she’d been injured, it was a reasonable time as lots of people are getting ready for work etc, and if she didnt want to be disturbed she shpuld have her phone on silent or whatever. To which she replied she doesn’t normally get messages at that time so why should she? She then removed herself from the group and sent a mutual friend a messaged saying i had annoyed her.

It just feels like a really petty and childish argument. To me it feels like she’s dictating to everyone else when we should be sending messages and shes speaking for them about what a reasonable time should be. And im annoyed that she had a go at me over something so petty

Its also not just this argument. Shes blamed me for stuff before. Like just after Christmas we were all going round a friends house for takeaway and she wanted to go put for a meal, and she didnt want to come because i had upset her. All i did was explain to her that we cant really afford to go out for a meal and a takeaway is easier because of childcare etc

She also often declines invites to do things or cancels at the last minute wih some crappy excus. And then when we don’t invite her, she’ll write a passive aggressive message like ‘gee thanks for the invite’

Shes a fairweather friend and im done with her. AIBU? Ive been fed up for a while but feel like this is the last straw

Her phone should be on silent then
Silly woman x

Why is the phone in the bedroom anyway?

Why is the phone in the bedroom anyway?
What's wrong with that?

Why is the phone in the bedroom ? To everyone asking this question out yourself in the situation of someone with elderly parents who may die at any moment unexpectedly and possibly in the middle of the night. Or parents of teenagers out and about and for whom, if they get into trouble, you would like to be able to pick up a call whether from them or a hospital or the police etc.
I am old enough to remember life before mobiles and the land line would wake you for wherever it was in a normal sized house.
I do find those who say glibly ‘why have the phone in the bedroom’ quite unbelievable. I may be delicate as my aged and belived ma passed away only a few weeks ago but that’s exactly why I went to bed with my phone, for her, for years. What is hard to understand about that ?
Btw I also took and accepted the risk that I might be woken by the odd text etc from someone.

Why is the phone in the bedroom?
Because it’s your clock, your alarm, your nightlight, your calendar, if you can’t sleep you can use it to listen to music or watch tv or read or chat, when you wake up you can lie in bed and read the news and check your email. Not just for emergency calls.

I have an alarm clock for my alarm clock. I've also had teenagers and ill parents, still never had a phone in the bedroom.

Master andmarghuerita we are all just different then I guess. I know that may be an unmn type of comment in the middle of a slightly spatty thread !

It's your friends responsibility to manage her phone and its sound settings so she isn't disturbed by messages when she is asleep!!

I have family in Aus and US and can get messages at any time of day/night, I don't expect them to message me only during my waking hours!!

YANBU!

mummy2oneandtwo

Yet so many people are overlooking the OP's responsibility in this.

I send messages early because I don’t have my phone all day. I have mine on silent overnight because I’m in a group chat with American and Canadian friends that really would be pinging at 3am!

That's not early at all?! And if she was that bothered about a lay in turn your phone off or at least on silent

you really should have replied - Why the long face